In other states, the Aggie schools are always the subject of jokes spread by in-state rivals. I remember several Texas Aggie jokes circulating before the Holiday Bowl. Well in ten days Cal plays the Aggies. Let the Aggie jokes begin...

Why does Davis play on artificial turf?

To keep the homecoming Queen from grazing on the 50 yard line at half time.

A recent Aggie grad was struggling in his new job as a sales rep in the Central Valley. One after another farm house door was slammed in his face. Becoming desperate to make a sale he decided he had to try a bold approach. At the next farm house, he knocked but did not announce himself. When the door opened a crack he stuck his foot in the opening, refusing to remove it until the farmer heard him out. "Sir, I have a truly great product that will astound you." "Not interested" replied the farmer. "You have to see this product work" "Not interested" replied the farmer. "Sir, I need to make a sale, what can I do to convince you to buy?" "Not interested" replied the farmer. Back and forth it went for several minutes, the Aggie sensed that the farmer was tiring and he made his final pitch. "Sir, I will make a no obligation demonstration of this insect repellant; afterwards you will agree that this is a great product." "Go on" said the farmer tired of the impasse. "Sir, To show how incredibly effective this product is, I propose that we go out into your meadow, I'll cover myself in this repellant, take off my clothes and let you tie me into a chair and leave me there overnight!" "You're crazy" replied the farmer, "But if that's what it will take to have some peace around here tonight, Let's Go."
And off they went into the meadow, applied the repellant and tied the Aggie into the chair, the farmer told the Aggie as he was leaving that if the repellant worked he would be imnpressed and would buy some. The next morning came and the farmer went out to check on the Aggie. He found him slumped in the chair, exhausted and moaning. "What happened son? Were the bugs that bad?" "No, the bugs didn't bother me at all" whispered the Aggie. "Well then what happened to you last night?" The Aggie summoned all his strength to croak, "DOESN'T THAT DAMN CALF HAVE A MOTHER?"

A guy walks into a bar and asks loudly, "Hey, you fellows heard the latest Aggie joke?"

The bartender leans forward and tells the guy, "See that man over there chewing glass? He's 6'4" and weighs about 240 pounds. He played linebacker for Texas A&M. And that other guy over there is 6'5" and goes at about 260 pounds, and is in a really bad mood tonight. He also played for the Aggies. And, me, I'm only 6'2" and 225 pounds, and I've been an Aggie fan all my life. Do you still want to tell your Aggie joke?"

"No way," the guy replied, "I don't have time to explain it to all three of you."

An Aggie went horseback riding one day. Everything was going fine until the horse suddenly started bouncing out of control.

He tried to hang on, but with a foot caught in the stirrup, he fell off headfirst. With his head bouncing up and down, the horse didn't even slow down. And just as the Aggie was giving up hope and losing consciousness, a K-Mart employee came outside and unplugged the horse.

"An Aggie was riding an elevator to his apartment when the elevator stopped and a beautiful woman got on. After the doors closed she hit the STOP button and ripped off all of her clothes, throwing them in a pile on the floor. 'Make me feel like a woman', she says. The Aggie says, 'OK' and rips off his clothes, throwing them on her pile of clothes.
'Alright', he said, 'do the laundry.' "

This had to be the same Aggie Blueblood

On the PA system: 'Cleanup on aisle 25, we have a Aggie down.'



An Aggie and his wife are shopping in their local Wal-Mart.
The Aggie picks up a case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart.
'What do you think you're doing?' asks the wife.
'They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans he replies.
'Put them back, we can't afford them demands the wife, and so they carry on shopping.
A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and puts it in the basket.
What do you think you're doing?' asks the Aggie.
'It’s my face cream. It makes me look beautiful,' replies the wife.
Her husband retorts: 'So does 24 cans of Budweiser and it's half the price.'

All right now, as a bona fide Aggie (class of 79), you are hurting my feelings. It is weird having an affiliation with a Cal opponent as a life-long Bear fan and long time BI member. I am not happy with the Aggies moving out of Division II, however, and will gladly be a Bear fan at the game.

I liked the highly successful programs Davis ran when I was a student when there were no scholarships--true scholar amateur athletes. A fair number of players made it to the NFL, including Rolf Benirschke, Ken O'Brien and 49r back up quarterback Mike Moroski.

OK but just to be fair...let's see...a traveling bear comes upon an Aggie on a farm...noan Aggie sits down next to a bear at a barohnever mind

You resemble those remarks? Wow, that's quite unfortunate...