I met a magical fairy yesterday who said she would grant me one wish.

"I wish to live forever," I said.

"Sorry," said the fairy, "that is the only wish that I'm not allowed to grant."

"Fine," I said, "then I want to die the day after Congress is filled with
honest, hard-working, bipartisan men and women who act only in the people's best interests!"

The fairy replied... "You crafty little *******!"