These three guys walk into a bar...

A Scotsman, an Englishman, and an Irishman are playing
darts at Dolce Vita in Rome.

"Yknow" said the Scotsman, "I still prefer the pubs back home. In Glasgow,
theres a wonderful little bar called McTavishs. The landlord there goes out of
his way for the locals, so much that when you buy 4 drinks hell buy the 5th
drink for you."

"Well," said the Englishman, "at my local, the Red Lion, the barman there will
buy your 3rd drink after you buy the first 2."

"Ahhhhh, thats nothing, laddies," said the Irishman.
"Back home in me own Dublin, theres Ryans Bar. Now, the moment you set
foot in the place theyll buy you a drink, then another, all the drinks you like.
Then, when, when youve had enough drinks, theyll take you upstairs and
see that you get laid. All on the house."

The Englishman and Scotsman immediately scorn the Irishmans claims. But
he swears every word is true.

"Well," said the Englishman, "did this actually happen to you?"

"Not to me meself, personally, no," said the Irishman... "but it did happen to
me sister."

Okay, that was funny.
:-)