cal's monster offensive line

5,147,788 Views | 18001 Replies | Last: 3 hrs ago by juarezbear
Shocky1
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kevin, appreciate your salient points re: the dialpad deal

we're 100% in agreement that dialpad ceo/founder berkeley grad craig walker (scottsdale resident, just opened a tempe dialpad office) is a ROCKSTAR with his support of cal football!!


and props to you in ensuring the football first allocation of this sponsorship, the endless efforts of jay & jenny to undermine bears football & men's basketball got no limits!!


https://instagr.am/p/C27-m9muOvK
Shocky1
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2026 junior amateur at saucon valley: 1st round update

https://instagr.am/p/Da8u2krlOOe
^ charlie woods shot a 76 in his opening round, the current field of 264 will be trimmed after 36 holes on both the old & grace courses to a field of 64 for match play with the winner receiving a spot in the 2026 & 2027 us amateurs & an invitation to the 2027 us open at pebble beach!!

xihuan chang (68, 2 under par, tied for 8th): x played a pga level 4 birdie round on the grace, chang gotta lotta experience in both the us junior & us amateur and no stage in the game of golf is too big for our relentless cali bear competitor!!

callixte alzas (73, 3 over par, tied for 77th): still in close contention for the field of 64 match play despite an uneven round on the grace, the incoming parisian is internationally battle tested with a quarterfinal finish in the british amateur & a member of the europe junior ryder cup team in new york last fall, callixte est magnifique!!

graham christopher (74, 3 over par, tied for 77th): the incoming freshman from westlake village got into the tourney as a 1st alternate after shooting an en fuego 5 under par 65 in local qualifying at franklin bridge in tennessee, solid opening round for graham!!

byuchang yoon (75, 5 over par, tied for 121st): the 17 year old tremendous upside yongin-si south korean native (attends the img academy in florida) still got a chance tomorrow, yoon is a 2027 cal commit with an unlimited future!!

https://instagr.am/p/B1jTGCmIhlB
^ sadly eleonora despite an ELITE ponytail game wuz disqualified by the usga because of her age, sex, taking multiple mulligans during the round, bumping the ball into better lies & some bull**** dress code infraction or something!!
Shocky1
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2028 high school football recruiting update:


right now the cali golden bears got 4 brother duos:

niles & charles "spida man" davis, los angeles
lucky & miles schirmer, la verne
cooper & gunna perry, scottsdale
bastian & meyer swinney, edina

real talk: brahs attending the same school make it a million more times easy (and less costly) for moms & the fam to get to ur fall game days without splitting up tryna to make the travel logistics work

the bears staff is targeting elite SPEED linebacker 6'2" 210 lbs taualli purcell (brother of early playing time true freshman tight end taimane) from kamehameha high school in hawaii


tau is NOT a dumb azz, he got a 3.8 gpa!!

https://instagr.am/p/DasnIDbI4lv
cal poly-berkeley=the 9th island (and a home away from home)
Shocky1
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Shocky1 said:

Shocky1 said:

Shocky1 said:

Shocky1 said:


^ somerville & rolo need to line up the bears behind center (**** the pistol) in 2026 short yardage situations

https://instagr.am/p/DS0rfvIDHbe
shocky walked a brisk 18 holes this morning with his biz mentor (schulzie got highly cherished mentors/friends for various aspects of his life, if u think u know everything ur a ******* dumb azz) jj at desert highlands (just reopened after a fabulous restoration which pulled out all the non indigenous to the desert trees, expanded green surfaces to their original sizes & switched from bermuda to bent greens (the putting surfaces are immaculate)

anyways on the way outta the clubhouse after a quick healthy lunch shocky bumped into nfl half of fame defensive coordinator (gotta home with macaroni grill architecture to the right of the par 5 11th tee box) marv lewis again & the monster asked him if there's every any good reason for a college offensive coordinator to dial up short yardages situations from the shotgun

marv tole me that if ur qb1 is pro style (like jks) & not a dangerous run/read threat with his legs (like kylar murray), it makes NO SENSE to not be under center in short yardage situations!!

lewis also confirmed to me (just like jeff tedford has done to me) that the fastest way to get the ball in the hands of ELITE running backs with SPEED like rb1 adam mohammed & rb1/2 carter vargas on the edges in open space is ******* PITCHOUTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!







UPDATE: after a decade of failing to pound the ball for a yard or two in critical situations which wuz a function of undersized offensive lines & tryna run the ball outta the pistol (the bears wuz 133rd outta 134 fbs teams last season in rushing the ball), offensive coordinator jordan somerville's pro style NFL schemes will feature heisman candidate jaron keawe sagapolutele taking snaps from directly behind center in often heavy 2 tight end formations & will once again feature PITCHOUTS to allow adam & carter to make plays on the edges in wide open space!!

do u got ur tix(s) to the uc championship game on saturday september 5th with a 7:30 pm kickoff at memorial stadium??

this **** is getting LIVE!!#
Shocky1
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Shocky1 said:

https://instagr.am/p/DLUn369tSk5
^ shout out note of appreciation to fellow haas biz school berkeley grad frenchman joel stalter (former dp tour player) bringing the cal coaching staff to the recruiting table with future euro ryder cupper callixte alzas



the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the WORLD (including shocky's beloved world top 25 morfontaine, voila!!)

https://instagr.am/p/DJqDhDWRFup


2026 us junior amateur at saucon valley: 2nd round update


callixte alzas (70, tied for 29th): shot a drama free 1 under par round with a birdie on his final hole, callixte is advancing to tomorrow's field of 64 match play, tres bon mon ami!!

xihuan chang (76, tied for 39th): all the scores get erased as chang advances into match play for our determined soon to be sophomore, CONGRATS x!!

graham christopher (73, missed cut): 2 very consistent rounds of golf on a championship set up, portends well for the future for the 4.0 gpa incoming freshman this summer (who needs to live in the weight room & continue to improve his ball/club speed)

byunchang yoon (76, missed cut): the 2027 cal commit gotta lotta invaluable experience playing on one of the game's largest stages, yoon is gonna be eligible for next year's junior amateur & nobody would be surprised at all if he don't make a deep run then in the national championship

2026 pacific coast amateur: 1st round update

sihao cong (63, tied for 1st): coming off a spectacular late charge to advance in us amateur qualifying, the always smiling cong show opened with an eagle 3 & then added 5 more birds (and no bogies) on a clean scorecard at poppy ridge!!

charlie bundy (70, tied for 54th): slow start to the round but then the haas biz major played the final 11 holes 4 under par

michael weaver (69, tied for 40th): finishing with an eagle 3 on the par 5 18th hole always makes dinner taste better

meanwhile current bears sihao cong, trevor cox & ziqin zhou (the shockster predicts z will be the nation's top collegiate golfer next season) are getting their games & fitness (could be very warm in philly with the possibility of a lotta rounds *36+ hole days in a compressed time space) ready for the 2026 us amateur next month august 10-16th at one of the true cathedrals of golf merion golf club

and yeah last week max homa, michael kim & collin morikawa competed at the 2026 british open

do u really need the monster to break it down for u??

https://instagr.am/p/DXYP9Wrj3Xy
cal is a golf school (that just happens to have the #1 qb1 in college football & a head football coach that don't know **** about maps or something)!!
bluehenbear
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Shocky1
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^ fun fact: derek wilkins is older than 50% of the bears coaching staff & qualifies for the sr citizen discount at supercuts!!



the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university on planet earth (including hamburger golf club falkenstein)
Shocky1
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real talk: coach lup & cherrington have asked the monster to expand the current cali bears football recruiting footprint into cuba!!



esta mierda se esta poniendo buena!!#

Shocky1
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2026 us junior amateur at saucon valley: field of 64 match play

https://instagr.am/p/DbGc3gtsWTa
callixte alzas (5&4 WINNER over stephen eastman): our future ours dore boatraced (callixte, that means profondement vaincu) his unc charlotte signee opponent like javert dealing with those that have broken the law!!

alzas will tee it up next tomorrow morning in the field of 32, winners of those matches will then play a field of 16 match in the afternoon on the old


^ marius fell in love with the wrong girl cosette, the curvy brunette yoga female1 (cbyf1) eponine is always the move mon ami

xihuan chang (1 up WINNER over bodie brumlow): chang closed out the hard fought match over the georgia bulldogs commit with an ice in his veins clutch par 4 on the tricky as **** 350 yard 18th hole on the old course!!

the shockster watched x for 18 holes at tuscon national earlier this year & wuz impressed by his low key fiery demeanor (mini fist pumps when draining putts), commitment to the process (goes thru his routine even on 1 foot putts) & our shared ocd tendencies (chang changes his glove out after every shot, trust me shocky got his own **** going on too with his 2 perrier bottles, etc.) as much as his 2 under round, afterwards schulzy fist bumped his brah & tole him it wuz "truly an honor" to walk with him!!

cal sports is way ******* better in person up close & in the moment, do u got ur tix(s) to the uc championship no holds winner takes all (the loser is ******) BLOODY battle at the barricade on saturday september 5, 2026 at 7:30 pm at ur memorial stadium under the mystic bay area fall lights??

https://instagr.am/p/C6uKQhfrNzF

swan
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Our French star recruit is joined in the round of 32 by rising soph Xihuan Chang, a gutsy 1 up winner over Bodie Brumlow, a Georgia recruit.
Shocky1
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jaron, not gonna lie to u, this is arguably the dumbest ******* football prognostication of the year considering those with NFL sources (such as those with NFL organizations as clients/golf buddies) believe u will be potentially the #1 OVERALL (kinda like my fellow stinson beach high school grad jared goff) pick in the 2028 draft!!

the monster also gets a lotta criticism too but unless it's from a cbyf1 he really don't give 2 ****s

https://instagr.am/p/DHov1KFvJG7
in the immortal words of noted philosopher & king of the volcanoes famika anae "let's ******* go!!!!!!!!!"



cal poly-berkeley=the 9th island (and a home away from home, just ask moana)
Shocky1
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2026 junior amateur at saucon valley: field of 32 match play


callixte alzas (lost 1 up to dawson lew): down 3 holes thru 13, alzas mounted a late round charge with birdies on the par 4 16th & 17th holes but couldn't birdie the 18th hole to force a sudden death playoff against the north carolina commit but the reality is that callixte est magnifique!!

xihuan chang (lost 4&3 to dylan boenning): after a slow start on the 1st 5 holes which resulted in a 4 down deficit, chang played the rest of the round 4 under par but ran outta holes against the scottsdale/washington state player (the monster has hosted 4.0+ gpa at brophy dylan in flagstaff), x's best WORLD class golf is all in front of him!!

2026 land of 10,000 lakes (and mosquitoes, sorry swinneys but this is the truth): 1st round update


michael kim (69, tied for 43rd): with much denser rough this year at tpc ugly azz housing & scoring higher than usual, michael drove the ball well (10 outta 14 fairways) & will hopefully drain a few more putts mañana (only 64 feet in putts) to make a major move up the leaderboard

max homa (72, 103rd): when u dress like a sun city del webb retirement community club pro guy with elastic waisted pants & ur caddie looks like a minor league single a hitting coach outta rehab this **** happens (ok, hitting only 7 outta 14 fairways no es bueno tambien)

collin morikawa (not playing this week, 82 poopy azz diapers cleaned/changed!!): ****, wash ur hands (including under the fingernails) morikawa

2026 pacific amateur at poppy ridge: 3rd round update

sihao cong (68, tied for 3rd): explosive 6 birdie round gets the cong show to 8 under par & within a striking distance 3 strokes of the leader heading into the final round mañana, let's go sihao!!

charlie bundy (66, tied for 21st): my fellow haas biz major rolled in 5 birdies to shoot up the leaderboard, charlie (who would benefit from a couple of more lbs) is dangerous on firm & fast not overly long courses like poppy ridge & pasatiempo

michael weaver (68, tied for 26th): played the first 2 holes in 3 under par & rattled off 3 birds in a row to finish the round (but some bad **** in the middle) which is pretty good for the haas biz ad grad who gotta a grown up finance job (and can't play golf 24/7/365)

https://instagr.am/p/DbI8kw4MPhK
Shocky1
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the following is a reprint from cal's monster class back in the day:

visited this morning the recently opened nicklaus design group ferry point golf course just outside of nyc with panoramic views of the manhattan skyline

https://instagr.am/p/C7dS0GksHlA
arrive from my upper east side central park hotel by cab at the clubhouse around 7:30 am to stretch & warm up at the practice facility

upon arrival the head golf professional tells me that ferry point's developer donald trump heard that as a golf digest & golf magazine rankings panelist that i had an 8:10 tee time and would i like to play with the donald at 8:20 am instead?

so i say sure, no big deal, let's do this

so we make the introductions on the practice green & the 1st thing i notice is that trump has the weirdest color hair ever (kinda yellow orange) & that he has total man boobs along with an oversized obnoxious red cap

i walk & carry my lightweight leather mackzenie bag while the donald drives a golf cart literally to within 6 inches of every green...just as annoyingly, we then proceed to play thru every group on the golf course in front of us (why does he do this, why not just take the 1st tee time?)...it's funny to watch people's reactions as he dictates the playing thru, some golfers are understandably agitated while others want a selfie with him on their phones, he very clearly enjoys all the drama he's created

so he tells us while we wait for the short par 4 8th green to clear that he thinks ferry point is one of the greatest golf courses in the united states (it isn't, there are at least two dozen courses on long island & the hamptons that are significantly better) & that he's qualified to make that statement because of his extensive travels around the globe playing golf, that nobody knows golf architecture better than him & that includes actual golf architects

so in front of his 2 buddies & his cart caddie i tell the donald that actually i'm one of the 13 guys (and the youngest) to have played the world top 100 courses & stare him down...total silence, one of his buddies who is the chairman of macys starts to laugh & donald play punches my shoulder kinda hard, he's been pwned...whatever

dude is an interesting guy but playing golf with him is not really a celebration of the game but more like riding a roller coaster



you're fired, shocky#

UPDATE: the potential next prez of the united states of america lives (commutes to sacramento) with his family just minutes from my alma mater stinson beach high school & loves the uc system's flagship university's football program!!

and yeah to gavin's credit he's never ******* punched the shockster like donald!!

Shocky1
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MONSTER FUN times tonite in goodyear arizona at zony's 1st buc-ee's!!

https://instagr.am/p/DbKjvZ-NiGr
KAAAAAAABBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMM!!

https://instagr.am/p/DZRhSGuSeG2
fun fact: they do NOT sell sushi, 32 oz green juices or yoga mats at buc-ee's (not to be confused with erewhons)!!



cal's diamonds are forever class#
swan
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Michael Kim shoots an unbelievable 59 to take the lead in the 3M Open at 14 under. Max (at +1) has yet to start his 2nd round. Projected cut line is currently at -2, so Max has work to do.
Shocky1
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https://instagr.am/p/DbLtH5AukHt
59 KAAAAAAABBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

michael, **** the green jackets & all that other stupid ****, this MONSTER song (exclusively reserved for cali bear golfing EXCELLENCE) is dedicated to u brah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LET"S ******* GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



theory can take u only so far in life (145 feet in draino putts is the real deal)!!#
swan
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Shocky,

Mike's 59 is a wakeup call for golf fans for forgot (or never knew) that he was the number uno college golfer in 2013.
I look forward to a possible shoot-out with Scotty on Sunday.
Shocky1
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swany, 100% agreed that it should be highlighted that michael wuz the #1 national player of the year on the most dominant team (michael kim, max homa, brandon hagy, michael weaver & joel stalter) in the history of collegiate golf (won more tournaments that season than any program evah often by boat racing the field but inexplicably lost to illinois in the ncca quarterfinals)

as the person who these days watches michael in person at tournaments more than anybody on planet earth (other than his ideal fit transformative caddie danny stout) today's 59 & his ascent to his current official golf ranking of #57 is not surprising to me at all...no cap, michael has evolved from a cut fade in college to a sean foley mentored powerful draw in 2026!!

kim wuz lightly recruited outta torrey pines high school due to weighing around 120 lbs but built his body up during his freshman year in berkeley en route to becoming the best player in the nation by the end of his junior year

but the real S&C WORK has come in the last 18 months when kim has gained 10+ lbs of pure muscle (now 170+lbs) thru SPEED training...it should be noted that morikawa (now 170+ lbs too) gained 10+ lbs last offseason before his victory at pebble beach & that homa is an absolute work out warrior in scottsdale (just like other north scottsdale pros jon rahm, tony finau, wyndham clark, jake knapp, michael brennan, david puig, josele ballester, etc that absolutely pulverize the golf ball) in a game that has evolved to reward ELITE ball/club SPEED!!

schulzy honestly believes rising junior ziqin zhou (who defeated this season's 2026 pga tour university winner ben james of virginia for the acc individual championship) got all the skillz (both mentally and physically plus work ethic) to be the nation's #1 ranked player this upcoming season...z is the only bear in the program that is not currently undersized but will need to embrace a yoga/meditation practice to mitigate his back issues (real talk: both kim & morikawa also got back issues which is in part a function of relentless s&c work)

make no mistake about it, this is truly the GOLDEN ERA for cali golf!!



^ it is very possible that in the very near future michael will have more social media followers than anybody (other than you tuber deshambles) in the game of golf due to his authentic storytelling re: life on the pga tour as a disciple of cal's monster class back in the day
Shocky1
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this is cal football (thx to craig walker, do u got ur tix to the uc championship game on september 5th under the lights??)!!#
Shocky1
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2026 100,000 lakes & pale white people tournament: 2nd round update

https://instagr.am/p/DbL4XnbDx7w
michael kim (59, 1st place): thx to the favorable weather thursday afternoon/friday morning draw coupled with ELITE play michael has parachuted to a 3 stroke lead & all the headwinds of the cali golden bears worldwide fanbase heading into the weekend, let's ******* go, michael!!

max homa (74, missed cut): max, you've traveled more miles on airplanes the last couple of weeks than anybody on planet earth (that wuz a physically & mentally exhausted hangry dude out on the golf course today), glad ur coming HOME to scottsdale (and not playing next week in detroit) for a well deserved timeout with the fam (plus ellis needs to check in with his maricopa county probation officer or something)!!

2026 pacific coast amateur: 4th round update

sihao cong (70, tied for 5th): cong show, luv seeing the fight to the end (birdie on the 18th hole today), ur peaking at the right time for the us amateur (joining teammates trevor cox & ziqin zhou) on august 10-16th at merion!!

michael weaver (71, tied for 29th): weave is no doubt proud of his old teammate mr 59!!

charlie bundy (74, tied for 41st): with high gpa berridge outta eligibility, bundy is now the smartest bear in the program, the haas biz major knows what he has to do to take his game to the next level


^ why the **** is andrew mcgraw singing on stage wearing a dodgers lid in new york city instead of getting **** ready for the 2026 berkeley bears football season (this is very confusing)??
Shocky1
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2026 10,000 degrees midwest humidity tournament: 3rd round update

michael kim (70, tied for 6th): michael hit the ball well (11 outta 14 fairways & 15 of 18 greens in regulation) but wuz tentative (lesson learned, playing in the final group is a different deal from a feels stadndpoint) with his holing putt speed not aggressive enuf which resulted in only 47 feet in putts drained (after a free wheeling 145 feet yesterday during the 59) but that's golf sometimes & mañana (great pairing tomorrow with billy ho) es un dia nuevo!!

https://instagr.am/p/DbL0izBObaz
Shocky1
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cal's MONSTER class official poll:

https://instagr.am/p/DXaRPvnDfYN
yeah there's been a lotta EPIC storming the field/court/18th green FUN celebrations along the way but what are the worstest head coach QUOTES & heart breaking LOSSES in ur life??

the shockster's nomination for the biggest dip**** head coach QUOTE wuz justin wilcox's pre season insights that after months of analytic evaluation that if the bears scored at least 1 touchdown a quarter (basically 28+ points) then the odds wuz good that if would be a successful winning season

that revealing quote brought clarity re: the wilcox very private veneer (justin is doing the hang these days at his waterfront home that is only accessible by a boat a couple of doors down from the coeur d'alene resort in idaho that we wuz NOT competing for championships (only mediocrity)


^ tryna hide ur inner/outer beauty is not gonna work in 24/7/365 relationships (much better to be urself, a FUN outlook & a smokeshow PONYTAIL is all u need), both of my daughters shay & taylor wear minimal make up

my final straw with wilcox wuz the la bowl on a smoggy december nite (with unreal poor air quality) at the sci-fi stadium in becky g's old hood when the head coach started playing the 2nd & 3rd string players in the 2nd quarter when it wuz revealed that he viewed this bowl game as an exhibition/end of season reward deal for the program (the only highlight wuz doms doing 2:00 am ibiza nightclub sexy as **** dirty dancing on the jumbotron) while unlv treated it like a national television audience ******* super bowl or something

the back up selection for the most dumb azz QUOTE wuz documented (divorce court proceeding) terrible human being wyking jones (outta hoops, now tryna sell real estate in vegas) stating his bears wuz gonna run a full court "nightmare" press with length like louisville despite the fact that anybody with a montera middle school level bb iq could tell u the roster wuz full of borderline d1 athletes

the monster's nomination for the worst LOSS wuz the ncca 1st round tournament loss to them hawaii rainbows in freezing azz spokane when the bears wuz down 2 future nba ballers (t-wall injured after ******* around in the basketball house & the stressed out bird with his then undiagnosed mental health issues dnp) which resulted in the mcdonalds all american duo of jaylen & young ivee tryna do too much which resulted in turnovers (multiple charging calls) & poor shot selections and the end of de facto general manager schulzy's quest for a men's basketball national championship in berkeley

the back up selection is the #1 ranked 2013 men's golf team inexplicable 3&2 LOSS to illinois in the ncca quaterfinals, even now in conversation at lunch at the chandler cheesecake factory with hall of fame coach steve desimone (everybody loves des) that shocking upset cannot be fully comprehended re: the most DOMINATING team in the history of college golf

and yeah a potential LOSS in the upcoming september 5, 2026 uc championship 7:30 pm kickoff battle under the lights at memorial stadium with mystic bay area nightfall would be right up there too, do u got ur tix(s) for the most important season opener in the history of berkeley bears football (the loser of this game is ****** & the winner is gonna be soaring with intergalactic program headwinds)??

Shocky1
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2026 10,000 midwest white castles tournament: 4th round update

https://instagr.am/p/Cg5c6-kJCiN
^ oski's +1 athletic hoa hanau

michael kim (69, tied for 10th): despite a couple early round shots lost to the left, michael battled back like EL JEFE to play the last 7 holes 4 under par & post a top 10 finish!!


kim is now #61 (up from #65) in the fed ex standings (top 70 qualify for the 1st playoff event, top 50 qualify for the 2nd playoff event & top 30 qualify for the tour championship at east lake)...michael is signed up for detroit this upcoming week while max & collin both take a vacay week

good luck to ziqin zhou in competing in the western amateur at the low key gem beverly which is the most underrated course in chicagoland (torture track butler national is the most overrated) due to it being on the "wrong" (southside) side of the tracks in his final tune up before joining teammates trevor cox & sihao cong at merion for the 2026 us amateur

https://instagr.am/p/DbLTPnYjE-y
r u a BOSS man/lady that controls ur destiny (a high gpa leading to a berkeley, stanford & ivy league degree will OPEN a lotta doors in life)??#
Shocky1
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https://instagr.am/p/DTTakjlEqBY
cal's monster class translation:
https://bearinsider.com/s/5175/mason-mini-in-his-words-why-i-chose-cal/2

"Hi my name is Mason "Not So" Mini and I got soft hands, a good GPA like Shocky and I'm from Pacifica which got the greatest ******* Taco Bell on planet earth!!"

https://instagr.am/p/DOzc6fRD0FX
Shocky1
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real talk: life is NOT linear!!

https://instagr.am/p/DbJ1SusxWQ9
don't be a dumb azz (true love is not replaceable, wut's ur gpa??)#
Shocky1
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cal special teams update: kicking game

https://instagr.am/p/C7POgB-g3RM
^ exclusive tryout footage in last foto

ryan longwell is lobbying coach zach attack to bring in a "left footed kicker1 with a big leg from stinson beach high school" to perpetuate the recent legacies of dario "two iron trajectory" longhetto & ryan "amped up" coe!!

not so fun fact: all american/nfl prospect mateen bhaghani is gonna be bringing his collin morikawa ice in his veins laser precision to memorial stadium on saturday september 5, 2026, our u gonna lose ur **** if the uc championship game is decided by a last minute field goal??

wut could possibly go wrong??#

note: 9th post by the monster, u know the story
sonofabear51
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Bump.

Hey Bill, I can see it coming down to a field goal to win it.

Should have kept Bhagani.
Shocky1
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california golden bears yucky blucky fruitcake classes (mr spieker not amused cuz he got worser seats):

doechii, why don't you introduce the yucky blucky fruitcakes to the class?

2028 class:

brody rudnicki, quarterback (4.0 gpa)

2027 class:

dajohn yarborough, offensive lineman (3.1 gpa)
ace dawson-herman, offensive lineman (3.2 gpa)
zion white, wide receiver (3.1 gpa)
kamil loud, defensive back (3.7 gpa)
jamie sturgeon, tight end (3.2 gpa)
isaiah bertola, offensive lineman (3.15 gpa)
demare dezeure, wide receiver (3.0+ gpa)
jeovanni "jeo" henley, defensive back (3.3 gpa)

jaderian "jd" jones, defensive tackle (3.4 gpa)
josh bunni, offensive lineman (3.0 gpa)
rahzario (zo) edwards, tight end (3.0+ gpa)
elyjah staples, linebacker (4.2 gpa)
dane weber, quarterback (3.8 gpa)

duvay williams, corner/nickel back (3.2 gpa)
jaxsen stokes, running back (3.7 gpa)
miles isaac schirmer, defensive lineman (3.5 gpa)
antwon "aj" sanders iii, running back (3.0+ gpa)
charles "spida" davis iii, wideout (3.0+ gpa)
troy bowens, edge defender (3.7 gpa)
blake gunter, wide receiver (4.0 gpa)
zach brien, kicker (3.8 gpa)
gunnar perry, linebacker (3.7 gpa)
giovanni hodge, edge defender (4.0 gpa)

2026 class:

david bird, longsnapper (4.0 gpa)
jacob johnson, punter (3.1 gpa)
sosaia noa, tight end (3.0+ gpa)
roger vaderhoef, offensive lineman (3.5 gpa)

rico walker, tight end (3.1 gpa)
aj tuitele, linebacker (3.0 gpa)
joshua pierce, edge defender (4.0 gpa)
jayden williams, defensive line (3.1 gpa)
kamar mothudi, inside linebacker (3.3 gpa)
ricky "trenches" fletcher, defensive back (3.3 gpa)
jericho johnson, defensive tackle (3.0+ gpa)
emmanuel okoye, edge defender (strong student from nigeria)
jackson brosseau, quarterback (3.96 gpa)
angus davies, punter (honor roll student from australia)
daniel harris, cornerback (3.1 gpa)
ashton rivera, offensive lineman (3.7 gpa)
kahlee tafai, offensive lineman (3.15 gpa)
ashun shepphard, defensive line (3.0+ gpa)
cooper perry, wide receiver (4.1 gpa)
towns mcgough, kicker (4.0 gpa)
marquis "mgk" groves-killebrew (3.3 gpa)
justin beadles, defensive lineman (3.0 gpa)
tristan jernigan, inside linebacker (3.0+ gpa)
jimothy lewis jr, offensive tackle (3.4 gpa)
michael hurst jr, safety (3.0+ gpa)
chase hendricks, wide receiver (3.21 gpa)
mykeal rabess, offensive lineman (3.68 gpa)
carter vargas, running back (3.2 gpa)
ashten emory, running back (3.7 gpa)
dorian thomas, tight end (3.6 gpa)
adam mohammed, running back (3.5 gpa)
kingston lopa, defensive back (3.0 gpa)
ian strong, wide receiver (3.75 gpa)
jacob arop, offensive lineman (3.0 gpa)
solomon williams, edge defender (3.0+ gpa)

niles davis, athlete (3.71 gpa)
daniel mcmorris, offensive tackle (3.8 gpa)
kai meza, wide receiver (3.6 gpa)
tyree "reekus" sams, wide receiver (3.3 gpa)
kamo'i huihui-white, offensive lineman (3.9 gpa)
nainoa lopes, quarterback (3.57 gpa)
kingston "lucky" schirmer, defensive lineman (3.0 gpa)
esaiah wong, offensive lineman (3.0+ gpa)
frank fauna jr, defensive lineman (4.0 gpa)
emmanuel "ej" morgan, wide receiver/kick returner (4.3 gpa)
taimane purcell, tight end (3.9 gpa)
nemyah telona, defensive lineman (3.0+ gpa)
victor santino, running back (3.0+ gpa)
elisha faamatuainu, offensive lineman (3.0+ gpa)
jaxon pyatt, linebacker (3.4 gpa)
jonathan mckinley, linebacker (4.83 gpa)

2025 class (all former walk ons are now on schollys, CONGRATS!!):

aaron hampton, inside linebacker (3.4 gpa)
jordan king, wide receiver (4.38 gpa)
alonzo esparza, quarterback (4.0 gpa)
belay brummell, quarterback (3.95 gpa)
carson perry-smith, wide receiver (4.1 gpa)
jayden parker, running back (4.16 gpa)
isaac torres, wide receiver (3.5 gpa)
mayze bryant, defensive back (3.5 gpa)
jordan franke, longsnapper (3.81 gpa)
dean taylor-chapman, running back (4.0 gpa)
tobey weydemuller, defensive back (3.92 gpa)
jude mclellan, outside linebacker (3.9 gpa)
nate escalada, defensive back (4.23 gpa)
michael cooley, outside linebacker (3.0 gpa)
ewan arechaederra, longsnapper (3.6 gpa)
lucas vanderlind, inside linebacker (4.2 gpa)
bj jones, inside linebacker (3.55 gpa)
sam bjerke, offensive lineman (3.9 gpa)
cole bosica, wide receiver (4.1 gpa)
myles reber, wide receiver (3.75 gpa)
jeffrey johnson, tight end (3.7 gpa)
jack olyphant, tight end (3.72 gpa)
rj stephens, defensive lineman (3.77 gpa)
dru polidore jr, safety (3.75 gpa)
michael kern, punter (3.4 gpa)

landon morris, tight end (3.7 gpa)
jayden dixon-veal, wide receiver (2.9 gpa)
lj johnson, running back (3.7 gpa)
abram murray, kicker (4.0 gpa)
brent "paco" austin, corner/nickel (3.3 gpa)
jordan sanford, wide receiver (3.5 gpa)
harrison taggart, linebacker (3.9 gpa)
chase meyer, kicker (4.3 gpa)
mark hamper, wide receiver (3.5 gpa)
zae smith, defensive tackle (3.37 gpa)
daveion harley, offensive lineman (3.36 gpa)
kendrick raphael, running back (3.8 gpa)
quimari shemwell, corner/nickel back (3.0+ gpa)
brandon high jr, running back (3.3 gpa)
rino monteforte, longsnapper (4.0 gpa)
tj bush, edge defender (3.3 gpa)
quaron adams, wide receiver (3.0 gpa)
chris victor, edge defender (3.3 gpa)
jojo genova, offensive lineman (3.5 gpa)
erik peters, kicker (3.9 gpa)
devin brown, quarterback (4.4 gpa)
dazmin james, wide receiver (2.6 gpa)
justin hasenhuetl, interior offensive lineman (3.75 gpa)
jacob de jesus, wide receiver/kick returner (3.67 gpa)
caleb johnston, longsnapper (3.5 gpa)
simon mapa, tight end (3.47 gpa)
mason mini, tight end (3.8 gpa)
john gayer, edge defender (2.8 gpa)
jordon moko, offensive line (3.8 gpa)
jayden wayne, edge defender (4.0 gpa)
brook honoree jr, punter (3.8 gpa)
dominic ingrassia, quarterback (3.2 gpa)
jaron keawe sagapolutele, quarterback (3.75 gpa)
buom jock, inside linebacker (3.1 gpa)
leon bell, offensive tackle (3.1 gpa)
tristan dunn, safety (3.0 gpa)
lamar robinson, offensive guard (3.5 gpa)
tyson ruffins, interior offensive lineman (3.8 gpa)
lajuan owens, left tackle (3.2 gpa)
hezekiah masses, corner/nickel (2.7 gpa)
kyle cunanan, kicker (3.73 gpa)
tyson ford, defensive lineman (3.4 gpa)
odera okaka, edge defender (3.3 gpa)
john tofi jr, edge defender (3.8 gpa)
aiden manutai, safety (4.0 gpa)
tre' harrison, safety (4.83 gpa)
mike klisiewicz, offensive lineman (3.7 gpa)
jacob houseworth, tight end (3.15 gpa)
jae'on young, corner/nickel back (3.4 gpa)
lebron williams, defensive end (3.2 gpa)
beckham barney, inside linebacker (4.2 gpa)
anthony league, running back (3.9 gpa)
ikechukwu okafor, edge defender (3.7 gpa)
ben howard, offensive guard (3.2 gpa)
meyer swinney, hybrid wide receiver/tight end (3.75 gpa)
kaden cook, cornerback (3.4 gpa)

2024 class:

will mcdonald, left guard (3.5 gpa)
cheikhsaliou fall, edge defender (3.3 gpa)
cj harris, quarterback (3.5 gpa)
serigne tounkara, edge defender (3.88 gpa)
kyion graves, wide receiver (3.3 gpa)
ryan yaites, safety (3.2 gpa)
jasiah wagoner, corner/nickel back (3.25 gpa)
tj bollers, edge defender (4.0 gpa)
corey dyches, hybrid tight end/wide receiver (3.1 gpa)
braden miller, offensive tackle (4.0 gpa)
liam johnson, inside linebacker (3.36 gpa at princeton)

khamani hudson, cornerback (3.5 gpa)
bobby engstler, punter/kicker (3.72 gpa)
jonathan "gameday" brady, wide receiver (3.2 gpa)
mikey miller, wide receiver (3.8 gpa)
victor stoffel, offensive tackle (motivated student in sweden)
kadarius calloway, running back (2.7 gpa)
ryan coe, kicker (3.5 gpa)
tobias merriweather, wide receiver (3.6 gpa)
ja'ir smith, defensive back (3.0+ gpa)
syris corley, offensive lineman (3.0 gpa)
rush reimer, offensive lineman (3.3 gpa)
marcus harris, defensive back (3.2 gpa)
aidan ikaika keanaaina, defensive tackle (4.0 gpa)
aiden newbill, offensive line (3.72 gpa)
isaiah crosby, safety (3.0+ gpa)
luke ferrelli, inside linebacker (4.0 gpa)
chandler rogers, quarterback (3.3 gpa)
teddye buchanan, inside linebacker (3.5 gpa)
josiah martin, wide receiver (3.5 gpa)
jack endries, tight end (3.83 gpa)
trond grizzell, wide receiver (3.8 gpa)
bj canady, defensive tackle (3.91 gpa)
legend journey, apex predator edge defender (3.3 gpa)
ej caminong, quarterback (3.5 gpa)
dayton "dayday" aupiu, defensive back (3.51 gpa)
jamaal wiley, running back (2.75 gpa)
trevor rogers, wide receiver (3.5 gpa)
michael-anthony okwura, defensive lineman (3.4 gpa)
eze osondu, inside linebacker (3.5 gpa)
brookyln cheek, defensive back (2.9 gpa)
camden jones, tight end (2.7 gpa)
tyler knape, offensive line (3.8 gpa)

2023 class:
barrett miller, offensive lineman (4.2 hs gpa & stanford mechancial engineering degree)
taj davis, wide receiver (3.2 gpa)
king doerue, running back (3.5 gpa)
isaiah ifanse, running back (3.2 gpa at montana state)
marcus scott ii, cornerback (3.3 gpa at missouri)
tidiane "frenchy" jalloh (motivated student from france)
matthew wykoff, offensive tackle (3.75 gpa)
marquez "mojo" dortch, wide receiver (2.9 gpa)
ben finley, quarterback (4.308 gpa)
patrick mcmorris, safety (3.65 gpa)
david bird, longsnapper (4.0 gpa)
marquis montgomery, wide receiver (3.4 gpa)
martin tine, offensive tackle (2.9 gpa)
stanley mckenzie, nose tackle (3.3 gpa)

david reese, outside linebacker (3.7 gpa)
sam jackson v, quarterback (2.8 gpa)
brian hightower, wide receiver (3.2 gpa)
justin williams-thomas aka j-will, running back (4.0 gpa)
asher alberding, tight end (3.85 gpa)
jt byrne, tight end (3.75 gpa)
lachlan wilson, punter (strong student from australia)
byron caldwell, running back (3.3 gpa)
sergio allen, inside linebacker (3.4 gpa)
matt littlejohn, defensive back (3.0 gpa)
jaivian "the jet" thomas, running back (3.4 gpa)
nohl williams, defensive back (3.61 gpa)
kaylin moore, defensive back (3.4 gpa)
frederick williams iii, offensive line (3.6 gpa)
zurich ashford, defensive end (3.62 gpa)
ben marshall, tight end (3.4 gpa)
ryan mcculloch, outside linebacker (4.1 gpa)
tiumalu afalava, defensive line (4.1 gpa)
cade uluave, inside linebacker (3.85 gpa)
sailasa vadrawale, defensive back (3.46 gpa)
nyziah hunter, wide receiver (2.7 gpa)
nick morrow, offensive tackle (3.7 gpa)
michael luckhurst, kicker (4.37 gpa)



wow, that was quite the introduction, doechii, we're gonna have to talk after class...don't forget to take the chicken out

https://instagr.am/p/DAb8NtkBYtv
Shocky1
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2026 cali bears football biggest CONCERNS heading into fall ball on august 5th:


1) inside linebackers: good news to hear that coach lup thinks highly of alaska native aaron hampton because all the guys including portal transfers (all from powerhouse football factories) tristan jernigan, aj tuitele & kamar mothudi are UNPROVEN as starters, replacing the inside steady play of cade & luke is gonna be critical to a MONSTER victories season with the uc championship game now within our sites


2) defensive line: great news is that the 2027 high school commitment class gotta lotta immediate impact starters/playing rotation standouts with potential NFL upside but the d-line right now is a concern from both starter productivity (star power) & reliable depth

3) left tackle: let's be real here last season last season the bears got the WORST tackles in the p4, guys that that lacked the strength to impose their will in the run game & lacked the mobility in open space to nullify apex predator edge rushers in the pass game...stud jimothy lewis solves the problem in guarding the jks blindside at right tackle but the ongoing battle between frederick williams iii & jacob arop at left tackle will determine if the bears are finally gonna operate (potentially drop 50) behind a cal's MONSTER offensive line

https://instagr.am/p/DbGfauUH9BJ
4) kicking game: punter angus davies is gonna be the solution to solving the erratic/inconsistent play at this position but it remains to be seen if kickers chase meyer or towns mcough are gonna be ready to star on broadway in a potentially EPIC season in berkeley


real talk: if none of this **** works out the shockster (who intends to watch all 13 games in person) is probably gonna move to ******* alaska (finding a buc-ee's & new yoga studio could be problematic) or something!!

JB was a Chieftain
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Shocky1 said:

2026 cali bears football biggest CONCERNS heading into fall ball on august 5th:


1) inside linebackers: good news to hear that coach lup thinks highly of alaska native aaron hampton because all the guys including portal transfers (all from powerhouse football factories) tristan jernigan, aj tuitele & kamar mothudi are UNPROVEN as starters, replacing the inside steady play of cade & luke is gonna be critical to a MONSTER victories season with the uc championship game now within our sites


2) defensive line: great news is that the 2027 high school commitment class gotta lotta immediate impact starters/playing rotation standouts with potential NFL upside but the d-line right now is a concern from both starter productivity (star power) & reliable depth

3) left tackle: let's be real here last season last season the bears got the WORST tackles in the p4, guys that that lacked the strength to impose their will in the run game & lacked the mobility in open space to nullify apex predator edge rushers in the pass game...stud jimothy lewis solves the problem in guarding the jks blindside at right tackle but the ongoing battle between frederick williams iii & jacob arop at left tackle will determine if the bears are finally gonna operate (potentially drop 50) behind a cal's MONSTER offensive line

https://instagr.am/p/DbGfauUH9BJ
4) kicking game: punter angus davies is gonna be the solution to solving the erratic/inconsistent play at this position but it remains to be seen if kickers chase meyer or towns mcough are gonna be ready to star on broadway in a potentially EPIC season in berkeley


real talk: if none of this **** works out the shockster (who intends to watch all 13 games in person) is probably gonna move to ******* alaska (finding a buc-ee's & new yoga studio could be problematic) or something!!



Great list Shocks! I agree on all 3 of those. Another big concern I have is how the coaching will look this upcoming season. Motivating players and making sure they are prepared (not Wilcox strong point) will definitely be better but with 2 young fresh coordinators that are relatively green, they need to hit the ground running.
Shocky1
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jb, argreed re: there's no soft landing for hutchings & somerville with the uc championship in game 1 but honestly they've both worked in the NFL (which is like a harvard mba for coaching) so that should mitigate any worries re: this issue, keep in mind under the wilcox era justin never hired then current NFL guys tho he did bring in multiple guys with drinking/mental health issues

as long as jaron is standing on 4 paws (which will largely be a function of the play of the o-line), really think we're in for an EPIC 2026 season!!

https://instagr.am/p/DbUP04hDOqF
wifeisafurd
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JB was a Chieftain said:

Shocky1 said:

2026 cali bears football biggest CONCERNS heading into fall ball on august 5th:


1) inside linebackers: good news to hear that coach lup thinks highly of alaska native aaron hampton because all the guys including portal transfers (all from powerhouse football factories) tristan jernigan, aj tuitele & kamar mothudi are UNPROVEN as starters, replacing the inside steady play of cade & luke is gonna be critical to a MONSTER victories season with the uc championship game now within our sites


2) defensive line: great news is that the 2027 high school commitment class gotta lotta immediate impact starters/playing rotation standouts with potential NFL upside but the d-line right now is a concern from both starter productivity (star power) & reliable depth

3) left tackle: let's be real here last season last season the bears got the WORST tackles in the p4, guys that that lacked the strength to impose their will in the run game & lacked the mobility in open space to nullify apex predator edge rushers in the pass game...stud jimothy lewis solves the problem in guarding the jks blindside at right tackle but the ongoing battle between frederick williams iii & jacob arop at left tackle will determine if the bears are finally gonna operate (potentially drop 50) behind a cal's MONSTER offensive line

https://instagr.am/p/DbGfauUH9BJ
4) kicking game: punter angus davies is gonna be the solution to solving the erratic/inconsistent play at this position but it remains to be seen if kickers chase meyer or towns mcough are gonna be ready to star on broadway in a potentially EPIC season in berkeley


real talk: if none of this **** works out the shockster (who intends to watch all 13 games in person) is probably gonna move to ******* alaska (finding a buc-ee's & new yoga studio could be problematic) or something!!



Great list Shocks! I agree on all 3 of those. Another big concern I have is how the coaching will look this upcoming season. Motivating players and making sure they are prepared (not Wilcox strong point) will definitely be better but with 2 young fresh coordinators that are relatively green, they need to hit the ground running.

Good list, but:

Cade & Luke playing steady ball? Both are extremely athletic, and made some big plays. But a good portion of the big plays against Cal last year were because they were playing selfish hero ball, were out of position, and got burned. A film review of some loses, like VA Tech are telling. They played undisciplined defense, and the offensive coordinators from other teams knew it and bated them. With Cade is was sometime with coaching permission "to make plays" when the defense was being pushed around, but Luke got benched a lot during games. I think some of this was about the coaching and missing Sirmon who is a great position coach, and one big add is that seasoned and respected Bob Gregory now controls linebackers. It will be interesting to see how Cade and Luke play with their new teams (I think Cade will be all Big 12, where Luke needs to mature on the mental side). The guy to look out for now is AJ Tuitele, who looked like the best linebacker overall in spring practice. Sorta a smaller version of one of my favorite Bears, Evan Weaver
Shocky1
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alex, good to hear aj is showing out for a room losing 188 tackles from last season's starters, my take re: the virginia tech ****show is that the bears wuz playing with 10 defenders (zeke wut literally playing non contact flag football on the edges in run game support) & that instead of incessantly yelling at the staff on the sideline the entire 2nd half because cade & luke wuz running into the wrong fits/gaps that wilcox should've benched masses in favor of aaron hampton as a qb1 spy to counterattack the all nite long keepers

Shocky1
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r u ready (mini *not mason plans are available)??#
Shocky1
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does this mean no more gameday threads on the bearinsider.com??

ruh roh (do u got ur tixs for this fall??)#
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