cal's monster offensive line

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Shocky1
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the MAGIC of cal poly-berkeley football!!#
Shocky1
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2028 3.4 gpa 6'2" 215 lbs developing linebacker jayden lewis from st francis high school#

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (including the 650)
Shocky1
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Shocky1
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3.8 gpa MONSTER o-lineman#
Shocky1
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^ dude just got tole she's dumping him for future berkeley grad brady palmer

2025 canadian open: 2nd round update

byeong "ben" an (64, tied for 18th): this national championship is playing at almost 7400 yards with punishing rough that sinks wayward shots from view & favors powerful ball strikers with elite clubhead speed like ben (6th in driving distance thus far at 323+ yards off the tee) or zinqin "eric" zhou...unlike yesterday the putts dropped today plus an is 12th in driving accuracy (22 of 28 fairways hit) & missed only 5 greens during the first 36 holes...ben could potentially contend this weekend if his broomstick putter cooperates

max homa (69, missed cut): max hit his best iron shot of the year on the brutal par 4 17th hole when he lasered an unreal 200+ yard iron from a sketchy stance in a fairways sand trap on a blind shot over a deep bunker lip to 20 feet!!!...the new caddie arrangement is gonna work with the new guy kinda like a mute bad azz super hero with sunglasses who doesn't say a whole lot & just let's max play golf without a lotta extra thoughts in his head...homa is trending in the right direction
Shocky1
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Shocky1 said:


2026 cal's monster class recruiting update:

visiting may 29th during the 1st of the 3 key recruiting weekends will be elite 11 6'3" 195 lbs quarterback brady palmer (not related to arnold) from cathedral catholic high school in san diego...rolo is running point on extending actionable offers in the qb room & the indian valley hacker has developed a lotta qbs who get PAID in the national football league (plus he's wise enuf to always order the beef tofu at china palace)


^ good manners: shocky also always offers to take his kicks off when entering people's homes, shoes r for losers


real talk: the cal football program is the right choice for those that wanna build generational wealth via their nfl aspirations competing in the acc & working hard in the classrooms of berkeley in a fiercely competitive global economy that unremorsefully favors cal, stanford & ivy league grads while low academic football factory skools (which r often located in ****hole truck stop towns with lousy cold azz level 7 hypothermia weather in the winter & helllike hot muggy humidity in the summer) dispose of their low gpa gladiators once their marginal utility is all used up leaving them to working nite security at legoland at age 30

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world
https://instagr.am/p/DKlSBotxlTs
KAAAAABBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!

rolo got his top targeted 2026 quarterback, party at brady's house after the 7:30 pm kickoff san diego state game at snapdragon stadium on saturday september 20th!!

fun fact: this is a grounded young man that wuz actively recruited by ohio state & his qb development coach thru the years is jordan palmer (there's no blood relationship to jordan or carson) whose kids view him kinda like an uncle
bencgilmore
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Booooom!
Shocky1
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https://instagr.am/p/DKlQCt9JDFG
benny, in recognition of this commitment legoland is gonna build a replica memorial stadium (with no markeisha/knowlton inspired tarps, just berkeley students with FREE tixs) with 68,249 lego pieces including a miniature brady palmer & shocky doing a headstand in the north endzone tunnel!!

and yeah buc-ee not oski is the mascot, don't be a dumb azz

https://instagr.am/p/DA4iDhCyehB
Shocky1
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Shocky1 said:


2026 cal's monster class recruiting update: official visitors for june 6th-8th

after a wildly successful 1st weekend the 2nd wave of 3 summertime recruiting official visits will see the staff hosting 11 visitors scheduled at this time for the claremont this weekend

among the visitors will be current cal commits lockdown corner/nickel jayden crowder from santa margarita high school & sideline to sideline linebacker jaxon pyatt from arvada west high school north of denver...both future bears got 3.4 gpas & are true student athletes with academic ambition

in state cali official visitors will include 4.3 gpa dangerous wideout emanuel "ej" morgan from central high school in fresno, 3.0 gpa lengthy cornerback major hinchen from la quinta high school in the palm desert, mobile defensive lineman 4.0 gpa frank fanua from mount miguel high school in spring valley & 3.5 gpa elite longsnapper giancarlo cereghino from caldecott tunnel high school

outta state official visitors will include high motor interior offensive lineman koloi keli from farrington high school in honolulu, 3.8 gpa mauler offensive lineman khalil sanogo from mansfield west high school south of ft worth, highly productive defensive lineman keytrin harris from compass prep high school in chandler, 3.5 gpa destructive defensive lineman kordae houston from south oak cliff high school south of dallas & +1 athletic tight end luca georg wolf from vienna austria

this will be updated as musical chairs creates ongoing changes to travel plans, the staff needs to specifically focus/target upon higher gpas/academic profiles in assembling the very promising 2026 high school class


https://instagr.am/p/C38GIs4rZAy
dear potential california golden bears,

how r u??

i am fine

u may not already know this but the swimming pool at the claremont is clothing optional (particularly late at nite, shocky knows that for sure), got it??

anyways enjoy ur weekend & remember that the fiercely competitive global economy favors cal, stanford & ivy league grads in building generational wealth as do curvy brunette yoga females so don't be afraid to say no to low gpa/academic football factories with worthless degrees located in ****hole truck stop towns with level 7 hypothermia cold azz weather in the winter & helllike hot muggy humidity in the summer

lansing (along with tuscon, eugene, norman, lubbock, stillwater, manhattan kansas, etc) is NOT cali



50 year decision (for life after football so ur not tryna live off ur parents at age 30 or something)#
Shocky1
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cal's monster class official visits recruiting update (from the buc-ee's on ashby)


pro tip: all nite room service at the claremont (sign/charge everything to coach wilcox)#
Shocky1
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https://instagr.am/p/CKX7fG2jx4r
OFFICIAL CAL FOOTBALL 2026 RECRUIT QUESTIONNAIRE:

Wut's ur name?

Do u got a nickname or wut does ur moms call u?

Wut's ur GPA?
Note: if u got a **** GPA ur not going nowhere, do not continue completing this form unless ur willing to attend every class 5 minutes before it starts while sitting in the front row & also relentlessly work with the fabulous Athletic Study Center run by Tarik Glenn & Shocky's brah Dr. Kasra Sotudeh?

Wut's ur electronically timed 40 SPEED?
Note: if u got a **** 40 ur not going nowhere, do not continue completing this form

R u from Cali, Hawaii or Texas?

If ur from Texas wut is ur Buc-ee's membership #?

If ur from Hawaii wut is ur favorite poke bowl combination?

Is ur Dream School a low rent academic school in the Big 12 located in a truck stop town with lot lizards with CFM pumps & STDS?

How important is Berkeley's ranking as the #1 rated public school in the WORLD in ur final decision on a scale of 1 to 10?

Yes or No: R u aware that curvy brunette yoga females from academically mediocre schools wanna date & marry Cal, Stanford & Ivy Leagues when they enter the REAL WORLD that unremorsefully favors the well educated in building GENERATIONAL WEALTH?

Wut's ur favorite position?
Note: do NOT send any fotos

R u wanted on any felonies (wanted in 2 states, can't move wrong?) or do u got multiple baby mamas?

Do u luv rescue doggy dogs & do u help old women cross the street?

Do u got a membership at Modern Yoga?

When ur 30 years old do you wanna be building generational wealth like Cal, Stanford & Ivy League grads or do u wanna be Young, Dumb and Broke??



the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (including ur hometown)
Shocky1
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Shocky1
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^ fun fact: if u listen carefully u can hear shocky scream "wow, go bears!!" when ben drained this putt for a 61 at the renaissance club in scotland...just ask zinqin zhou about the positive monster energy when schulzie willed eric into a 5 birdie 67 at the 2025 ncca championship at la costa...and yeah michael kim wuz in a slump when shocky walked all 18 holes with him during the 1st round of this year's phoenix open which has turned around his career...funny moment when michael thanked on twitter his "gallery" for their support during this tournament when in actuality the only person walking all 18 holes with him wuz shocky

2025 canadian open: 3rd round update

ben an (65, tied for 9th): ben is playing flawless golf with no bogeys since the 17th hole on thursday in the opening round with back to back rounds of 64 & 65!!...an is averaging 321 yards on his drives & is hitting an unreal 85%+ of greens in regulation...let's ******* go, tomorrow ben!!
Shocky1
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the need for SPEED and high gpas!!#
Shocky1
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this is bare territory#

Shocky1
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Shocky1 said:

so here's shocky's 100% candid player personnel analysis, these are solely the monster's opinions & not those of the cal men's golf current/former coaching staff or collin morikawa/max homa/ben an/michael kim, got it??...it should also be pointed out that the team's golf roster size will be impacted by the house settlement & it's possible that a talented transfer deal will get worked out

the superstars:

ziqin "eric" zhou (will be a sophomore next season): the econ major got all the tools to be one of the nation's top 10 golfers, he tole me that collin has reached out to him by phone a couple of times...that kinda developmental mentorship advice/relationship from the world's #4 ranked golfer is priceless

xihuan chang (true freshman): the beijing china native got morikawa like credentials entering college with a top 4 finish at the us junior boy's & a top 32 at the us amateur (successfully competing at usga events which are prepared for championship golf is the true mark of a golfer's pedigree)...only red flag for the 5'11" xihuan is his slight weight of 143 lbs which can be addressed this fall in the s&c program at memorial stadium

solid with potential great upside:

charlie berridge (5th year senior): what can the 6'5" 211 lbs former ice hockey player/highest gpa student on the golf team do with his game without the relentless time demands of berkeley undergraduate studies??...berridge (his dad eric kindly invited me out to visit again his gatsby inspired timeless c&c brambles) tole me he gotta stretching routine but a yoga/meditation practice is the next step, got it charlie??



daniel heo (senior): the 6' 165 lbs econ major from cypress made huge developmental strides late in the season & would benefit from another 10-12 lbs of muscle this offseason

sihao cong (blueshirt sophmore): the 5'11" 155 lbs irvine native stood out this season & would benefit from another 10-15 lbs of muscle this offseason

charlie bundy (blueshirt junior): the personable william & mary transfer sat out this season while working on his game & studying for the haas biz ad school (tole me he will find out in july re: his application to haas)...mutiple sources tole me that charlie excelled in the qualifying rounds around the bay (including 3-4 rounds at shocky's old caddying grounds at the fabulous san francisco golf club)...bundy is actually 6'1" 148 lbs (not the 155 lbs listed on the roster bio), charlie gotta start measuring his daily protein grams intake like the vast majority of pga golfers (rory consumer 170 grams of protein a day, basically his body weight) & get himself up to 160-165 lbs before this fall while playing a rigorous summer amateur golf slate

unproven young talent:

matthew miyamoto & kai hirayama (sophmores unless they blueshirted): gotta work harder to get better, are they grinders??
zhenghei "richard" han (blueshirt freshman): see above, all 3 r undersized by asu golf standards (lean muscular 180-185 lbs)
trevor cox (true freshman): the 2025 commit from rancho santa fe hasn't achieved anything significant in junior golf, needs to work with a chip on his shoulder

2025 canadian open: 4th round update

ben an (66, tied for 6th): how far did the 6'2" 210 lbs byeong drive the ball today of the tee:

1st hole: 371 yards
2nd: 373 yards
3rd: 325 yards
5th: 319 yards
6th: 335 yards
8th: 299 yards
9th: 301 yards
10th: 266 yards (fairway wood)
12th: 315 yards
13th: 350 yards
15th: 309 yards
16th: 306 yards
17th: 309 yards (missed a 3 foot birdie putt after a brilliant approach iron)
18th: 299 yards (drove it into a fairway bunker which resulted in a costly bogey on the par 5)

weather note: it rained heavily during the 1st round in toronto, the fairways wuz NOT baked out

wut's ur point shocky??

championship college & professional golf is played by +1 athletic well constructed golfers, other than 6' 196 lbs zinqin zhou & 6'5" 211 lbs charlie berridge the current golf roster is undersized relative to the 8 teams that made it into match play at the 2025 ncca championship

in speaking with multiple players (and even a 2026 commit) nobody in the program is tracking daily protein grams...living in north scottsdale literally every of the 25+ current touring pros can tell u their daily protein grams intake as quickly as their ball/clubhead speed on trackman

coach wilson & coach ireland need to address this nutrition issue if the program intends to seriously compete for a ncca championship, golf in 2025 is a power game played by golfers that are maximizing their strength opportunities every day & protein grams is the metric (rory is very candid about consuming his 170 lbs body weight with daily 170 grams of protein)

being put together like shocky (who is lean like a feral doggy dog) is ******* great if ur goal is become a substitute teacher at modern yoga but no bueno if u wanna get PAID on the pga tour or win the united states amateur championship which will be held at the olympic club this summer

ADMINISTRATIVE NOTE: shocky has now posted 9 consecutive times & cannot post again on the monster thread at this time in order to remain in compliance with this board's rules & regulations, there needs to be more reader postings/engagement
NVBear78
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Go Bears!!! Great recruiting
Shocky1
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smart & tough 3.4 gpa sideline to sideline linebacker with a very good looking family!!#

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (including coors stadium)#
Shocky1
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Quote:


2026 6'3" 290 lbs agile warrior offensive lineman koloi filipo keli from farrington high school (honolulu)#


the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (for nfl ambitious & academically focused polynesians with a family environment)
KAAAAABBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMM!!!!!!!!

welcome to the family, koloi, coach famika like shocky is tired of our past undersized cal's not so MONSTER offensive lines

study hard, work hard in the s&c program, build lifelong friendships and achieve all ur dreams in berkeley!!


cal poly-berkeley=#1 ranked public university kinda close to diamond head (the monster don't got no good geography maps reading skills or something such as and so forth so we can build up our future)

Shocky1
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look mr tofi, shocky is gonna get u an extra key to haas pavillion so u can get ur shots up on the mornings of the tofi boyz (including ernie, gotta gain some muscle) fall gamedays but let's be ******* real here, ok, coffee is for losers!!

did u learn how to swim at garfield when u wuz 5??

fun fact: back in the day when mutiple mcdonalds all americans roamed the floor of a sold out haas pavillion, shocky built up a strong relationship with the winningest (almost 90% victories) college basketball coach in the history of the sport, berkeley grad justin labagh of city college of san francisco...justin once tole me that his 4 state championships wuz not won during the season but during the summer months on the recruiting trail...one of my happiest memories of serving then as cal men's basketball 1st general manager wuz attending a rams game to scout 7' sami elaraky (of egyptian descent & native of denmark) tryna buy a $10 tix at will call only to find out that justin had left me a FREE tix in an envelope addressed to "Bill Schulz, Cal Basketball Staff"...john, would love to talk hoops with u this fall at memorial stadium

Shocky1
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Shocky1
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3.8 gpa khalil sanogo's collegiate announcement date: july 6th
Shocky1
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trusted cal football godfather (play gumshoe theme muzak in the background) kevin kennedy is a big fan of cal football chief of staff/berkeley grad andrew mcgraw as the next cal athletic director!!

Love Andrew McGraw. He's outstanding on every level. After 27 years in football, there's nothing about Cal he doesn't know and the number of heads that would blow up with his ascension down in California Hall would be worth the price of admission by itself. But he'd have to want the job and I don't think he does.

this really isn't a complicated mystery sherlock, there's really only one path forward & it's NOT thru some backwater ****hole truck stop town with a lousy as **** non academic college that prepares its players to become waffle house dishwashers or wal mart loading dock employees when they're 30 years old, it's elementary coach watson, got it??

https://instagr.am/p/BK1PpkdD858


VOTE for andrew mcgraw for athletic director (don't be a dumb azz)!!#
Shocky1
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KAAAAABBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!

emmanuel morgan has been going to cal games to watch his godbrother jeremiah hunter & is acutely aware of the importance of setting urself up for life after football!!



yeah ej weighs only 150+ lbs (which is around wut desean jackson weighed when he arrived in berkeley) but he got something to prove

4.3 gpa burner with sub 4.5 SPEED & kick returning upside (this prospect is MONSTER endorsed)!!#

Shocky1
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KAAAAABBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!


not gonna lie to u, this graphic of frank (who unlike coach browning got good hair) & his moms is hitting me hard, we wuz both raised by tigers moms that tole us that we wuz unconditionally loved & that we could do anything in life that we put our mind too (and shocky believed her)

my moms grew up poor as **** on the 2nd floor above a dry cleaner in san francisco, she wuz a 1st college generation grad in her family earning a berkeley degree that wuz paid for by schollys & working a couple of jobs to pay her bills...she went on to become the largest drug dealer in nor cal (ok, the director of pharmaceutical services for kaiser permanente)!!

a key factor in this commitment wuz the recent staff hire of nfl standout/oregon state grad stephen paea, we can anticipate a continued upward trajectory in recruiting poly defensive lineman to berkeley

frank, let me tell u one of life's greatest truths, the day u (high school 4.0 gpa) walk across the stage at memorial stadium to accept ur berkeley diploma is gonna be the most SPECIAL day of ur moms life as she bathes in the glory of a beautiful son, u feel me??

no cap



frank fanua jr is a mama's boy (me too)!!#

https://instagr.am/p/DIFOMBQJz7K
_____________________________________________________

house settlement implications: with respects to roster sizes college football program max rosters are gonna increase from 85 to 105 and furthermore as a part of a compromise with the judge (a berkeley grad) programs will be able to honor current schollys to graduation (nobody is gonna get run off) in settling into the scholly cap

right now the bears got 15 commitments plus 2 silent commitments...shocky now believes the 2026 high school class will be 23-25 bears as the program pivots to DEVELOPING future impact starters (and berkeley grads) vs tryna buy portal transfer talent for a season...and no, academic admission requirements have NOT been lowered in berkeley
GCGBear
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I am not worried about taking more HS recruits. Hopefully it builds a more stable program. We, like all schools, have more leave each year than we expect. If we have more HS recruits it could mean we need less transfers and can go after fewer, high impact guys in the portal.
DaveK180
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No lower academic requirements? If so, securing the high level transfers and hs recruits recently is even more impressive. By the way, two things I love are golf and Cal recruiting so your thread is must read for me.
Shocky1
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cgc & dave, 100%, love the pivoting to the smart strategy to go YOUNG in building the roster with high gpa/academic ambition ballers & then DEVELOPING that talent to become impact starters (and berkeley grads) with NFL upside instead of tryna buy transfer portal guys for 9 months who bid out their services after every season kinda like a janitorial services rfp

yeah thinking outside the box is the norm in berkeley, collin is gonna hit driver on the unreal par 3 8th hole at oakmont this week & shocky knows that clothes r for losers!!





cal poly-berkeley (got some key official visitors this weekend)#
Shocky1
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3.4 gpa TAKER with quick twitch +1 athleticism (will not visit north carolina)#
Shocky1
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cal's monster class recruiting update:

with the 3rd & final major official recruiting weekend coming up at the claremont a KEY visitor will be mobile 6'5" 305 lbs offensive lineman kamo'i huihui-white from kailua hawaii & fabled powerhouse st louis high school

kamo'i is NOT a dumb azz, he got a 3.9 gpa!!

trust me, polys don't wanna live in either ******* freezing azz nebraska with level 7 hypothermia or attend an elitist white preppy smu with smug azz low gpa daddys boyz who fathers own fracking conglomerates that are subtly/overtly racist (prediction: ponys commit dakota dickson will be in the transfer portal within the next 18 months)

https://instagr.am/p/BFSAbu4LRPA

cal poly-berkeley=the poi poi MELTING pot (not cooked 400% fahrenheit)#
Shocky1
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Shocky1 said:


2026 4.1 gpa 6'4" 220 lbs te/lb rocky cummings from legoland high school in carlsbad#

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (including the linguine con vongole at vigilucci's on state street)
cal's monster class recruiting update:

4.1 gpa rocky cummings is still gonna visit visit berkeley despite his legoland high school senior thesis project of engineering a 68,368 lego reproduction of memorial stadium getting destroyed by them low gpa pierpoint rats surf gang vandalizing this 18 month meticulous labor of love project

ay caramba, life is NOT linear, some bad characters got cold hearts



Shocky1
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Quote:


2026 3.0 gpa 6'3" 290 lbs defensive tackle kingston "lucky" schirmer from corona centennial#

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (just ask breezy)

https://instagr.am/p/DDLhgR4y37i
BearGoggles
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GCGBear said:

I am not worried about taking more HS recruits. Hopefully it builds a more stable program. We, like all schools, have more leave each year than we expect. If we have more HS recruits it could mean we need less transfers and can go after fewer, high impact guys in the portal.
With the House Settlement capping "NIL salaries" (and by extension reducing the motivation for young players to move on to chase $$) and the covid year players (finally) running out of eligibility, I expect to see schools swing back to taking more HS players. Seems like the Moneyball approach.
Shocky1
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https://instagr.am/p/DGLrDKAvwiH
googles, agreed, the cal football program needs to target academically focused 2026 high school prospects that VALUE a berkeley degree (that will not skip town for a worthless michigan state payday/level 7 hypothermia) with DEVELOPMENTAL UPSIDE instead of tryna bring in mercenary ballers with mickey mouse gpas that don't got no loyalty to **** during their 9 months in the big city

89Bear
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Shocky, how do you rate Oakmont as a course?
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