Cal is set to hire Tampa Bay Buccaneers pass game specialist/assistant QB coach Jordan Somerville as its offensive coordinator, sources tell @CBSSports.
Has been with Tampa since 2023, coaching players like Baker Mayfield. Before Tampa, worked at the college level at Oregon. pic.twitter.com/MDOKhhUUbx
while this is a surprising decision shocky thinks the current nfl experience with the tampa bay buccaneers coupled with tosh's direct working relationship at oregon makes jordan sommerville (29 year old asu grad) a solid hire as the next bear's offensive coordinator
it's very clear that tosh is hiring likable extroverted personalities like him that can relentlessly RECRUIT!!
of course cal's expired tv "fans" will complain about his lack of experience but that's how you end up with ******* alcoholic retreads like musgrave & spavital who have worked at gazillions of places until people get tired of their ****
sommerville is a fresh face with a relentless work ethic reputation & will be mentored by rolo in a collegiate football profession that's moving towards younger coaches due to the non stop recruiting/player retention requirements in 2026
let's ******* go, jordan, welcome to berkeley (with the cal's monster class stamp of approval)!!
Video: Todd Bowles says Jordan Somerville will stay with the Bucs through the end of their season and says Cal is getting a smart young coach to run their offense. pic.twitter.com/oC3D3sN7Ts
It's been brought to our attention that this is not Jordan Somerville and is instead Jordan Baker from The CW's hit drama "All American". The editorial board at CalCentel apologizes for this oversight and we welcome Coach Somerville and his family to the 510. #GoBearshttps://t.co/cBOem4I0TL
1) jaron keawe sagapolutele 2) devin brown 3) nainoa lopes 4) who gives a **** (sorry jerry, pass me a pork dumpling, ok??) 5) who gives a **** (brah, nobody gives 2 ***** re: ur political views, got it??) 6) who gives a **** (kinda funny ur a better golfer than a bears qb1) 7) who gives a **** 8) who gives a **** 9) who gives a **** 10) who gives a ****
dang, woof woof woof i cry, modern yoga has taught shocky to live & celebrate the current ephemeral moments of our lives (not looking backwards or too far into the future)
https://instagr.am/p/DSYfTOOjWSf ^ why the **** would anybody with a high gpa/options in life intentionally decide to live in miserable freezing azz level 7 hypothermia cold weather??
don't be a dumb azz (life is NOT linear)# ^ fun fact: shocky pays bills & **** thru his multiple side gigs/hustles including writing chinese fortune cookie inserts
https://calegends.com/donation/ Do it now. Text every Cal fan you know, give them the link, tell them how much you gave, and ask them to text every Cal fan they know and do the same.
The #1 ranked player in Washington, 4⭐️ LB Brayden Platt has arrived and is primed for a big role on Team Makai. #PolyBowl2K24 🤙🏽🌴 pic.twitter.com/Wj91oT8Uql
2026 cal football portal transfer recruiting update:
shocky just flew from miami back to the desert sitting next to someone (not taylor, haha) with 1st hand knowledge of the situation who tole the monster that oregon freshman linebacker 6'2" 245 lbs brayden platt from yelm washington with a laser timed 4.64 SPEED is considering entering the transfer portal & transferring to cal
platt would be an immediate IMPACT backer in berkeley!!
He was 3rd sting at Maryland, starter Malik Washington is a talented freshman and a local kid.
Some say that without him, there is no Heismendoza!
Give to Cal Legends!
https://calegends.com/donation/ Do it now. Text every Cal fan you know, give them the link, tell them how much you gave, and ask them to text every Cal fan they know and do the same.
Source: Cal is set to hire Keith Bhonapha as running backs coach. Bhonapha grew up near Cal in Oakland and has coached RBs at Michigan State, Oregon State, Boise State and Washington. pic.twitter.com/DhscG6phO6
real talk: massive addition to the staff in coaching up (catching the ball will be a point of focus) the running back room with a track record of NFL development and future recruiting the islands (hawaii grad with rolo back in the day) along with trusting relationships with both berkeley student athletes & their bearent(s)!!
WELCOME back to oaktown (the home of the jet), keith!!
2026 acc opponent update: right now the monster got the roadie to nc state as the #2 toughest game on the bears schedule but potentially losing both rb1 (hollywood rushed for 939 yards in 2025) plus qb1 (is cj bailey gonna return to his hometown miami & take the hurricane bags??) would cause a reranking with the wolfpack's offensive taking some irreplaceable hits
with the brutal byu roadtrip gonzo now, the 2026 california golden bear season is shaping up to be ******* EPIC!!
what game(s) are u gonna attend in person (the bears need ur gameday energy)??#
Are my attendance locks. @UNLV also a high probability.
Give to Cal Legends!
https://calegends.com/donation/ Do it now. Text every Cal fan you know, give them the link, tell them how much you gave, and ask them to text every Cal fan they know and do the same.
hollywood, da bares r gonna ball out at the NFL allegiant stadium, let's stay in touch re: rounds together at shadow creek & the summit (morikawa's club)
yeah the raiderettes all move like modern yoga alums or something (ok, asu strippers)
mailbag update: shocky just got the following message from rolo in response to my semi friendly inquiry why the **** would his 3.9 gpa son daniel turn down a harvard degree for a ******* san jose state degree??
I am fine except when you bother me in the middle of the day while I'm busy watching cut ups (see below of their disguised dime packages) for our opening game of the 2026 season at a SOLD OUT Memorial Stadium vs UCLA.
Anyways as a former Marin Catholic QB1 and a Hawaii Legend (unlike u) I'm qualified to tell you that my son is a better NFL prospect than the former Wildcats QB1 Jared Goff, got it??
Seriously not all SJS grads end up working doing guided tours at the Winchester Mystery Fun House when they're 30 years old.
And just stop with the annoying dumb as **** bribes telling me that if I will call PITCHOUTS on the edges in wide open space for Kendrick Raphael in our upcoming bowl game that you will buy me a FREE 100 round golf coupon book plus unlimited meals and drinks at San Geronimo Golf Club, ok?
I'm not stupid brah, no wonder Moani dumped ur sorry broken down azz but thank you again for conferring upon me an honorary Berkeley degree.
bows d-line coach throwing shade at cal poly-berkeley!!
r u ready for 60 minutes of VIOLENT physical football on december 24th (or is this gonna be another ******* san diego state candy azz soft pregame mentally unprepared 0-34 beatdown brah)??
wut did ur tiger moms (poly or not) instill/teach u growing up??
this is an IMPORTANT moment in time for berkeley, embrace this opportunity to represent something bigger than urself
jahlil is NOT a dumb azz, he got a 3.75 gpa at lincoln high in san diego playing with unreal SPEED in the t-rex dominated legoland conference!!
the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the WORLD (get it ******* rite, tosh, otherwise ur gonna be on shocky's **** list like jay & jenny)
jahlil is NOT a dumb azz, he got a 3.75 gpa at lincoln high in san diego playing with unreal SPEED in the t-rex dominated legoland conference!!
the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the WORLD (get it ******* rite, tosh, otherwise ur gonna be on shocky's **** list like jay & jenny)
Besides tackling, I would also not a player on my team who left right when we are getting ready to play for a championship. Or can he still play after entering the portal? I'm old so I have a lot of questions and rules.
1) jaron keawe sagapolutele 2) devin brown 3) nainoa lopes 4) who gives a **** (sorry jerry, pass me a pork dumpling, ok??) 5) who gives a **** (brah, nobody gives 2 ***** re: ur political views, got it??) 6) who gives a **** (kinda funny ur a better golfer than a bears qb1) 7) who gives a **** 8) who gives a **** 9) who gives a **** 10) who gives a ****
dang, woof woof woof i cry, modern yoga has taught shocky to live & celebrate the current ephemeral moments of our lives (not looking backwards or too far into the future)
https://instagr.am/p/DSYfTOOjWSf ^ why the **** would anybody with a high gpa/options in life intentionally decide to live in miserable freezing azz level 7 hypothermia cold weather??
don't be a dumb azz (life is NOT linear)# ^ fun fact: shocky pays bills & **** thru his multiple side gigs/hustles including writing chinese fortune cookie inserts
Joe Roth, Steve Barkowski, Dave Barr, Craig Morten, Joe Kapp, Pat Barnes and Paws have a rebuttal. And 2 more years from now move over everyone for JSK.
Can’t express in words what this place meant to me! Met some of my best friends and built amazing relationships. I’m super excited to be allowed to finish out the season with the team in Hawaii! Let’s get this W. https://t.co/gIIZdiv20g
real talk: hawaii's nainoa lopes is the future qb1 in berkeley
cal poly-berkeley=the 9th island
dls, whether players are allowed to play in bowl games is handled on a case by case scenario & usually is decided upon the respect levels flowing both ways between the player & the staff...r u a great teammate??
jahlil left the ducks fb program in november, he's not gonna be allowed to suit up for oregon's cfb playoff run
ej took the news well when transparently tole that incoming freshman nainoa lopes is the bears qb1 of the future (would be awesome if he wuz coached up by both jks & devin brown next season while blue shirting) & will be traveling with his teammates to honolulu
schulzie is hopeful that when he finds out the interest level from other schools in the january transfer portal window that the 3.5 gpa caminong will decide to return to campus as a regular student & complete his berkeley degree which would be a much better generational wealth building 50 year decision than competing to become the qb1 at utah tech of something
https://instagr.am/p/B6tLOv_n7UQ wifey, to be honest with u, any cal football list that don't got doms at #1 is a totally bull**** list (kinda like any golf architecture list that includes cartball only housing developments shady canyon or pelican hills)
asu wideout jordyn tyson is declaring for the nfl draft but the press release don't mention he's flunking out in tempe just like his brother jaylon (who honestly should've never been given a silver bullet admissions exception) did in berkeley en route to the nba
athletic family with ZERO interest in academics and reading books & **** like that
tosh is going hard on building a staff with nfl experience, bay area connections & youthful RECRUITING upside!!
https://instagr.am/p/DRktRgKD-vR shocky thinks 30 year old current minnesota vikings safeties coach (worked with cam bynum), usc standout with both undergraduate & master's degrees & delasalle all american michael hutchings who wuz born in san francisco got unreal upside in returning to the bay as the bears next defensive coordinator
Minnesota Vikings safeties coach Michael Hutchings has accepted the defensive coordinator job at Cal, sources tell @CBSSportspic.twitter.com/ji1w1XLeIG
cal's monster class OFFICIAL 2026 cal football schedule ranking (based upon rosters today):
1) smu (in dallas): well coached physical team with an elite qb1 kevin jennings who is a top 3 qb in the acc...rb1 tj harden is outta eligibility but the backups actually got more breakaway speed than him...defensively the graduations of leading tacklers s1s ahmaad moses (91 tackles) & isaiah nwokobia (80 tackles) could be an issue for the ponys...a plus for the bears is that low key racist smu (which dakota dickson is gonna find out about this summer) is not supported by the dallas community outside of its grads which means the gamedays really aren't that loud/hostile as gerald j ford stadium got more luxury boxes/suites than probably any other college stadium which puts out a country/petroleum club cocktail hour vibe (that's actually kinda disinterested in the game going on in the background)
2) north carolina state (in raleigh): qb1 cj bailey (2884 yards passing with an unreal 69.6% completion accuracy) is a top 3 acc qb/low round nfl prospect for the wolfpack (7-5) but the miami native is gonna be tampered/solicited by hometown miami to return to south beach for his final season...this ranking could change with the early january transfer portal window...leading tackler backer caden fordham (an unreal 143 tackles this season) & nfl prospect tight end justin joly are outta eligibility and rb1 hollywood smothers & wr1 terrell anderson are in the transfer portal
When asked about his future, CJ Bailey said he’s just thinking about the upcoming game.
After that, he’s going to “go home and talk to my mom and my dad and enjoy my time off.” pic.twitter.com/gjegpJNTSw
3) clemson (at memorial stadium): elite talent at every position but thankfully not at qb1 with cade klubnik (very good, not great) graduating (qb2 chrstopher vizzina passed for 406 yards) & dabo is not a fan of the transfer portal...4 juniors have declared for the nfl draft: d-linemen peter woods & tj parker, corner back avieon terrell & wide receiver antonio williams (55 catches for 604 yards)... fully expect tigers (7-5) fans to travel in large numbers to the left coast for this acc battle royale
4) virginia (in charlottesville): yeah the cardiac kids cavs wuz 10-3 in 2025 but scoring points next season is gonna require an infusion of new talent with ice in his veins qb1 chandler morris (the paws of back in the day), 1000 yard rb j'mari taylor, wr1 trell harris (56 receptions for 809 yards) & pretty much the entire starting offensive line all outta eligibility along with edge defender daniel rickert (6.5 sacks)
5) pittsburgh (at memorial stadium): the panthers (8-4) return a lotta young talent on offense but the d gave up 30+ points 6 times during 2025, let's drop 50 in the revenge game (shocks is still in therapy from watching the ****** up last minute missed field goal attempt at acrisure stadium that his guy mateen bhaghani would've drilled thru the ******* goalposts) at memorial stadium
6) unlv (october 3rd in las vegas): rebels qb1 anthony colandrea is a threat both with his arm (3050 yards passing) & with his legs and rb1 jaiden thomas (985 yards) is explosive but gonna miss nfl upside senior wideout jaden bradley (54 receptions for 869 yards) & the d (leading tackler with 103 marsel mcduffie is gonna be outta eligibility) gave up 30+ points 6 times in a successful 2025 (10-3)... fully expect the bears faithful (not the expired cal tv "fans") to travel in large numbers to check out allegiant stadium & cheer on jks in vegas baby!!
7) wake forest (at memorial stadium): the 8-4 deacons exceeded expectations in 2025 but will be without rb1 demond claiborne & qb1 robbie ashford when they travel 3000 miles to the left coast in 2026
8) virginia tech (at memorial stadium): the temps in berkeley won't be in the 30s like blacksburg & the hokies (3-9) won't be able to run the same ******* option play 20+ times in the 2nd half without any ******* adjustments by the bears d staff...james franklin is expected to bring in florida transfer dj lagway as his qb1
9) stanford (at memorial stadium): tosh is gonna make sure the bears are emotionally ready to play the 2026 big game against a rival opponent (4-8) that lacks offensive firepower other than te1 sam roush
10) syracuse (in syracuse): the 3-9 orange got the worst offense in the acc in 2025, unless a legit qb1 is signed in the january transfer portal they are gonna struggle again moving the ball/scoring points but road games are always tricky/dangerous propositions
11) ucla (september 5th at memorial stadium): the opener for both teams if properly marketed will be a SELL OUT!!...the bruins lose most of their 2 deeps for both the offensive & defensive lines on a 3-9 2025 squad, if the bears can bury them westwood could be looking at a 10+ loss 2026 ****show
12) wagner seahawks (september 19th at memorial stadium): 5-7 against dogfood opponents in 2025, whose gonna be the bears qb2 next season??
what do you think, any adjustments to the ever ending games that you play??
wolfpack running back room: with rb1 hollywood smothers (939 yards declaring yesterday for the transfer portal/nfl draft) rb2 jayden scott (108 yards on 19 carries including multiple broken tackles) played like a 2026 1000+ yard rusher...the pack's deep rb room provides context to why cal's rb1 kendrick raphael opted to head to berkeley to purse a potential nfl career & a world class berkeley education
wolfpack d: when the bears travel to raleigh in 2026 they will not face all american linebacker caden fordham (13 tackles vs the tigers & an unreal 143 tackles for the senior who like evan weaver may not project at the next level)...nc state's best returning defender is devon marshall "island" who is a lockdown corner who got a ncca leading 16th defended pass this afternoon
pack o-line: this well coached room graduates 2 starters but the real 2026 impact will be determined as all acc redshirt junior left tackle jaccarius peak makes a decision on whether to declare for the nfl (is projected as a mid round draft pick selection)...tight end justin joly (rated by mel kiper jr as the 2nd best tight end/fullback in college football) is outta eligibility & heading to the senior bowl
cj bailey: the biggest non cal football news to follow right now is wut the **** is cj gonna do, the 6'6" 215 lbs +1 athletic nfl prospect gotta lotta options!!
6' 180 lbs defensive back jeovanni henley is NOT a dumb azz, he got a 3.3 gpa at serra high school in the highly competitive wcal conference (1st team in 2025)
the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the WORLD (and a 45 minute drive for the fam/friends on fall gamedays at memorial stadium)
how the **** are worthless bureaucratic co athletic director ****tards jay larsen & jennifer simon-o'neil still employed each at just south of $500,000, wut a ****ing waste of money!!
https://instagr.am/p/DRqtE0UCIdC real talk: if cal rb1 kendrick raphael can improve his 40 SPEED this off season working with the s&c program in conjunction with new running back coach keith bhonapha (skyline high school) then he gotta opportunity to lead the acc in rushing in 2026 with 1500+ yards & improve his NFL draft stock!!
https://instagr.am/p/BsjbzYxBlDq dave, the monster has not heard of any key players from his old school opting out (but he could just be uninformed) of the bowl game but did hear that doms electronically lasered 40 time wuz not the same as her 40 hand held time which is concerning to nfl scouts as is her daily consumption of copious amounts of coffee or something
https://instagr.am/p/BsjbzYxBlDq dave, the monster has not heard of any key players from his old school opting out (but he could just be uninformed) of the bowl game but did hear that doms electronically lasered 40 time wuz not the same as her 40 hand held time which is concerning to nfl scouts as is her daily consumption of copious amounts of coffee or something
Would not surprise me if both CBs (Masses and Austin) sit this one out. Or play maybe a series. Uluave would not surprise me either.
There are also likely a few players that intend to enter the portal that may not wish to risk injury.
