Shocky1 said:

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Shocky1 said:

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Dear Shocky,

How are you?

I am fine.

I'm not sure why you think that my principled stance in operating 30+ sports teams is "financially not sustainable" and moving "the athletic department on the path towards financial bankruptcy," do you have any experience in analyzing financial statements or what?

Anyways, I'm reaching out to you with the exciting opportunity to be one of our $1,000,000 lead donors for my newly proposed women's Quidditch program.

Unlike Track & Basketball, our Quidditch program will be targeting the descendants (children & grandchildren) of the wealthiest families in the world to ensure White girls from privilege are given every opportunity for preferential academic admission into Berkeley. Our targeted recruiting base will be the primary benefactors of the Louvre and the Metropolitan Museum of Art. Our senior women's administrator will be extensively traveling to Bel Air, Moscow, Monte Carlo, Lausanne and the Canary Islands to make sure this happens, she is highly effective in this role in working with highly appreciative high net worth White families.

In that there are not currently any Quidditch programs in North America, our Bears will be competing in the European Jet Set League. We will work towards cost savings and be responsible stewards of financial matters by asking the team at times to travel by commercial flights and occasionally lodging at only 3 star hotels that do not offer spa services.

To ensure Title IX compliance and access to equal facilities, I've communicated to Coach Wilcox that the football program will not be allowed to practice anymore on Tuesdays and Thursdays at Memorial Stadium because of time restraints which would unfairly hinder the Quidditch program. Furthermore, I've asked Markeisha to hire an 11th Communications Assistant Director to cover the Quidditch program to ensure they receive the same media experience as the football team. Would it not be unfair to Jules Von Fustenberg III to not receive the same interviews and media attention for her capturing the golden snitch against the St Moritz Trust Funding Oligopolists as Jaydn Ott rushing for 179 yards & 4 touchdowns vs the USC Trojans?

We will be realistic and not expect the Quidditch program to be competitive for at least a decade because of Covid 19 limitations. Also many of our student athletes have other important summertime athletic endeavor responsibilities including but not limited to the World Parasailing Championships in Maui, the South America Polo Cup in Buenos Aires and the Shinnecock/Maidstone Interclub Golf Matches.

Shocky, let's make this happen! Please let me know your thoughts and if you're already on board please find attached a stamped self addressed envelope for your generous donation of $1,000,000.

Go Bears!

Best regards,

James Arthur Knowlton, Athletic Director

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consider the following "knowlton notes":

*****the hiring of the unlikeable white mark fox over the black travis decruire because he felt "more comfortable" with him not recognizing that the predominantly black players & future recruits might feel the opposite to be true...anybody think the guys who didn't want to listen to fox in this lineup: point guard darius mcceil (smu), shooting guard matt bradley (san diego state), small forward justice seuing (ohio state), power forward andre kelly (santa barbara) & center connor vanover (arkansas) wouldn't be a better option than this year's starting lineup?

*****upon meeting knowlton at the oregon state football game in corvallis, he promised to check into why cal's monster class with it's 5,000,000+ views including mcdonald all american high school readers jaylen brown, Ivan rabb, caleb swanigan, jabari bird & marcus lee was terminated & to see if it couldn't come back to life...got an email from jim a couple months later, he asked around & nobody knew nothing...the shockster hasn't donated a single dollar to cal athletics since that email (my 50 yard line perch was prepaid until my death the day esp tixs went on sale back in the day), my fundraising endeavors here in maricopa county for them rescue dogs & cats is not mismanaging/wasting donor contributions, **** the red baron

*****knowlton allowed fox with his 1st staff to waste hundreds of thousands of dollars in hiring his crony old friend the equally unlikeable trent johnson as a basketball staff bureaucrat instead of an aggressive young black recruting dynamo like my former floor seat guest theo robertson

*****mark fox & his 3 assistants are the oldest coaching staff in d1 men's college basketball at 200 years, recruiting is a young man's 24/7/365 game...to his credit coach wilcox has been transitioning more & more recruting responsibilities to guys under 30 years of age

*****jaylen brown told me that he tried to explain the benefits/importance of a black father figure/mentor to jim at a football game last season but that he didn't think knowlton really understood what he was talking about, the next bullet point confirms jb's message was lost in translation

*****knowlton's decision to extend fox's contract from 2024 to 2025 is arguably the dumbest azz decision in the history of cal athletics or maybe even the university

*****there is zero chance that knowlton is gonna raise the $80,000,000+ (the true cost is closer to $125,000,000 regardless of the general contractor in the design build) that is necessary to build the practice facility because of his insistence that it be built to accommodate multiple olympic sports when in reality is should be just a simple basketball only facility which is the practice at other pac 12 campuses...what was 6 years ago a $15,000,000-$18,000,000 basketball facility with doug goldman on board for a $10,000,000 lead donation is truly knowlton's folly that is now jim's castle in the sand (complete with architect renderings that show weight lifting/nutrition on the 1st floor, men's basketball on the 2nd floor, women's basketball on the 3rd floor & gymnastics/volleyball on the 4th floor)

*****knowlton's chief of staff jennifer simon-o'neil is evil as ****, back when i was around there were multiple coaches in multiple sports that all knew that teri mckeever was abusing her student athletes toward suicidal thoughts and that she was 100% enabled by simon-o'neil...the ad's legal defense strategy that they "didn't know" is not gonna fly under closer scrutiny/depositions and it's gonna cost realistically tens of millions of dollars to pay out the future lawsuits...saying "go bears" to the families of the impacted swimmers is just part of jim's tone deaf not reading the room just like not realizing that an overwhelming majority of cal fans don't really care about sports beyond football & men's basketball

*****not that anybody cares outsides of the families of those student athletes but the vast majority of the cal's women sport teams under simon-o'neil either finished 12th last season or are currently 12th in the current pac 12 standings...she is not only evil but also incompetent & in my opinion will be a focal point of a future varsity blue's investigation (just like the one that starred the crooked azz usc women's sports administrator) into cal's women's athletics (check out the affluent hometowns of the cal women's crew & field hockey teams who receive preferred academic admissions treatment into berkeley)...when i sent an email to cal's compliance team this summer with these concerns they didn't respond to me but rather beth set up a conference call with me to discuss this & other concerns...what collegiate compliance team in the in the united states of america doesn't respond to written concerns of impropriety from alums?

*****knowlton's blaming the vast majority of the cal teams losing records on covid (his often repeated mantra all teams are "back at zero, all momentum lost") kinda reminds me of the what's under the shell con game played by hustlers on the streets of new york city to the naive as ****

*****the premium donor & sales director matthew hornerkamp has never once talked/communicated to me to see if as a former floor seat donor would i be interested in attending a cal basketball game...ima still in touch with all of my recruits, ivan rabb told me this summer he would love to sit on the floor with me in my old seats directly across from the opposing team's head coach (criminal dana altman, rapist enabler steve alford & the donut boy of tuscon) to watch the squad's current dragons...maybe matthew will reach out to me & make that happen

*****the chief marketing & communications officer makeisha everett was hired despite never working on the west coast & never working for an organization that has ever sold a football ticket...there is no tangible plan in place to target former oakland raiders fans to experience cal football or priced out golden state warrior families to experience cal basketball...maekeisha oversees a bureaucratically bloated 10 person communications department which could be rightsized to 2-3 if bears coaches outside of football & basketball would just write their game day stories/player profiles...in a conference call this summer with beth tafolla-voetsch (who is very good in her professional responsibilities) & cfo tom lowry which included this topic, lowry told me that knowlton wants athletes in every sport to get the "same media recognition and experience" as football players...cannot make this **** up

*****berkeley right now has a record number of 1st in family enrolled in college students (which is a beautiful thing), a significant majority of them are from extremely low socioeconomic backgrounds...these students cannot afford the $100 dollar season pass...the decision to end the free student tixs which i battled for with the staff back in the day means that there will be an entire decade of cal students from poor families that will never attend a football or basketball game during their time in berkeley...and when they graduate (and some of them will undoubtedly will become titans of wall street, silicon valley, etc), they will never attend a cal football or basketball game as an adult because the gameday experience was never imprinted on them...when they get donation requests from the athletic dept, they gonna delete them in half a second...part of jim knowlton's legacy is gonna be tens of thousands of students who never experienced the magic of cal football or basketball and that's really really sad

*****the above bullet point is already adversely impacting student attendance...what are current season tix sales numbers (including & excluding students) for men's basketball 2022/2023 season?

*****knowlton has also rerouted critical dollars from the football & men's basketball program by hiring a diversity officer in dr ty-ron douglas when in philosophy every cal coach should be a diversity advocate, hiring a bureaucrat for hundreds of thousands of dollars is not the solution...my friend calalumnus (who is black) has correctly pointed out that as berkeley is the epicenter of the civil right & free speech movements that this is an embarrassment to the university of california, berkeley

*****cfo tom lowry told me he was previously in finances at the air force academy, his anti cal football bias is obvious within 5 minutes of talking to him...lowry in concert with knowlton is moving the cal athletic department towards bankruptcy with their unchecked spending (gotta focus on the construction of that sand volleyball facility) & he told me they are willing to borrow money from the central campus in loans that will never be financially possible to be repaid but they both gonna be retired by then

*****multiple fans who attended last saturday's pregame cal alum get together in boulder have told me that knowlton once again misread the room and told the assembled crowd that he's never going to make his student athletes travel back to the east coast on a weekly basis which this is not only factually inaccurate but also caused them to believe that knowlton isn't trying to get cal admitted into the big 10

jim knowlton is putting the cal athletic department on a clear cut path towards bankruptcy (the next chancellor after the benevolent christ is not realistically gonna be as financially supportive of sports & that's when the current $30,000,000 institutional support subsidy is gonna go away, that's when the massive cuts are gonna happen) with his quest to oversee 30+ teams that are financially unsustainable and that draw resources away from the football & men's basketball programs

if jim was an honourable man he would resign for putting the department's future in harm's way

real talk#

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Chapman_is_Gone said:

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Apologies to all for an off-topic post here on a football board.

Shockey,

The wax replica of Morticia Addams had disappeared from the Atlantic City wax museum. Is that woman you're with available to stand in?

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