cal's monster offensive line

1,524,845 Views | 9937 Replies | Last: 7 hrs ago by wifeisafurd
Shocky1
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ur correct joegeo, will edit my post to reflect 1 year of remaining eligiblity
https://meangreensports.com/sports/football/roster/chandler-rogers/6055

2018: mansfield high school (made academic honor roll)
2019 (did not play): southern miss
2020 (covid year, don't count against eligibility): blinn junior college
2021: university of louisiana monroe
2022: university of louisiana monroe
2023: north texas
2024 (grad transfer): cal
DurantAve
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Shocky1
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^ durant, thx for posting, this guy is ******* unreal with his +1 athleticism at 6'6"...if he can improve his mechanics he will be the next kap

so glad taylen green is going to arkansas & NOT auburn
chezzers
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Do you see Rogers being brought in to push for the starting job or to be a solid #2 behind Mendoza?
Big C
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chezzers said:

Do you see Rogers being brought in to push for the starting job or to be a solid #2 behind Mendoza?

I think both. No doubt Mendoza is penciled in as the starter. But they probably told Rogers that he is welcome to win the spot, if he is up to it. I think this is about as good as we can do, given Mendoza looks really solid.

Just had a horrible thought: Mendoza wouldn't be leaving, would he? Unlikely, but I bet he has had overtures.
Shocky1
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chezzers, nando has certainly won the starting position for 2024 with his play on the field & his leadership in the locker room but football is a very violent sport & chandler rogers wuz one of the most productive qbs in college football in 2023 with 3,382 passing yards, 29 touchdown passes vs only 5 interceptions & a highly accurate 62.2% completion ratio...so to answer ur question, chandler will push nando for qb1

the program now got 2 high level 2024 spring ball quarterbacks who are gonna be ready to compete in the exciting inaugural 2024 acc season, it would be ideal if true freshman ej caminong can develop next fall as a blueshirt without burning a year of eligibility

https://instagr.am/p/C0FO98zuZe_
Shocky1
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https://instagr.am/p/CdoEAm8lf5j
big c, nando is a now a fellow classmate of mine in the haas biz school, the nation's #1 ranked undergraduate biz program which is worth maybe tens of millions of dollars over a lifetime

there is ZERO chance nando is gonna walk away from that degree unless harvard offers him a full ride/acceptance to the harvard law school & a guaranteed future seat on the supreme court of the united states of america, got it?

shocky's amigo de biscayne bay (where the cuban gentlemen sleep all day) is all about the academics at the #1 RANKED PUBLIC UNIVERSITY IN THE WORLD

cap
Shocky1
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berkeley admissions: it is significantly less difficult for chandler to get accepted into berkeley's grad cert program than for gevani to be accepted into berkeley's undergraduate program
wifeisafurd
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Shocky1 said:

monster assessment of DEFENSIVE production ranking:



keonte kennedy: my favorite bear plays d with a magical spring in his step & a smile on his face while exhorting his teammates via clapping/shouting to raise their defensive games...nba level d iq facilitates his understanding passing lanes & moving thru (not around) screens while attacking the defensive boards with 100% energy..keonte is just FUN to watch

jaylon tyson: nba body but not a well rounded nba game at this time tyson competes for loose balls & is a physical presence on d...his poor passing decisions leading to turnovers & often dubious shot selection es no bueno but his defensive intensity is there due to his competitive nature

gus larson: yeah the walk on is one of the few bears that actually provides off ball defensive help when teammates are beaten off the dribble & plays with verticality in tryna prevent uncontested lay ups...this team is not gonna win more games until the d improves which means larson with his length has earned more minutes on the floor

vladmir pavlovich: a lockdown pesky d presence needs to improve his shooting mechanics to earn more minutes

rodney brown: plays d with enthusiasm with is surprising for a true freshman but terrible with off ball defensive help...could be an alan crabbe presence on d with his length

jalen celestine & devin askew: ok not great on d but got major upside when they become 100% healthy

monty bowser: lou richie's dragon got bounce but not much help on off ball defensive help

nd okafor: still reaching with his hands & fouling, the principal of verticality is gonna be his friend when he figures out how to play dominant d in the paint

jalen cone: gets bullied by opposing pgs on d & for such a talented athlete closes out shockingly slow on 3 pointers

fardaws aimaq: lacks lateral footspeed, gets burned multiple times every game by his opponent attacking the rim for uncontested buckets

grant newell: not really interested in playing d, last guy back in transition down the court



shut up shocky (mr spieker not amused cuz he got worser seats)#
excellent analysis.
Shocky1
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real talk: berkeley's peer institutions harvard, stanford, mit & yale do NOT offer an undergraduate biz program like the haas program...even a secondary academic school like ucla does not offer a biz program, only a mba

wall street, san francisco's financial district & silicon valley venture capital start ups r minted with haas b-grads#
Strykur
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Big C said:

chezzers said:

Do you see Rogers being brought in to push for the starting job or to be a solid #2 behind Mendoza?
Just had a horrible thought: Mendoza wouldn't be leaving, would he? Unlikely, but I bet he has had overtures.
He only played half a season and will play both Florida ACC schools next year anyway.
Shocky1
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https://instagr.am/p/CyRY0ItOSB8
editors note: chandler is NOT signaling his gpa, got it?


2023 & 2024 california golden bears yucky blucky fruitcake classes (mr spieker not amused cuz he got worser seats):

doechii, why don't you introduce the 2023 & 2024 yucky blucky fruitcakes to the class?

2024 class:
chandler rogers, quarterback (3.3 gpa)
teddye buchanan, inside linebacker (3.5 gpa)
josiah martin, wide receiver (3.5 gpa)
jack endries, tight end (3.83 gpa)
trond grizzell, wide receiver (3.8 gpa)
bj canady, defensive tackle (3.91 gpa)
legend journey, apex predator edge defender (3.3 gpa)
rashawn clark, defensive back (3.0+ gpa)
ej caminong, quarterback (3.5 gpa)
dayton "dayday" aupiu (3.51 gpa)
jamaal wiley, running back (3.0+ gpa)
trevor rogers, wide receiver (3.5 gpa)
michael-anthony okwura, defensive lineman (3.4 gpa)
eze osondu, inside linebacker (3.0+ gpa)
brookyln cheek, defensive back (3.0+ gpa)
camden jones, tight end (3.0+ gpa)
tyler knape, offensive line (3.8 gpa)

2023 class:
barrett miller, offensive lineman (4.2 hs gpa & stanford mechancial engineering degree)
taj davis, wide receiver (3.2 gpa)
king doerue, running back (3.5 gpa)
isaiah ifanse, running back (3.2 gpa at montana state)
marcus scott ii, cornerback (3.3 gpa at missouri)
tidiane "frenchy" jalloh (motivated student from france)
matthew wykoff, offensive tackle (3.75 gpa)
marquez "mojo" dortch, wide receiver (3.0+ gpa)
ben finley, quarterback (4.308 gpa)
patrick mcmorris, safety (3.65 gpa)
david bird, longsnapper (4.0 gpa)
marquise montgomery, wide receiver (3.0+ gpa)
martin tine, offensive tackle (3.0+ gpa)
stanley mckenzie, nose tackle (3.3 gpa)
david reese, outside linebacker (3.7 gpa)
sam jackson v, quarterback (3.0+ gpa)
brian hightower, wide receiver (3.2 gpa)
justin williams-thomas aka j-will, running back (4.0 gpa)
asher alberding, tight end (3.85 gpa)
jt byrne, tight end (3.75 gpa)
lachlan wilson, punter (strong student from australia)
byron caldwell, running back (3.3 gpa)
sergio allen, inside linebacker (3.4 gpa)
matt littlejohn, defensive back (3.0+ gpa)
javian "the jet" thomas, running back (3.4 gpa)
nohl williams, defensive back (3.61 gpa)
kaylin moore, defensive back (3.4 gpa)
frederick williams iii, athlete (3.6 gpa)
zurich ashford, defensive end (3.62 gpa)
ben marshall, tight end (3.4 gpa)
ryan mcculloch, outside linebacker (4.1 gpa)
tiumalu afalava, defensive line (4.1 gpa)
cade uluave, inside linebacker (3.8 gpa)
sailasa vadrawale, defensive back (3.46 gpa)
nyziah hunter, wide receiver (3.0+ gpa)
nick morrow, offensive tackle (3.7 gpa)
michael luckhurst, kicker (4.37 gpa)

all 37 of these 2023 & 17 2024 scholly recipients are beating the statistics, **** the opinions and all the logisitics



wow, that was quite the introduction, doechii, we're gonna have to talk after class

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world

don't forget to take the chicken out#

https://instagr.am/p/C0Pe1kVMcdl
chezzers
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Bears just got a commitment from 2024 LB Luke Ferrelli. Former Stanford commit with some big time offers.
Per his twitter.

https://247sports.com/player/luke-ferrelli-46131729/
89Bear
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Rogers, Ferrelli, Carter Jones????
What a bonanza!!!
Shocky1
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the university of calveston=#1 ranked public university in the world (including the eyes of texas)
Shocky1
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a roaring california golden bear welcome to 2024 inside linebacker 6'3" 220 lbs luke ferrelli from carlsbad who upgraded with each flip of commitments: arizona<<<<<<<stanford<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<cal



luke is not a dumb azz, he got a 4.0 gpa at legoland high school & will be graduating early this month by taking 2 advanced placement classes along with multiple online classes too...he will sign on the december 20th national signing day & arrive in berkeley this january for classes in order to compete in coach sirmon's thin inside backer room during 2024 spring ball...fyi, stanford does not offer early enrollment

this is a sideline to sideline tackler who ran a blazing 4.56 40 at the texas a&m camp this summer

ferrelli is a low key low maintenance guy who didn't take an official visit to cal (he did attend cal's junior day on march 11th), luke knows the opportunity to potentially earn playing time at inside backer (the 2 deep is a very realistic goal) during the bears inaugural 2024 acc season plus a degree from the #1 ranked public university in the world is just about everything he needs except for a free buffet breakfast at the claremont

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (and only an hour flight on southwest for the fam on gamedays in the fall)
Shocky1
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https://instagr.am/p/C0h32yWh01Q
coach prime is a piece of **** (and just perfect for the big 12 truck stop academic skools)#
Shocky1
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jaydn ott needs 4 bulletproof tires at discount tire (true)#
Shocky1
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Shocky1 said:

cal's monster offensive line recruiting update (from denton texas):

coach bloesch has extended offers to 2 of his former green meanies trench workers that are now in the transfer portal


6'4" 326 lbs starting right guard febechi nwaiwu from coppell texas (competed in discus & shot put in high school) wuz a redshirt in 2021 (played in 2 games), earned multiple national freshman all american honors in 2022 & wuz a 3rd team all american conference selection 2023 despite battling thru injury issues

feb is not a dumb azz, he also got offers right now from vanderbilt & boston college

listen to this focused, articulate & high energy remarkable young man who got 2 years of remaining eligibility


6'8" 325 lbs left tackle howard sampson from humble texas got 3 years of remaining eligibility & a lotta upside with his physical skillset & length


the university of calveston=#1 ranked public university in the world (including the great state of texas)
https://www.forbes.com/top-colleges/

wut up howard?

how r u?

i am fine

look, coach bloesch wants u for his cal's monster offensive line at the university of calveston but he's too busy to call u rite now cuz he's at buc-ee's right now with his wife & 2 pirate swimming sons, ok?

yeah these r the best graphics evah, kinda looks like chandler is superman or something ripping off that green meanie jersey for a cali bear jersey underneath

howard, trust me on this, we got good food in the san francisco bay area at the #1 ranked public university in the world that's gonna play in the east coast acc with a road game at smu (our new protected annual rivalry opponent) in 2024

anyways u got much better hair than coach mike, does he really watch reruns of king of the hill?

that's kinda messed up

shocky
Shocky1
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cal's monster modern yoga update:


master teacher anton's 4:15 pm class:

shocky's conversation with a hug re: a married teacher's pregnancy announcement

shocky: so do you know whose ur baby daddy?

princess courtney: i do!

https://instagr.am/p/CZUlDjQrySJ
SBGold
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Shockster, are you thinking about the NIL project of Cal players supporting Puppers? It's something we can all support
Shocky1
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https://instagr.am/p/1Gn2ztTJ61
goldy, to be honest with u haven't given it the thought that it deserves rite now as shocky is 100% focused on stormin' the field in shreveport this saturday nite (and not getting arrested again) & then later this month a xmas roadtrip with my kids to miami (nando has been advised NOT to order the 30 day old barracuda at sexy fish) en route to swimming with the piggys in the bahamas

https://instagr.am/p/C0upxbSLHA9
Shocky1
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3.5 gpa caldecott tunnel high school early impact wideout#
Shocky1
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50 year decision day in texas#
Shocky1
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the university of calveston wants u#
JB was a Chieftain
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Give me all your mean greens!!!
Shocky1
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^ +100, jb did u know cal's colors next season gonna be blue, gold & green?

https://instagr.am/p/CpDuOrSJsX_
Shocky1
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cal's monster class recruiting update:

the 2024 best football player from the beautiful state of alaska & recent oregon state decommit 6'1" 190 lbs +1 athlete aaron hampton just took an official visit to cal

aaron is not a dumb azz, he got a 3.4 gpa at anchorage high school whose school cheer talks about frozen igloos or something

the university of califonia, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (including alyeska, the last frontier)
https://www.forbes.com/top-colleges/
UrsineMaximus
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Was he a walk-on at OSU?
DurantAve
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Per 247 he was a PWO for Oregon State, he have a scholly offer from us? I'm skeptical on the comp in Alaska.
Shocky1
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ursine, aaron is a senior in high school & is a 2024 high priority targeted prospect for the cal staff

most alaska recruits don't go to summer camps & aren't evaluated by internet dumb azz guys who played high school football but couldn't get a job with any college of nfl organization, stars don't mean ****...if would be like me as someone whose played the 17 world top 100 golf magazine lists asking the perky cart girl at harding park what's the best golf course in ireland, got it?

Shocky1
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durant, agree re: the comp but watch hampton's hudl, he plays with non stop violent physicality & a chip on his shoulder
Shocky1
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as the bears handle final examinations on the 2nd day of the 2024 fall finals academic calendar & i drive recklessly at the speed of light with the top down the 101 to noon modern yoga with the princess, a quick 32 oz green juice stop at sprouts & then my weekly 2 hour deep tissue massage at the quiet center, now is a good time to tell you again about the worst thing i ever did in berkeley

and with that being said, this isn't gonna be a pretty story

so i wrote a paper for bibliography 128, children's literature, and in rereading it felt it was a technically sound paper but that it lacked interest for the reader...so i totally fabricated & included the following opening paragraph:

"I must confess that I was made uneasy to see Anne Franks's The Diary of a Young Girl on the reading list for this class. Seeing the title on the list raised several burning questions in my mind. Why had I never read this famous book? Why had my father (after a heated and lengthy debate with my mother behind closed doors) removed this work off my bookshelf as a child? It seemed to me that the answers to these questions were somehow linked to my now deceased grandfather. Although my parents never talk about him, I remembered from various bits of information pieced together that Grandpa was a figure of dubious distinction in Hitler's brass during WWII. So I was forced to think. Why were my parents, particularly my father, so reluctant to talk about my grandfather? Could the answers to my grandfather's cloudy role in Germany during WWII be found in The Diary of a Young Girl which was so mysteriously taken off my bookshelf as a child?''

and i also rewrote the following closing paragraph:

"But despite her difficult and sometimes cruel life, Anne Frank did not feel sorry for herself and she never gave up. This is a worthwhile message for both adults and children alike. All in all, The Diary of a Young Girl is a sensitive, well written, and compelling self-portrait of a brave and spirited young girl, that at least for me, will always hold a special place on my bookshelf."

absolutely none of this is true...although i got a german last name in schulz, nobody in my family has ever had any connections with any racist groups...i grew up in a culturally mixed family that celebrates individuality & diversity, i'm a ******* mutt raised by a japanese tiger moms (also a berkeley grad)

so what did my teachers say in grading the paper?

the professor: "This a fine review, not only perceptive in its commentary but in itself very well written. I hope you will keep on writing, perhaps professionally? A+"

the teaching assistant: "Your paper was very perceptive and moving because the book had a great impact on you. Though you did not generalize about non-fiction, you approached this particular book in a sensitive and understanding way. Thank you for sharing this highly personal and emotional reaction-it was very important for me personally as an Isreali jew, well versed in the literature of the holocaust, to read your reaction to the subject. The book has made you think, grow up, seek further information, and if it has instilled in you the determination not to let the horrible and shameful history repeat itself, then it has served the purpose Anne's father had when he published her diary. A+"

i'm a flawed person but i know i need to set the record straight even if it means that i'm gonna flunk the class so i go to the ta's office hours

i walk in the door & i'm blown away...aubrey (mid to late 20s) is the cutest girl on planet earth (petite & curvy brunette yoga female with sparkling eyes & a dazzling smile) & we talk/laugh for about an hour about our favorite authors, recent concerts & the personalities of doggys...but i never tell her my paper is full of ****, i can't stand the thought of her hating me so quickly

so i ask her if she would like to go bike riding with me at muir woods & stinson beach that weekend (with the idea that i would tell her the truth & also see her in a bikini) & she tells me she would love to go out with me but that the university code of professional standards does not allow teachers to date students

i don't give up that easily so i suggest we bring our doggys, surely there can be no policy against our doggys hanging out together, right?

https://instagr.am/p/BxSgywLBG5x
she looks at me with sad eyes & tells me "this isn't going to happen, it can't happen" and we say our goodbyes

fast forward to a couple of summers ago & i take my daughters shay & taylor to anne frank's house in amsterdam...i write & leave a note to both anne frank & the teacher's assistant apologizing for my actions

you every do anything worser in berkeley?

don't be a dumb azz#
oskiswifeshusband
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Legend
82gradDLSdad
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Shocky1 said:



as the bears handle final examinations on the 2nd day of the 2024 fall finals academic calendar & i drive recklessly at the speed of light with the top down the 101 to noon modern yoga with the princess, a quick 32 oz green juice stop at sprouts & then my weekly 2 hour deep tissue massage at the quiet center, now is a good time to tell you again about the worst thing i ever did in berkeley

and with that being said, this isn't gonna be a pretty story

so i wrote a paper for bibliography 128, children's literature, and in rereading it felt it was a technically sound paper but that it lacked interest for the reader...so i totally fabricated & included the following opening paragraph:

"I must confess that I was made uneasy to see Anne Franks's The Diary of a Young Girl on the reading list for this class. Seeing the title on the list raised several burning questions in my mind. Why had I never read this famous book? Why had my father (after a heated and lengthy debate with my mother behind closed doors) removed this work off my bookshelf as a child? It seemed to me that the answers to these questions were somehow linked to my now deceased grandfather. Although my parents never talk about him, I remembered from various bits of information pieced together that Grandpa was a figure of dubious distinction in Hitler's brass during WWII. So I was forced to think. Why were my parents, particularly my father, so reluctant to talk about my grandfather? Could the answers to my grandfather's cloudy role in Germany during WWII be found in The Diary of a Young Girl which was so mysteriously taken off my bookshelf as a child?''

and i also rewrote the following closing paragraph:

"But despite her difficult and sometimes cruel life, Anne Frank did not feel sorry for herself and she never gave up. This is a worthwhile message for both adults and children alike. All in all, The Diary of a Young Girl is a sensitive, well written, and compelling self-portrait of a brave and spirited young girl, that at least for me, will always hold a special place on my bookshelf."

absolutely none of this is true...although i got a german last name in schulz, nobody in my family has ever had any connections with any racist groups...i grew up in a culturally mixed family that celebrates individuality & diversity, i'm a ******* mutt raised by a japanese tiger moms (also a berkeley grad)

so what did my teachers say in grading the paper?

the professor: "This a fine review, not only perceptive in its commentary but in itself very well written. I hope you will keep on writing, perhaps professionally? A+"

the teaching assistant: "Your paper was very perceptive and moving because the book had a great impact on you. Though you did not generalize about non-fiction, you approached this particular book in a sensitive and understanding way. Thank you for sharing this highly personal and emotional reaction-it was very important for me personally as an Isreali jew, well versed in the literature of the holocaust, to read your reaction to the subject. The book has made you think, grow up, seek further information, and if it has instilled in you the determination not to let the horrible and shameful history repeat itself, then it has served the purpose Anne's father had when he published her diary. A+"

i'm a flawed person but i know i need to set the record straight even if it means that i'm gonna flunk the class so i go to the ta's office hours

i walk in the door & i'm blown away...aubrey (mid to late 20s) is the cutest girl on planet earth (petite & curvy brunette yoga female with sparkling eyes & a dazzling smile) & we talk/laugh for about an hour about our favorite authors, recent concerts & the personalities of doggys...but i never tell her my paper is full of ****, i can't stand the thought of her hating me so quickly

so i ask her if she would like to go bike riding with me at muir woods & stinson beach that weekend (with the idea that i would tell her the truth & also see her in a bikini) & she tells me she would love to go out with me but that the university code of professional standards does not allow teachers to date students

i don't give up that easily so i suggest we bring our doggys, surely there can be no policy against our doggys hanging out together, right?

https://instagr.am/p/BxSgywLBG5x
she looks at me with sad eyes & tells me "this isn't going to happen, it can't happen" and we say our goodbyes

fast forward to a couple of summers ago & i take my daughters shay & taylor to anne frank's house in amsterdam...i write & leave a note to both anne frank & the teacher's assistant apologizing for my actions

you every do anything worser in berkeley?

don't be a dumb azz#


I did. Almost got expelled. I'd have to tell you over a glass of bourbon.
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