cal's monster offensive line

2,188,744 Views | 12637 Replies | Last: 3 hrs ago by Shocky1
Shocky1
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washington is gonna hire 60 year old kansas hc lance leipold

last season the jayhawks leading receiver caught 44 passes, the 2nd leading receiver 33 receiver & everybody else sub 30 catches

yeah jeremiah hunter can either cash his nil payout in seattle for a rushing attack focused program, take his chances in alabama & potentially get lost on the depth chart or something

life is not linear#
Shocky1
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3.8 gpa 2024 david abajian wuz a high priority cal's monster offensive line target who originally committed to oregon state due to his relationship with coach michalczik, decommited when the beavers became conference partners with sonoma state & then committed to kansas due to his relationship with coach fuchs

david, this is why selecting an elite university like cal, stanford or the ivy leagues is the highest probability route to positioning yourself in the best position to earn generational wealth in the future, got it?...picking truck stop skools with mediocre academics that got offensive line coaches that never unpack their suitcases is a fool's errand

and freezing azz weather is not a plus either, why would anyone wanna leave cali for college?

https://instagr.am/p/CwlwhI0t--L
life is not linear (rock, chalk & caulk)#
Shocky1
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^ outstanding armpit hygiene management

hair is for losers (except for a ponytail)#
juarezbear
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Shocky1 said:

shocky's hawaii top 10:

https://instagr.am/p/B93P9HjDUlX
plz keep in mind that lifelong students of golf course architecture weigh heavily the architect's routing as it affects the walkability of a course...most casual golfers don't really care about this but golf purists don't consider playing in a golf cart real golf & most hawaiian island courses are really just scenic vapid cartball venues...and so with that being said, this is the monster's rankings:

1) kapalua plantation: a stunning marriage of the ocean & a challenging mountainous pineapple field, the plantation is the only must play design in the islands...finishing on the dramatic wind swept downhill par 5 18th hole with lanai in the background is one of life's great joys
https://instagr.am/p/CgUoT4QuwAs
huge chasm in the rankings

2) nanea: charles schwab's uber private venue (his partner is george roberts of kk&r) for zillionaires is a spectacular david kidd design but it's a shame that with thousands of acres at his disposal that kidd didn't create a tighter more walkable design...the outdoor shower in the modern clubhouse is one of my favorite locker room amenities in the world
https://instagr.am/p/CUgP2KPvs3u
3) mauna kea: robert trent jones sr best design in his multiple decade design portfolio, it lacks the predictability that defines so much of his work...the collection of par 3 are outstanding as is the once a week buffet on the beach after swimming with the friendly but scary azz looking sea eels
https://instagr.am/p/CuaX06WuPtx
4) mama's fish house: pro tip, get a reservation unless u wanna dine on the taco bell/pizza hut combo meal in town
https://instagr.am/p/ChFe77aJ5xz
5) kukio: one of tom fazio's best designs with more strategic options than most of his usual work, the over the top lavish refreshment stands are a great way to put another 10+ lbs on a long weekend

6) wailua: outstanding public course hardscrabbled along the coastline on kauai, 40 bucks to walk on weekdays, a morning round followed by an afternoon t-rex jurassic park hike is a perfect day...the rustic caynon of the islands

7) waialae cc: there's not much seth raynor left in the design but tom doak is taking steps to return some of it, love the tight walkable routing with views of diamond head

8) manele: dramatic nicklaus course on lanai but flawed by its cartball routing

9) kukul'ula: dramatic weiskopf course on kauai but flawed by its cartball routing

10) any ramen shop in honolulu or food truck on the epic north shore
https://instagr.am/p/Cb8LOi6B0fl


the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (including stinson beach & the hawaiian islands, aloha baby)


I've never played Kapalua because I'm a Big Island guy, but I just played Nanea and was blown away. I know you hate riding in carts, but that aside, the course was in perfect condition, the greens rolled true, and our caddie would make your yoga body brunette All-Island team. Mauna Kea is going to be redone which it really needs. I hope they don't **** it up. I played in 2 Sony Opens at Wailea. Decent track and good for walking. I love the Par 3 with the 4 Palm trees on the shape of a W that was featured in It's A Mad Mad Mad Mad World.

Shocky1
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https://instagr.am/p/xpsEnQRYl-
hollywood, that's a great idea, an all curvy brunette yoga female all island team!

look, founder charles schwab's ultra exclusive (a couple of groups in a busy day at the club) nanea is an outstanding golf experience (the outdoor shower in the clubhouse after the round is a tropical paradise & the chocolate milkshake that the former club manager jim saunders brought from whisper rock is intergalactic energizing) but the golf architecture is only good not great...the fairway on the short par 4 9th is so severely sloped towards the tee that balls funnel backwards when the course plays firm & fast...and the lack of a tight walkable routing is inexcusable given that architect kidd had 10,000 acres at his disposal with no housing component limitations & an unlimited budget...the fun straight downhill with heavy tradwinds at ur back par 5 18th hole is a great finish to a round at nanea

sorry to hear mauna kea is kinda tired looking these days, glad to hear it's gonna be polished up with an upcoming restoration



that's very cool that you've played waialae country twice under tournament conditions, the ball just sinks in the bermuda rough which places a premium strategically on accurately driving off the tee box...yeah the 16th hole with its "w" is truly a hawaiian icon, shocky's favorite tree on planet earth r palm trees (that's why he commissioned this artwork for his living room at the tree fort)


the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (for palm trees at the claremont)
Goobear
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Shocky1 said:

washington is gonna hire 60 year old kansas hc lance leipold

last season the jayhawks leading receiver caught 44 passes, the 2nd leading receiver 33 receiver & everybody else sub 30 catches

yeah jeremiah hunter can either cash his nil payout in seattle for a rushing attack focused program, take his chances in alabama & potentially get lost on the depth chart or something

life is not linear#
Not
Shocky1
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^ ur right, it's jedd fisch (who is a fantastic leader)
JB was a Chieftain
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Shocky1 said:


3.8 gpa 2024 david abajian wuz a high priority cal's monster offensive line target who originally committed to oregon state due to his relationship with coach michalczik, decommited when the beavers became conference partners with sonoma state & then committed to kansas due to his relationship with coach fuchs

david, this is why selecting an elite university like cal, stanford or the ivy leagues is the highest probability route to positioning yourself in the best position to earn generational wealth in the future, got it?...picking truck stop skools with mediocre academics that got offensive line coaches that never unpack their suitcases is a fool's errand

and freezing azz weather is not a plus either, why would anyone wanna leave cali for college?

https://instagr.am/p/CwlwhI0t--L
life is not linear (rock, chalk & caulk)#


Sonoma State Alum. Unfortunately no football anymore at SSU but we will always have Larry Allen!
Shocky1
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jb, don't tell nobody but one of the shockster's academic strategies back in the day wuz to take the haas undergraduate biz school prerequisite computer science class at sonoma state during the summer on a pass/not pass basis in order to not **** up my gpa

as someone who is not particularly interested in technology (which is kinda funny as my daughter taylor is selling high tech services in nyc) & got a flip phone my grade at sonoma state would've maybe been a gift "c" at best...anyways the monster graduated with a 3.92 gpa (thx to sonoma state) from the haas biz school & he's also a big fan of the mud pie at mary's pizza shack on west spain street

https://instagr.am/p/CsExW2Zpeet
go seawolves#
Shocky1
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https://instagr.am/p/C2GB-mPpecy
collin morikawaa's close friend & fellow haas biz ad grad kk limbhaust (lives down the street at greyhawk in north scottsdale) is on top of the leaderboard of the 1st 2024 korn ferry tournament in the bahamas after a 1st round en fuego 8 birdies/no bogey 64

traveling bears wanna see the world (where's ur passport, baby?)#
juarezbear
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Shocky1 said:

https://instagr.am/p/xpsEnQRYl-
hollywood, that's a great idea, an all curvy brunette yoga female all island team!

look, founder charles schwab's ultra exclusive (a couple of groups in a busy day at the club) nanea is an outstanding golf experience (the outdoor shower in the clubhouse after the round is a tropical paradise & the chocolate milkshake that the former club manager jim saunders brought from whisper rock is intergalactic energizing) but the golf architecture is only good not great...the fairway on the short par 4 9th is so severely sloped towards the tee that balls funnel backwards when the course plays firm & fast...and the lack of a tight walkable routing is inexcusable given that architect kidd had 10,000 acres at his disposal with no housing component limitations & an unlimited budget...the fun straight downhill with heavy tradwinds at ur back par 5 18th hole is a great finish to a round at nanea

sorry to hear mauna kea is kinda tired looking these days, glad to hear it's gonna be polished up with an upcoming restoration



that's very cool that you've played waialae country twice under tournament conditions, the ball just sinks in the bermuda rough which places a premium strategically on accurately driving off the tee box...yeah the 16th hole with its "w" is truly a hawaiian icon, shocky's favorite tree on planet earth r palm trees (that's why he commissioned this artwork for his living room at the tree fort)


the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (for palm trees at the claremont)


Fair enough.
Shocky1
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^ still got nanea ranked as the 2nd best course in hawaii, just don't think it's a world top 100 candidate design
Shocky1
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Shocky1 said:


hawaiian open 2nd round update:

as mentioned here multiple times since walking with him during his career transformational record shooting 61 last summer at the scottish open, byeong hun an is gonna be the next california golden bear to win a pga tournament

ben an is in a 5 way tie for 1st place with 3 holes left to play

the magic of cal golf#
Shocky1
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chubby purdy (never profiled by the monster, would've been qb3 in berkeley) commits to san jose state

free rent/food & access to a luxury whip#
Shocky1
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hawaii open final round update:

ben an will be in a 3 way playoff on the sudden death extra hole, the sharp dogleg left par 5 18th hole which strongly favors a draw off the tee box!

this hole favors ben, he works the ball right to left, both keegan bradley & grayson murray prefer to cut the ball...an also led the tournament in driving distance this week at 328 yards while bradley averaged 313 yards & murray average 310 yards...ben hit a 3 iron into the green pin high during regulation, the other 2 guys will likely need to hit a fairway wood assuming all 3 players are in the fairway

listen to last summer's scottish open record setting 61 by ben an, if you listen carefully you can hear shocky in the gallery yelling "wow, go bears"

let's ******* go (let's do this)!!!


GO BEARS#
Shocky1
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yeah that didn't end well, the most brutal missed short putt in the history of cal golf along with the michael weaver (haas biz ad school grad) 3 footer lip out on the 18th hole at cherry hills in denver to win the us amateur

but make no mistake about it byeong hun an is gonna win his 1st pga tournament sooner than later, got it?

https://instagr.am/p/Cu91JqLBPpf
max, collin & ben not playing this week at the pga's next stop in the palm desert but shocky is planning on getting over to the coachella valley on thursday to walk with michael kim in his opening round & will NOT make the mistake of dining at the nest again which is 100% dog food



cal golf got walked to its car (but the sun will rise tomorrow)#
Shocky1
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Shocky1 said:

^ ur right, it's jedd fisch (who is a fantastic leader)

tuscon is a dump#
Shocky1
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Shocky1 said:

Shocky1 said:




cal athletic director head in the sand dept (wut u won't read in knowlton notes):

the above graphic wuz shared by obn (our beaver nation) with major donors, it shows the catastrophic financial implications of the most recent conference realignments with respects to oregon state

and while the monster still believes the 2024 game against the beavers at memorial stadium is a dangerous game with all american running back damien "dui" martinez & gevani "the real" mccoy, oregon state athletics with its $42,000,000 annual financial deficit is heading towards a portland state voo doo donuts future...no es bueno

but guess wut?

oregon state only got 16 sports programs while cal got 30+ sports teams with significantly more overhead employee costs with much higher wages paid in berkeley vs corvallis

cal is accepting 30% of acc full share revenues (according to jim & markeisha we're "donating" the other 70% to our conference partners like florida state) until almost the end of the decade, knowlton is balancing the budget thru his secret loans from the central campus including the $11,000,000 last fiscal year debt that required me to make relentless public information requests that he directed his staff to obfuscate and delay in sending me the requested information...there will NEVER be future revenues to pay off this looming financial repayments, got it?

the reality it that the con artist has shown no fiscal ability/interest in balancing the budget or even publicly discussing financial matters with the cal community

so wut's the solution?


of the 3 finalists for chancellor, lyons is the only one that has shown any public interest in athletics plus he's a berkeley insider (who knows how to real a financial statement) and knows the financial issues & staff (cadre of worthless bureaucrats) 1st hand

richard lyons for chancellor & andrew mcgraw for athletic director in 2024!!!#

athletic directors across the country including arizona's dave heeke are outlining their cost cutting strategies for dealing with the incoming financial tsunami of college sports...and there are only 18 sport teams in tuscon plus they got revenue drivers in nationally ranked football & basketball programs yet the athletic director is still transparently revealing there are "no immediate" (tomorrow then?) plans to cut any of the 18 teams to rightsize to the ncca minimum required 15 programs

not a single word on financical matters from the con artist

the knowlton & markeisha strategy of no FREE tixs for ALL students contributed along with the derelict outreach to potential new fans in this week's mbb game at haas pavilion vs colorado with a reported attendance of 2,256


cal athletics is NOT gonna survive james arthur knowlton (throwing money out the window)#
why is jedd fisch heading to washington?

due to financial challenges (at outlined above) at arizona jedd fisch's new contract wuz delayed until the february arizona board of regents meeting for ratification (with no guarantees of approval) so fisch made it known he wuz ready to pack his suitcase

broke azz athletic departments are heading towards existential financial icebergs

cap
WalterSobchak
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Shocky1 said:



broke azz athletic departments are heading towards existential financial icebergs

cap

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Shocky1
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dr martin luther king jr remembrance day

https://instagr.am/p/B7jUlMQFKif




the university of california, berkeley=a worldwide epicenter of the free speech & civil rights movement (and also the #1 ranked public university in the world)
Shocky1
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Shocky1
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https://instagr.am/p/C1iE5XJPfsb
the leader of cal's monster offensive line brian driscoll has still NOT responded to my daughter taylor's friend request on instagram...look brian, her sister shay is at denver law & aced the lsat, tay could share with u some preps tips or something, don't be a dumb azz

https://instagr.am/p/B0t0aGUFWqU
wut's up with that? (maybe brian like bacon & NOT wild azz piglets)#
Shocky1
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justin wilcox got a good agent

new england patriots#
Shocky1
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arizona got no money (see above post re: financials), next wildcats football head coach will be either san jose state's brent brennan or internal candidate (well liked by players) defensive coordinator johnny nansen

tuscon is a dump#
Shocky1
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https://instagr.am/p/CSxvM3Xl9gV
washington update:

heading to alabama are nfl developer of talent wide receiver coach jamarcus shepard (does jeremiah hunter wanna stay in seattle & play for pete carroll's son?) & arguably the nation's top offensive line coach scott huff

that's some really bad ******* coffee to swallow for huskies fans

since the inception of this cal's monster offensive line thread, the bears primary competition for trench workers has been usc (nil dollars to prospects from lower socioeconomic families), washington (scott huff) & oregon state (jim michalzik)

with huff & michalzik departing from the west coast, coach bloesch is now well positioned to recruit & sign elite left coast talent in 2025 along with our continued focus on texas

coffee is for losers (where's ur 32 oz green drink?)#
Shocky1
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]

the following is a reprint from cal's monster class back in the day:

happy & misty mae chewed up my favorite yoga pants (they apparently did not get the email reminding them that i'm the alpha dog in our pack) so i went over to lulu lemon at the q by kierland in north scottsdale to pick out a new pair:

curvy brunette yoga sales girl: these are really attractive, is there anything else i can do for you?

shocky: well, can i get that poster on the wall?

yoga girl: no, that's not available, why do you ask?

shocky: i'm a dumb azz

yoga girl: you don't look like a dumb azz

shocky: looks can be deceiving

yoga girl: hmmmm...well, i like your pink shirt

shocky: thanks but it's not pink, it's fuschia

yoga girl: ok, i like your fuschia shirt

shocky: thanks, i like your yoga pants

yoga girl (smiling): thanks!

yoga girl: do you have anyone special to care for these pants, do you know how to properly clean them?

shocky: i dunno, i kinda treat my yoga pants like my rescue doggys

yoga girl: really, how does that work?

shocky: well, when they start to smell bad i throw them in the pool & then jump in naked with them

yoga girl: wow, i'll bet your neighbors love you!

annoying lady in line: miss, excuse me, if you two are done doing whatever it is that you're doing, could i just pay for my stuff now and get out of here?

shut up, shocky#

modern yoga noon class update:

it's true, bill schulz (very stable, berkeley grad) & schulzie (slightly worser & more fun version of bill schulz) filed a verbal restraining order in scottsdale federal court against shocky (crazy as **** & truly believed cal wuz gonna win a national championship in men's basketball but did play the world top 100 courses) prohibiting him from basically saying anything & specifically inappropriate complete lack of social filtering comments to this curvy brunette yoga teacher (which has resulted in the monster avoiding her classes for years which is made easier by the fact that she mostly teaches at430 am or something)

but shocky think he's kinda clever so after her final wise words in shavanaasa he looks directly in her eyes and says "ruff!"

yeah communicating thru doggy dog language is NOT expressly prohibited in my verbal restraining order, haha

shut the **** up, shocky!#

https://instagr.am/p/C2F6fWbsBD4
Shocky1
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funny ucla update: j mike announced he's gonna forego the 2024 draft in order to return to westwood

jms lacks elite separation speed & dynamic explosiveness of attacking the ball at its high point along with sloppy azz route running, there wuz ZERO chance he wuz gonna get drafted
Shocky1
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Shocky1 said:

arizona got no money (see above post re: financials), next wildcats football head coach will be either san jose state's brent brennan or internal candidate (well liked by players) defensive coordinator johnny nansen

tuscon is a dump#
brent brennan is the next wildcats head coach

2024 fun times in the big 12 truck stop towns low academic conference (bear down)#

oskiswifeshusband
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Wonder if sjsu opening up has any implications on any of our staff. Good move for first time HC?

SIRMON?
Big C
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oskiswifeshusband said:

Wonder if sjsu opening up has any implications on any of our staff. Good move for first time HC?

SIRMON?

As great as he has been for us... as well as being close to Wilcox, who would we be to stand in his way if he chooses to pursue an opportunity like that?
Shocky1
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in the new transfer portal era, keeping ur roster intact is a significant factor in hiring a head football coach

would bet an aqua blue yoga matt & a sleeve of green pro v's that the spartans promote alonzo carter
Shocky1
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convicted rapist (along with a teammate) of a female high school student behind the bleachers after a big win at st louis high school in the islands former arizona qb jaydn de laura commits to texas state

honestly hope he breaks his clavicle in spring ball
Shocky1
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usc portal transfer wide receiver dorian singer commits to utah, local phoenix high school coaches consider singer a headcase that can disrupt team chemistry

singer took an official visit to berkeley that the staff wanted off the record
Shocky1
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cal's monster class point guard of the future (ice in his veins)#
Shocky1
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look pitts, cal's monster class is a judgement free zone, got it?..this is a safe zone for everyone on planet earth particularly rescue doggys & curvy brunette yoga females

but yeah mikey passed on the coos bay fast mart supervisor training program for future oregon & oregon state grads with convenience store/truck stop hospitality degrees which usually results in marrying a lot lizard with highly contagious stds & cfm pumps

sai is gonna build minimum wage plus wealth which will allow him to buy multiple boxes of voo doo donuts with fuschia sprinkles & jelly belly insides in portland at 2:16 am on his days off...but unfortunately jeremiah's future with his harvard of idaho degree isn't even that bright

and there's NOTHING wrong with that, berkeley is not for everyone




generational wealth=NOT 15 bucks an hour at the coos bay fast mart convenience store#
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