cal's monster offensive line

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bencgilmore
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In reply to Shocky1 • 10:27a, 11/25/24
Shocky1 said:
Shocky1 said:
wut do jaron keawe sagapolutele & jaylen brown got in common?

1) both r mama boys (kinda like shocky who wuz raised by a tiger moms)!!

https://instagr.am/p/Bd1eFXijhTU
2) both r gonna get paid, jks got the standard collective negotiating a market rate nil deal & jaylen brown signed a nba supermax contract of 5 years for $304,000,000 with the boston celtics...jared goff signed a nfl contract of 4 years for $212,000,000 with the detroit lions & aaron rodgers career nfl earnings are north of $400,000,000+

https://instagr.am/p/DAoAWBludGU
3) both are/will benefiting from shocky branding, a FUN socially aware intellectual that's safe for middle america consumption


4) both are/will gonna become quick twitch healthy as **** +1 athletic with strong mental health via shocky inspired yoga/meditation practices



5) both are NOT dumb azz jocks, jks gotta 3.75 gpa (fun fact: berkeley grad jared goff gotta 3.85 gpa at stinson beach high school wuz) & jaylen took multiple upper division courses as a freshman...cal, stanford & ivy league affiliations send a powerful message!!

https://instagr.am/p/BZRTvlagD9_
6) both are/will gonna see the light re: curvy brunette yoga females with smokeshow PONYTAILS (fun fact: jaylen might've gone a bit overboard on this ****, shocky not talking)

https://instagr.am/p/C8A_p26vxKE
keep me company (every athlete on planet earth is one violent split second away from being done forever, then wut?...wut's ur gpa??)#

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (for those that wanna use the berkeley brand both athletically & mentally to build GENERATIONAL WEALTH while avoiding football factories that view u as a disposable 2nd/3rd option)
https://soundcloud.com/the-tribe-akashic/keep-me-company-feat-master-wendu-tae-haru?in=jay-donais%2Fsets%2Ftribe
^ co produced by jb

jks recruiting update:

the mid week official visit to georiga has been CANCELLED per mori suesue (his highly regarded nil representative), final decision will be announced probably on sunday
wooooohoooo!
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Shocky1
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10:42a, 11/25/24
^ benny, this **** is getting LIVE!!

https://instagr.am/p/BqW3p1zHSmC
the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the WORLD (including ewa beach)


^ where's oregon on this list??

don't be a dumb azz#
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6956bear
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In reply to Shocky1 • 11:02a, 11/25/24
Shocky1 said:
Shocky1 said:
zony, u make a lotta good points (as usual) but marcus harris is outta eligibility...trond grizzell's spectacular day as the #1 wideout target (along with nyziah hunter) & hunter barth's starting assignment at inside backer will most likely result in some very interesting conversations after the final game re: 2025 nil & playing time commitments...hunter's older bro played for asu back in the day & is still involved with the program

2024 transfer portal update:

shocky can confirm that both trond & hunter will be receptive to productive conversations after the smu game re: their potential futures with the program, neither player wants to leave their teammates in 2025 if it makes sense to stay in berkeley...but the timeline for these conversations needs to be as quickly as possible after the smu game & well before the transfer portal opens on december 9th (runs thru december 28th)

in the staff's scoring of nfl combine drills for linebackers (the metrics utilized by national football league scouts for prospect athleticism evaluations) barth scored the highest among all (both inside & outside) current golden bear linebackers...yeah closing SPEED matters in berkeley (let's ******* go, **** around with trev & find out)!!
I certainly believe that Cal will have players looking to get more NIL $$. Trond and Hunter have earned the right to have those conversations. I believe Hunter gets more on the market as a player with multiple seasons of eligibility remaining.

Barth is a good player. I think he and Trond signalled their intentions by walking on Saturday. Both could be influenced to stay via NIL $$, but if it is me I am paying Hunter and Barth before Grizzell. Much will depend on who else is planning on entering the portal. The WR room has some young players (Martin and Rogers) that could be ready come next season.

ILB is a big concern. Buchanan is done. As is Liam Johnson. Uluave likely would command a nice offer if he decides to leave. Barth is a known quantity so would be someone I would like to keep.

This offseason will be very interesting. The program needs a lot and has some players that will be in demand elsewhere. You likely cannot pay everybody. JKS will not come for free and Mendoza will also need to be paid.

Isn't college football fun these days?
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Pittstop
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In reply to Shocky1 • 11:40a, 11/25/24
Shocky1 said:
^ benny, this **** is getting LIVE!!

https://instagr.am/p/BqW3p1zHSmC
the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the WORLD (including ewa beach)


^ where's oregon on this list??

don't be a dumb azz#


Only ONE (1) "public University" on this list. Could it be "the #1 public University in the world"?
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Shocky1
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2:25p, 11/25/24
https://instagr.am/p/B7bzfQ0puzh
pitts, the truth is that buc-ee is the #1 ranked mascot on planet earth for curvy brunette yoga females from academically mediocre schools like smu & the university of ibiza/havana that think clothes r for losers & that are attracted to cal, stanford & ivy league grads with high gpas!!

https://instagr.am/p/CsukIi2tyZo
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2:32p, 11/25/24


heavy r the heads that wear the crown at the #1 ranked public university on planet earth!!!!#
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Shocky1
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2:39p, 11/25/24

KAAAABBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2026 5'11" 165 lbs lockdown corner back with elite SPEED & quick twitch athleticism jayden crowder from santa margarita high school is the 1st public commitment for the 2026 class & a future TAKER!!

jayden is NOT a dumb azz, he got a 3.4 gpa


the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (including corona, right breezy??)
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Shocky1
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2:50p, 11/25/24
real talk: utah is cold as ****, the offensive coordinator andy ludwig is being forced to step down, the utes play in the **** academics big 12 truck stop conference, flights from the west coast to salt lake city are expensive for the fam & nobody in corporate america is impressed when a resume from a candidate with a utah degree floats across their desk on the way to the trash can

plus there are zero legit usa (forget world) top 100 golf courses, sand hollow's big course is scenic as **** but ruined by an unwalkable cartball routing on the dramatic back nine & the recently opened black desert's pure golf experience is gonna be ruined by ugly azz housing

honestly the only truly awesome things about utah are cade uluave, trond grizzell & arches national park!!!

https://instagr.am/p/C9hy6DXJnXc
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Shocky1
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3:44p, 11/25/24

left to right:

jae'on young (3.4 gpa), tre harrison (4.83 gpa), aiden manutai (4.0 gpa) & anthony league (3.9 gpa) & jaron keawe sagapolutele (3.75 gpa)


don't be a dumb azz#

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the WORLD

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Shocky1
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In reply to Shocky1 • 4:04p, 11/25/24
Shocky1 said:

KAAAABBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2026 5'11" 165 lbs lockdown corner back with elite SPEED & quick twitch athleticism jayden crowder from santa margarita high school is the 1st public commitment for the 2026 class & a future TAKER!!

jayden is NOT a dumb azz, he got a 3.4 gpa


the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (including corona, right breezy??)
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Shocky1
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7:49p, 11/25/24

cal's next athletic director, berkeley grad (football walk on/band member) andrew "football first" mcgraw!!

the reason cal is the only school in the nation that has asked its legal counsel to review the 2025 ncca $20,500,000 nil distributions to see if the quidditch team should get as much money as the football team is because of the continued anti revenue sports agendas of ****tards worthless bureaucrats general knowlton & the evil as **** jennifer simon-o'neil

lyons is telling the builders of berkeley that there's no money to fire knowlton but the truth is that he opted not to fire the con artist due to the mckeever scandal...but there's still time to terminate jimbo, promote mcgraw to athletic director, cut sports teams while balancing the athletic department budget (knowlton cannot read a financial statement) & competing for championships in a much streamlined operation with more berkeley grads in key positions including mike saffell as the football head coach in waiting

shocky's gameplan for EXCELLENCE in berkeley (is really ******* simple)#
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8:09p, 11/25/24
https://instagr.am/p/C1ibA6Nv9TU
6956, agreed that the personnel/recruiting evaluations/decisions during the next 30+ days will be critical to the success of the 2025 season & seasons beyond

the truth is that longwell (with wilcox/cherrington also accountable for this **** decision) running off mateen has cost the bears a current 9-2 and maybe even 10-1 2024 record instead of 6-5

so getting everything squared away with hunter barth early next week to secure his 2025 commitment is really important for the 2025 defense at inside backer with both teddeye & liam moving on to their next life's adventures...once again in nfl combine scoring metrics barth is the highest scoring linebacker (both inside & outside) of all the bears linebackers, there's nobody in the portal who will bring his unique blend of athleticism, knowledge of the coach sirmon schemes & continuity with the program's current tight knit chemistry...as a bonus he is the bears best special teams player already causing 3 fumbles this season with violent collisions!!

and barth already gotta offer from earnest & young in his quest to becoming a future ceo (there's zero doubt in
shocky's mind this is gonna happen, hunter will be a rainmaker that brings in clients, deals & helps retain talent) but they want him to take an accounting class asap...the berkeley grad cert program in accounting is the perfect fit

plus hunter already gotta curvy brunette yoga female that played on cal's ncca women's soccer team!!

recruiting starts 1st within the program (retain the blue chippers)#
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Shocky1
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9:10p, 11/25/24

https://instagr.am/p/DCzU1hLiq_I
monster big game multi talented MVP!!#
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9:32p, 11/25/24

rooting for former bears commit sub 3.0 gpa jojo to earn a degree from sac state
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Vandalus
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In reply to Shocky1 • 10:37p, 11/25/24
Shocky1 said:
Shocky1 said:
https://instagr.am/p/DCmqbJ4ScQR
oregon quarterback recruiting update:

the ducks got their 2026 #1 target jonas williams who fits the ducks offensive schemes of a qb1 with elite running skills (not a nfl pro style dropback passer) who will be joining 5 star donte moore (learning the offense during the 2024 season) & incoming 5 star 6'6" freak +1 athletic akili jones jr (already a local favorite due to his dad's stardom back in the day) in a crowded qb room in eugene

oregon is a ruthless football factory that brings in as many high end disposable gladiators as possible, the ultimate winner of this hunger games qb1 competition needs to be ready if their opportunity arises because they're gonna be ****** if football don't work out for them in today's highly competitive global economy that favors the well educated such as cal, stanford & ivy league grads

stacking qbs in eugene (disposable gladiators without academic ambition)#
It's pretty wild that Akili Smith Jr is playing at his pop's HS alma mater and of course is committed to Oregon. Lincoln is in a rough part of town - so either dad is keeping it real by staying in the hood, or he commutes in from La Jolla or something.

~Spectemur agendo~
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Shocky1
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2:42a, 11/26/24
wut up, vandy (former cal track guy, unreal fast white guy with javid best SPEED & now a successful attorney)??

yeah, akili smith & his wife camille (living a middle class lifestyle) are not living in the lincoln high school neighborhood (but they can't afford la jolla either with an oregon education either) after his 4 year nfl career (that money is long gone), these days akili is teaching/developing high schoolers including his son the finer points of the position via the triple threat quarterback biz

https://instagr.am/p/CFBuGp-Dli4
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2:50a, 11/26/24

california golden bears yucky blucky fruitcake classes (mr spieker not amused cuz he got worser seats):

doechii, why don't you introduce the yucky blucky fruitcakes to the class?

2026 class:

jaydn crowder, corner/nickel (3.4 gpa)

2025 class:

john tofi jr, edge defender (3.8 gpa)
aiden manutai, safety (4.0 gpa)
jaron keawe sagapolutele, quarterback (3.75 gpa)
tre' harrison, safety (4.83 gpa)
mike klisiewicz, offensive lineman (3.7 gpa)
jacob houseworth, tight end (3.25 gpa)
jae'on young, corner/nickel back (3.4 gpa)
lebron williams, defensive end (3.2 gpa)
beckham barney, inside linebacker (4.2 gpa)
anthony league, running back (3.9 gpa)
ikechukwu okafor, edge defender (3.7 gpa)
ben howard, offensive guard (3.2 gpa)
meyer swinney, hybrid wide receiver/tight end (3.75 gpa)
kaden cook, cornerback (3.4 gpa)

2024 class:

will mcdonald, left guard (3.5 gpa)
checkhsaliou fall, edge defender (3.3 gpa)
cj harris, quarterback (3.5 gpa)
serigne tounkara, edge defender (3.88 gpa)
kyion graves, wide receiver (3.3 gpa)
ryan yaites, safety (3.2 gpa)
jasiah wagoner, corner/nickel back (3.25 gpa)
tj bollers, edge defender (4.0 gpa)
corey dyches, hybrid tight end/wide receiver (3.1 gpa)
braden miller, offensive tackle (4.0 gpa)
liam johnson, inside linebacker (3.36 gpa at princeton)
khamani hudson, cornerback (3.5 gpa)
bobby engstler, punter/kicker (3.72 gpa)
jonathan "gameday" brady, wide receiver (3.2 gpa)
mikey miller, wide receiver (3.8 gpa)
victor stoffel, offensive tackle (motivated student in sweden)
kadarius calloway, running back (2.7 gpa)
ryan coe, kicker (3.5 gpa)
tobias merriweather, wide receiver (3.6 gpa)
ja'ir smith, defensive back (3.0+ gpa)
syris corley, offensive lineman (3.0 gpa)
rush reimer, offensive lineman (3.3 gpa)
marcus harris, defensive back (3.2 gpa)
aidan ikaika keanaaina, defensive tackle (4.0 gpa)
aiden newbill, offensive line (3.72 gpa)
isaiah crosby, safety (3.0+ gpa)
luke ferrelli, inside linebacker (4.0 gpa)
chandler rogers, quarterback (3.3 gpa)
teddye buchanan, inside linebacker (3.5 gpa)
josiah martin, wide receiver (3.5 gpa)
jack endries, tight end (3.83 gpa)
trond grizzell, wide receiver (3.8 gpa)
bj canady, defensive tackle (3.91 gpa)
legend journey, apex predator edge defender (3.3 gpa)
ej caminong, quarterback (3.5 gpa)
dayton "dayday" aupiu, defensive back (3.51 gpa)
jamaal wiley, running back (3.0+ gpa)
trevor rogers, wide receiver (3.5 gpa)
michael-anthony okwura, defensive lineman (3.4 gpa)
eze osondu, inside linebacker (3.5 gpa)
brookyln cheek, defensive back (3.0+ gpa)
camden jones, tight end (3.0+ gpa)
tyler knape, offensive line (3.8 gpa)

2023 class:
barrett miller, offensive lineman (4.2 hs gpa & stanford mechancial engineering degree)
taj davis, wide receiver (3.2 gpa)
king doerue, running back (3.5 gpa)
isaiah ifanse, running back (3.2 gpa at montana state)
marcus scott ii, cornerback (3.3 gpa at missouri)
tidiane "frenchy" jalloh (motivated student from france)
matthew wykoff, offensive tackle (3.75 gpa)
marquez "mojo" dortch, wide receiver (2.9 gpa)
ben finley, quarterback (4.308 gpa)
patrick mcmorris, safety (3.65 gpa)
david bird, longsnapper (4.0 gpa)
marquis montgomery, wide receiver (3.4 gpa)
martin tine, offensive tackle (2.9 gpa)
stanley mckenzie, nose tackle (3.3 gpa)
david reese, outside linebacker (3.7 gpa)
sam jackson v, quarterback (2.8 gpa)
brian hightower, wide receiver (3.2 gpa)
justin williams-thomas aka j-will, running back (4.0 gpa)
asher alberding, tight end (3.85 gpa)
jt byrne, tight end (3.75 gpa)
lachlan wilson, punter (strong student from australia)
byron caldwell, running back (3.3 gpa)
sergio allen, inside linebacker (3.4 gpa)
matt littlejohn, defensive back (3.0 gpa)
javian "the jet" thomas, running back (3.4 gpa)
nohl williams, defensive back (3.61 gpa)
kaylin moore, defensive back (3.4 gpa)
frederick williams iii, offensive line (3.6 gpa)
zurich ashford, defensive end (3.62 gpa)
ben marshall, tight end (3.4 gpa)
ryan mcculloch, outside linebacker (4.1 gpa)
tiumalu afalava, defensive line (4.1 gpa)
cade uluave, inside linebacker (3.85 gpa)
sailasa vadrawale, defensive back (3.46 gpa)
nyziah hunter, wide receiver (3.0+ gpa)
nick morrow, offensive tackle (3.7 gpa)
michael luckhurst, kicker (4.37 gpa)



wow, that was quite the introduction, doechii, we're gonna have to talk after class...don't forget to take the chicken out

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (a degree is kinda like a winning LOTTERY TIX for those who wanna build GENERATIONAL WEALTH thru academic hard work)

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Shocky1
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10:53a, 11/26/24

markeisa everett: refused to work on any national billboard projects (an unqualified dei hire by knowlton)

fun fact: shocky believes in the redistribution of wealth in the united states thru ELITE academic opportunities at life changing/dream chasing institutions such as cal, stanford & the ivy leagues for those from lower socioeconomic backgrounds (such as my then poor as **** moms who worked her azz off to become a berkeley grad & 1st in her family to graduate from college) that are willing to do the HARD WORK to create GENERATIONAL WEALTH for themselves & their families, he does NOT believe in giving away FREE **** (other than safe/happy homes to them rescue doggy dogs & FREE fb & bb tixs to the thousands of broke azz berkeley students with financial debt)



knowlton, jenny & markeisha: worthless bureaucrats that are undermining cal football & basketball on a daily basis while lyons gazes out the window lost in space at a berkeley with existential financial challenges#
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12:01p, 11/26/24



let's ******* go, trev, hit somebody (try to **** with us & STEAL our **** & find out)!!#
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4:11p, 11/26/24

jonathan brady is mentally unbreakable (plus he got good hair too)#
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5:28p, 11/26/24
OFFICIAL cal's monster class bear breakdown of the 4 types of headstands:

important note: u must 1st watch the above ^ video of the touchdown celebration, got it??

1) the curvy brunette yoga female with a SMOKESHOW ponytail, this is the pininfarina battista of headstands!!!
https://instagr.am/p/DCrlfQbola9
2) the monster quick twitch +1 athletic strong stomach core (deduct points for no handstand component), this is the blue lexus convertible of headstands!! (note to liam: **** balenciaga, got it?)


3) the ******* leaning tower of pisa, this is the toyota corolla of headstands!
https://instagr.am/p/BDilZUghHeU
4) the ballgame/mikey t-rex ****show/sorry azz somersaults, this is the stolen kia with no hubcaps/license plates of headstands (ouch)




this is cal football (bow wow wow, r u my baby mama??)#
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Shocky1
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In reply to Shocky1 • 9:54p, 11/26/24
Shocky1 said:

2025 class recruiting update:

right now the bears got 14 high school commitments, the #1 junior college target on the staff's 2025 big board is jc all american 6'4" 240 lbs apex predator edge defender odera okaka from national powerhouse san mateo college (developing under coach ben hawk schrider's tutelage) & previously pittsburg high school


with both current starting outside backers david reese & the x man outta eligiblity & pursuing nfl careers after this season, there is a legit opportunity for odera to come in & be an impact starter from day 1 in berkeley...odera is a high motor violent defender that got offers from both sec & big 10 schools

odera is not a dumb azz, check out this dean's list letter


the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (including the beautiful people of nigeria and a short drive for the fam to memorial stadium on gamedays)

https://instagr.am/p/C9-HpkkI7f8
KEY 2025 class recruiting update:

odera okaka officially visited hometown cal on november 16th, kinda racist mississippi state last weekend, west virginia on october 11th & will visit penn state this weekend before making his FINAL decision as a january 2025 enrollee

there are 4 huge pluses in cal's favor:

1) the bears are losing both outside linebackers, next season ryan mcculloch (who wuz odera's host on his official visit to berkeley) is penciled in as one starter with okaka in a strong position to win the other starting apex predator edge defender job

2) the college of san mateo fightin' benjis defensive schemes (as taught by berkeley grad/future bears assistant coach ben hawk schrider) are very SIMILAR to coach sirmon's schemes...the more comfortable/familiar a player is in his new team's schemes, the faster he can play with violent SPEED

3) the cost of travel & lack of direct flights (requiring multiple connections) to remote university park, starksville & blacksburg will require thousands of dollars & 3 day trips for his fam to watch him vs the short drive (maybe 2-3 galloons of gas, $15 bucks max total cost with no airfare, hotels, rental cars or meals) from pittsburg to berkeley on gamedays

4) let's be real here, ok, all of okaka's other choices are mediocre as **** academic skools that view football players as disposable gladiators, if building GENERATIONAL WEALTH thru hard work in the classroom is a priority for odera then berkeley stands out with it's promise of a brighter future

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In reply to Shocky1 • 4:02a, 11/27/24
Shocky1 said:



let's ******* go, trev, hit somebody (try to **** with us & STEAL our **** & find out)!!#

justin channeling his inner shocky#
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7:35a, 11/27/24

https://www.espn.com/college-football/player/_/id/5161141/mateen-bhaghani

WARNING: every 2025 personnel decision is critical, WINS & LOSSES r on the line!!

https://instagr.am/p/DAg5EMWJM8M
don't be a dumb azz#
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8:48a, 11/27/24
https://instagr.am/p/C7Na5JCPF1L
berkeley grad/fellow epicurean (see 5th foto ^) ben coleman is gonna return for a 17th college football season next year (he blueshirted in berkeley in 2019)

coleman is asu's highest graded offensive lineman per pff & has allowed ZERO sacks this season & only 2 hurries, POW!!

ben's moms is an asu grad so moving to tempe after earning a berkeley degree wuz always the gameplan which wuz cemented by the sorry azz technical coaching he received due to wilcox's dumb azz hiring of angus who followed grandpa greatwood who spent 5 minutes a week recruiting

dumb **** coaching hires got consequences

forks up#
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Shocky1
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9:14a, 11/27/24

trev clocked at 17 mph (do NOT steal on superman's watch, congrats to cali on prop 36)!!#
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Shocky1
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9:43a, 11/27/24


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Econ141
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9:54a, 11/27/24
Give to Cal Legends!

https://calegends.com/donation/ Do it now. Text every Cal fan you know, give them the link, tell them how much you gave, and ask them to text every Cal fan they know and do the same.
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Shocky1
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9:55a, 11/27/24

u STEAL, u get ****** up!!#
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Shocky1
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10:02a, 11/27/24
econ, deja vu (haha)

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Shocky1
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2:13p, 11/27/24

left to right: gisella "super lefty" maul, michelle "impose ur will" onyiah, kayla "the roadrunner" williams, lulu "let it fly" twidale, ionna "mykonos" krimili & lola "lockdown defender" donez

california golden bears 74
arizona wildcats 62

ugonne foul watch: 2 fouls on contested shots & a critical potential 3rd one (that would've sent michelle to the bench) that wuz remarkably not called by the refs when onyiah went vertical defensively but gotta lotta body on the wildcat driver...25 points on a redunkulous 11 of 14 field goals plus a dominating 13 rebounds...michelle is finally starting to figure **** out (not blaming the refs for all her past seasons dumb azz fouls is a good starting point) & beginning to fulfill the shocky prophecy of stardom


most insightful quote of the coach charmin era: "michelle is one of the best post players in the nation when she does what she's supposed to do"

the x-factor: the cal bench needs to provide a lot more production if this team is gonna successfully compete in the acc & make a run in march madness, texas transfer gisella maul's clutch 10 points, 4 boards & only 1 turnover in 20 minutes wuz the winning difference in this afternoon's bears win


the great barrier ocean reef: watching lulu twidale's beautiful SMILE & drain 4 of 8 3 pointers along with a perfect 6 of 6 free throws en route to 18 points is a joy to watch but more impressively she took a brutal violent collision & came back later to compete...lulu is UNBREAKABLE both mentally & physically!!


question of the day: how does the shortest person on the court get 7 rebounds??...answer: kayla williams is a roadrunner, BEEP BEEP!!

turnover watch: 21 turnovers is gonna lose a lotta acc games, the next week's practices need to focus physically on passing drills & tape review of the cognitive angles/decision making of those passes

next opponent: nationally ranked alabama is gonna invade haas pavillion on thursday december 5th, a sec victory will likely earn the bears a spot in the top 25 rankings...will the fans show up & will innovative marketing (will markeisha & knowlton get off their lazy azzs??) sell this fascinating program that gotta opportunity to be SPECIAL this season??



sweat equity (who r u honoring??)#

^ fun fact: shocky selected berkeley over stanford & multiple ivy league actionable offers to honor the legacy of his back in the day poor as **** tiger moms who grew up above a dry cleaner in san francisco & tirelessly worked her azz off to become a berkeley grad & the 1st person in her family to earn any college degree
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Shocky1
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2:27p, 11/27/24

just read the latest email installment of Knowlton Knows Nothing Notes which once again includes no financial information, budgetary gameplan and/or future plans to rightsize the # of sports team in order to stop the bleeding from the current $50,000,000+ deficit which will only increase with the reduced acc revenues & the upcoming $20,500,000 nil payouts

yeah the con artist is an arrogant ****tard of an athletic director that has intentionally underfunded/worked against the football program, lied repeatedly about the mythical basketball practice facility & most recently conspired with his #2 confidante jennifer simon-o'neil to ask the campus legal counsel to offer an opinion if the upcoming $20,500,000 nil payouts gotta be equally shared with the quidditch team making it the ONLY university in the nation doing so & effectively ending cal football as we know it

the worthless bureaucrat (wants u to donate to his athletic dept to pay a bunch of administrative salaries)#
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Shocky1
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5:08p, 11/27/24

cal's monster offensive line recruiting update:

2025 current georgia tech commit 6'5" 290 lbs guard justin hasenhueti from koln, deustchland & currently attending rabun gap-nacoochee high school in rural northeast georgia (kinda near clemson) took an official trip to berkeley...shocky saw him pregame on the field & can confirm he's constructed like autobahn collision road grader!!


but yeah justin is not my favorite german

https://instagr.am/p/C2deK6DLdJr
justin hasenhueti is NOT a dumb azz, he got a 3.75 gpa with english as a 2nd language!!...where's georgia tech on this world list & why is it so ******* humid (with nasty azz bugs) in atlanta more than half the year??...sorry lance but putting on bug spray before teeing off at peachtree is not a lotta fun


the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (and the home of midnite city)



sei kein dummer azz#
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Shocky1
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8:06a, 11/28/24
https://instagr.am/p/DC48UYlRESU
today's cal football program itinerary:

*****am practice at memorial stadium with chandler rogers throwing moneyballs to nyziah hunter

*****race at the speed of the light to the oakland airport with lachlan wilson forgetting to take clean underwear that are all monogrammed with kangaroos

*****wheels up with co pilots sioape vatikani & stanley mackenzie even tho they don't know how to read aviation maps & ****

*****coach bloesch texts shocky to tell him he's never gonna call a PITCHOUT as long as he lives on planet earth

*****land in dallas, team buses stop at buc-ee's in denton for bbq brisket sandwiches, jamaal wiley is the only person to get a slushee

*****reboard buses & arrive at the team hotel in frisco (same one as the north texas roadie last season), matthew littlejohn gets assigned room #6277

****team thanksgiving dinner with team mascot buc-ee & josiah martin presenting an enlightening 5 minute joint talk on how to pick up girls (like megan thee stallion) at buc-ee's...jt bryne & hunter barth don't pay any attention cuz they're married or something


*****dinner ends in a ****show with the frisco police called out when trev mistakenly thinks coach wilcox is pocketing/STEALING a couple of salt packets & runs him down almost to the dining room door with increased 18 mph speed & violently uppercuts the packets outta his hands...vals captures this all on video & wins the 1st of her many oscar awards for creative documentaries (fyi after playing in the nfl with PITCHOUTS jaydn ott becomes an adult movie star with the screen name doggy dog)

*****josh drayden is named interim head football coach for the smu game after wilcox is arrested/led away in handcuffs & he tells the team he will ****** go for it on every 4th down under 4 yards regardless of field position and/or the score, team goes wild!!

*****1:30 am clothing optional (clothes r for losers) pool party (coaches not invited) with dozens of smu curvy brunette yoga females that wanna date & marry cal, stanford & ivy league grads when they enter the real world that unapologetically favors the well educated in building GENERATIONAL WEALTH

https://instagr.am/p/C0kXT3fvA9u


the kill (at smu by the university of calveston)#
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bencgilmore
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In reply to Shocky1 • 11:04a, 11/28/24
Shocky1 said:
^ benny, this **** is getting LIVE!!

https://instagr.am/p/BqW3p1zHSmC
the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the WORLD (including ewa beach)


^ where's oregon on this list??

don't be a dumb azz#


Did brady take your headstand for his TD celly?
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