Zippergate said:
Come in like you're still for Ukraine in this. Even bump up their weapons a little bit. Then, when in more of a position of strength, get Ukraine to negotiate a peace deal with the Rooskies. As a bargaining chip, promise that Ukraine will never be in NATO, as long as they are allowed to remain a neutral sovereign state.
Make a deal in which Putin gets a little something in order to save face, but not so much that he looks like a big winner. Make a deal to work with Russia where we share common interests (such as anti-terrorism), but they need to stop the election interference and minimize the nasty spying. Tell Putin he can still push his enemies out of windows for all we care, but it's got to be his people, in his country.
Instead, we've already capitulated, basically, thus giving Putin a better point from which to negotiate.
Had the US/NATO affirmed Ukraine's neutrality and renounced further NATO expansion, the invasion never would have happened. So were the million lives lost on both sides worth it?
I think your belief that more weapons and aide will bring Russia to the table is sadly not grounded in reality. Russia is winning a war of attrition. No amount of NATO weapons can reverse the numerical manpower advantage that Russia has. Having suffered hundreds of thousands of casualties, I don't think the Russians will be bullied into accepting less than they think they deserve.
No, this war hasn't been worth it. However, if the alternative was to roll over and play dead and let Russia take all of Ukraine, that doesn't seem so great either.
Despite the costs (again, not worth it), there have nonetheless been some ancillary benefits for the US:
+ the Pentagon got to see where we need to modernize (to avoid "fighting the last war" next time)
+ we got to see the Russian military in action and learned a lot about their strengths and weaknesses
+ sent a message to China and others that, if they plan to invade a sovereign state, there will be a heavy cost
Our best move would have been to head this off at the pass, years and years ago, but we failed to do that.