cal's monster offensive line

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Shocky1
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cal's monster offensive line!!!
Shocky1
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Shocky1
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mr sun angel just texted me, asu staff just walked to their car

Shocky1
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Shocky1 said:


spoke with nick alftin's moms, she's a lotta fun & says nick is open to potentially to returning to the program for a 6th season if a scholly is still available, those talks will happen next week

alftin is the consummate team player & a special teams standout, he's one of those few guys who absolutely loves the game of football & is a true student athlete at the university of california, berkeley for all the right reasons

if nick lived around the corner from me i would definitely trade him a colorful yoga mat for some of his gloves or something

nick alftin=future commissioner of the national football league
words do not adequately describe the love & dedication that nick alftin has gifted the cal football program thru the years, mark my words you will be hearing about this remarkable berkeley graduate in the decades to come as he makes his indelible mark on planet earth

but reality is that coach spav's offense is geared more towards electric wide receivers and slash & gone running backs than formations with multiple bad azz tight ends

a hungry bear on the loose (let's ******* go, baby)#
Shocky1
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Shocky1
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can't believe this **** dept: undersized & limited skillset notre dame transfer drew pyne is gonna be a sun devil

hopefully pyne will somehow against all odds win the asu starting quarterback job when cal plays them in 2023 which will allow coach sirmon to rewrite history (the worstest schemed d gameplan during his time in berkeley) to aggressively blitz the **** out of the jittery d3 college junkballer

forks up (at modern yoga)#
calumnus
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Shocky1 said:

Shocky1 said:


spoke with nick alftin's moms, she's a lotta fun & says nick is open to potentially to returning to the program for a 6th season if a scholly is still available, those talks will happen next week

alftin is the consummate team player & a special teams standout, he's one of those few guys who absolutely loves the game of football & is a true student athlete at the university of california, berkeley for all the right reasons

if nick lived around the corner from me i would definitely trade him a colorful yoga mat for some of his gloves or something

nick alftin=future commissioner of the national football league
words do not adequately describe the love & dedication that nick alftin has gifted the cal football program thru the years, mark my words you will be hearing about this remarkable berkeley graduate in the decades to come as he makes his indelible mark on planet earth

but reality is that coach spav's offense is geared more towards electric wide receivers and slash & gone running backs than formations with multiple bad azz tight ends

a hungry bear on the loose (let's ******* go, baby)#


I'd like to see Spavital also have a jumbo set option with big TEs for short yardage/red zone or just as a change up.
Shocky1
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100% agreed calumnus, the only real weakness of the sonny dykes/coach spav offensive fireworks era of let's drop 50 was the failure to impose our will inside the red zone, hopefully coach spav will remedy that with heavy jumbo rumble packages with tight ends jermaine terry & elijah mojarro in 2023 (hopefully ben marshall is reading this while pressing iron in his garage after passing on a late nite snack with his hs teammates at shoneys)
Shocky1
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Shocky1 said:

Shocky1 said:

The_Tedford_Era said:

@Shocky1 u boys talkin bout the barracuda again?
https://instagr.am/p/CZ2e8pALKmd
what up tedford (who also just signed up for this site today)?

as u know sexy fish is more about the ambiance & people watching than the barracuda

https://instagr.am/p/CgKDDIUpUdR
tunmise adeleye is gonna make his public announcement in the next couple of hours, he's definitely vibing with miami after getting caught up in the emotion of dining at prime 112 on ocean drive with the hurricanes offensive line coach/former dolphins ("fans" dropped by constantly to see their "hero," not sure if tunmise fully understands this could all be staged for him, his dad, moms & girlfriend)

there are a lot of great culinary/eye candy watching spots in miami like prime 112 & sexy fish, that's not why you pick a college...in today's fiercely global competitive marketplace, those with world class educations like cal, stanford & the ivy league are much more likely to have the financial means to dine at places like prime 112 & sexy fish...those with lesser educations often work as valets & bouncers at such establishments


decision with 50 year financial implications#
what up tunmise?

we all make mistakes in life, you made a major one outta high school chasing nil dollars in a dysfunctional football program at texas a&m

now ur leaning towards michigan state, r u serious?

check out the forbes united states collegiate rankings, ok?...cal is tied with stanford as the #2 ranked university in the nation, texas a&m is #52 and michigan state is a distant #81
https://www.forbes.com/top-colleges/

a michigan state degree is gonna set you up to be nite shift supervisor at the lansing truck stop, is that ur goal in life?

got it, michigan state is offering more nil dollars than everybody including cal & miami now but didn't you already make that mistake chasing nil dollars outta high school?

do the math, a cal, stanford or ivy league degree is worth millions of dollars over a lifetime more than a michigan state degree, right?...doesn't that outweigh nil tens of thousands dollars for an almost worthless piece of paper that won't open many doors once football is done with you?

r u for sale?

tunmise, not even t grizzly is gonna pray on ur downfall, you've already seen this movie, don't watch it again amigo



don't wanna be broke azz poor at 30 (50 year decision)#
JTfromClash
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Don't think he reading this Shocky5
Shocky1
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jt, u would be mistaken
Shocky1
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sleep is for losers#
Shocky1
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congrats to damien moore on offers from unlv & umass, gotta earn a degree (football snaps are a bonus)
Shocky1
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https://instagr.am/p/Clhz6CMrtJ_
coach bloesch gotta target 6'5" 302 lbs 3 year washington state starting left tackle jarrett kingston from anderson (just south of redding, 3+ hour drive to berkeley on gamedays) who just entered the portal after his season was shut down on november 5th after a lower body injury & famously proposed to his now fiance on the field on november 28th

kingston is a social science major & is seeking some nil wedding/new family financial support

the cal staff is currently reviewing the following exclusive gameday footage of jarrett kingston aggressively showing powerful quick strike high twitch movement while imposing his will

cal's monster offensive line#

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (including shasta county)
Shocky1
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Shocky1
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exclusive footage of ashton hayes 1st running carry of the 2023 season in denton texas vs them north texas mean greenies...give this speedster a running lane/window & he gone


where's ashton? (he gone)#
Shocky1
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the monster would show you exclusive playing time epic touchdown runs by ashtron stredick who is the future of cal football but coach thompson don't ever give him any snaps

don't be a dumb azz (in 2023)#
Shocky1
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yeah some people don't know what they don't know
Shocky1
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Shocky1 said:

calfanz, ethan is unlikely leave his hometown to play for his 3rd college, did you know his dad played golf at michigan back in the day?

good seeing you on the practice green in north scottsdale a week or so ago, love that your still passionate about cal basketball, you know deep in your soul what's the magic of cal basketball

so my daughter taylor is in town from nyc & we both want to go to haas (which i've not stepped foot in over 5 years since my termination after attending 150+ consecutive games in a row in my role as the director of recruiting/gameday energy via cal's monster class) this wednesday for what will be a magical victory that will garner national attention for the program

sent an email last nite to beth asking if taylor & i can buy for the game our 2 old floor seats directly across from the opposing team's head coach...haven't heard back yet, she probably gotta check with the athletic director or something...it might make sense to invite former floor seats donors to become reengaged with the basketball program

there are multiple former players (my former recruits) that have already told me they will attend if taylor & her dumb azz dad r in the haas in the next 48 hours

in retrospect cal's monster class wuz shocky's love letter to cal basketball, too bad that love these days is returned in its envelope as undeliverable

yeah haas will forever be my palace, what's ur palace?




many thx to beth tafolla-voetsch & matthew hornerkamp in sorting out the opportunity for me & taylor stepping inside of my palace tomorrow for the first time in 6 years

we're gonna watch early warm ups at 3:15 am, would love to chat with anybody that wants to do the hang with us then

and if our california golden bears win, you know what's gonna ******* happen, rite?



the magic of cal basketball (shocky's love letter to cal basketball got answered)#
Shocky1
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the shockster is excited to see again (we've stayed in touch thru the years) future son in law brenden glapion...he's a mutt (half black/half japanese) like the monster

that's how the world works, curvy brunette yoga females (like taylor) from academically mediocre schools (like asu) wanna date & marry cal, stanford & ivy league grads (like brenden) when they enter the real world (like now) & they need someone (preferably kind, helpful & strong) to take the trash out for them on garbage days & take them shopping (with a credit card) at restoration hardware on weekends

https://instagr.am/p/Ci7_-Q9pr3G
only issue is that taylor loves new york city, anybody know if gunderson dettmer got an office in manhattan?
https://www.gunder.com/brenden-glapion/

shut up, dad (worsest dad of all time)#
Fire Starkey
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Are you drunk right now?
Pittstop
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I wasted my time scrolling through every comment posted on this thread today (and yesterday) in hopes that MAYBE I might find SOMETHING of substance regarding Cal FB recruiting. Nada. Zip. Is this strictly an erstwhile 'entertainment' thread that will sometimes post recruiting info AFTER it has been posted elsewhere?
Shocky1
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Fire Starkey said:

Are you drunk right now?
fire stinky, shocky is a pretty lite drinker, he's not very uninhibited in social settings

but enuf about me, how's ur doctorate in women's feminism studies going?
Shocky1
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pittstop=angry dude that's a poor clues reader that hasn't palmed any azz in a long time
Shocky1
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Shocky1 said:

loosely edited transcript from 12:42 pm on saturday september 10th, 2022 at memorial stadium:

4th gen bear (waving at me, he sits 3 rows down on the 50 yard line in around the 25th row): hey shocky, get over here, there's somebody i want you to meet, joel brown

shocky (fist bumping): what up, joel, ima shocky, your my favorite player, you gotta lotta energy except when you dribble with you head down to nowhere

joel: well, thanks i guess

shocky: so what's your gpa?

joel: pretty good, i'm going to graduate from the haas business school

shocky : me too, glad your not a dumb azz, are you working on your crooked azz shooting?

4th gen bear is kinda shaking his head, how did this conversation go so far off the rails he's wondering

shocky: hey randy should hook you up with his friend who is the shooting whisperer, don't be fooled by the fact that he's a girl's high school basketball coach at pinewood high school, he knows his stuff

joel: well actually coach fox has been working with me on my stroke this summer, this is my first real summer staying in berkeley

shocky: show me

joel demonstrates the new stroker for the shockster with an imaginary basketball, his elbow is perpendicular to the basket kinda like pure shooters j-mat and the bird, there's no more of that protruding chicken elbow that has marred his stroke in past seasons

shocky (getting excited): dude, that stroke is a 1000% better, your the only +1 athlete on the team, there's literally no reason you can't attack the baket this season knowing you can knock down the free throws when you get hacked by defenders that are gonna be a step too late to your blur game...what's gonna be your free throw percentage this season?

joel (with a big azz smile): thanks, hope to shoot in the high 80s this season...think in the past i kinda let the mental part of shooting bother me too much plus maybe i wasn't in as good as shape and my legs let me down particularly late in games

shocky (nodding his head): yeah your shot has been way too flat during your time in berkeley, do you know where your shots miss, are you familiar with splatter charts?

joel: no

shocky: splatter charts are used in the nba by scouts and player development coaches to determine where shots are missed, are they left or right which is a huge red flag or are they missed long or short?

joel (deep in thought): last season most of my misses were usually short

shocky: right and that's because your shots had too low of a flat trajectory because of the chicken wing stroke and also because you weren't driving with your legs fluidly thru the stroke...dude, your good to go now, can't wait to see you ball out this season

joel: thanks, really looking forward to playing with our improved talent this season, playing with devin askew is gonna be really fun

shocky: well, that's good to hear, i got high hopes for you joel, do you speak canadian?





the magic of cal basketball (cal's monster class)#

joel, gonna be coaching u up tomorrow evening, ur stroke looks pure, confidence is everything

let it fly, baby#
89Bear
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Shocky1 said:

Shocky1 said:

calfanz, ethan is unlikely leave his hometown to play for his 3rd college, did you know his dad played golf at michigan back in the day?

good seeing you on the practice green in north scottsdale a week or so ago, love that your still passionate about cal basketball, you know deep in your soul what's the magic of cal basketball

so my daughter taylor is in town from nyc & we both want to go to haas (which i've not stepped foot in over 5 years since my termination after attending 150+ consecutive games in a row in my role as the director of recruiting/gameday energy via cal's monster class) this wednesday for what will be a magical victory that will garner national attention for the program

sent an email last nite to beth asking if taylor & i can buy for the game our 2 old floor seats directly across from the opposing team's head coach...haven't heard back yet, she probably gotta check with the athletic director or something...it might make sense to invite former floor seats donors to become reengaged with the basketball program

there are multiple former players (my former recruits) that have already told me they will attend if taylor & her dumb azz dad r in the haas in the next 48 hours

in retrospect cal's monster class wuz shocky's love letter to cal basketball, too bad that love these days is returned in its envelope as undeliverable

yeah haas will forever be my palace, what's ur palace?




many thx to beth tafolla-voetsch & matthew hornerkamp in sorting out the opportunity for me & taylor stepping inside of my palace tomorrow for the first time in 6 years

we're gonna watch early warm ups at 3:15 am, would love to chat with anybody that wants to do the hang with us then

and if our california golden bears win, you know what's gonna ******* happen, rite?



the magic of cal basketball (shocky's love letter to cal basketball got answered)#


Will you be wearing your pink shirt?
Shocky1
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Shocky1 said:

mr sun angel is telling me that the sales pitch to the Iheanachor family is that both maxwell & his young brother mark (senior at narbonne high school) can play together in tempe



asu's sun angels community is 100% more committed to rebuilidng their football program via nil funding which has grown exponentially in the last month with dilly's youthful enthusiasm

the lucrative financial counteroffer (best & final) to the iheanachor family after the favorable official visit to berkeley sealed the deal along with the financial assurances for maxwell's younger brother mark along with no academic admissions requirements/hoops to jump thru

basically right now the sun angels do not intend to be outbid for player services by anybody in the pac 12 other than usc, oregon & maybe ucla with casey wasserman (his wife laura ziffren is a berkeley grad) opening his checkbook for 5 star quarterback dante moore

you throw in smokin' hot females, great nightlife & weather & non strenuous academics and those are all factors in why ben coleman, decarlos brooks, slater zellers & both iheanachor brothers are now gonna be sun devils

reality is that new offensive line coach mike bloesch is just starting to build relationships with prospective offensive lineman that were not even on his radar at north texas...mike made $279,000 last year in denton & ima still very optimistic that he's gonna coach up his room for spring ball

reality is also that the best solution (from an immediate impact standpoint) for cal's monster offensive line when billy m & angus were walked to their cars would've been hiring washington scott huff (made $708,000 last year in seattle) as the co offensive coordinator/offensive line coach for $1,000,000+...but cal's athletic director does not want to significantly invest in the football program with athletic department dollars & insisted donors foot the majority of the billl for the new offensive coordinator so he could retain his title ix sports empire of dirt

like the basketball program, the challenges of the football program with respects to recruiting all lead back to james arthur knowlton
Shocky1
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89Bear said:




Will you be wearing your pink shirt?
no
Econ141
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Shocky1 said:

Shocky1 said:

mr sun angel is telling me that the sales pitch to the Iheanachor family is that both maxwell & his young brother mark (senior at narbonne high school) can play together in tempe



asu's sun angels community is 100% more committed to rebuilidng their football program via nil funding which has grown exponentially in the last month with dilly's youthful enthusiasm

the lucrative financial counteroffer (best & final) to the iheanachor family after the favorable official visit to berkeley sealed the deal along with the financial assurances for maxwell's younger brother mark along with no academic admissions requirements/hoops to jump thru

basically right now the sun angels do not intend to be outbid for player services by anybody in the pac 12 other than usc, oregon & maybe ucla with casey wasserman (his wife laura ziffren is a berkeley grad) opening his checkbook for 5 star quarterback dante moore

you throw in smokin' hot females, great nightlife & weather & non strenuous academics and those are all factors in why ben coleman, decarlos brooks, slater zellers & both iheanachor brothers are now gonna be sun devils

reality is that new offensive line coach mike bloesch is just starting to build relationships with prospective offensive lineman that were not even on his radar at north texas...mike made $279,000 last year in denton & ima still very optimistic that he's gonna coach up his room for spring ball

reality is also that the best solution (from an immediate impact standpoint) for cal's monster offensive line when billy m & angus were walked to their cars would've been hiring washington scott huff (made $708,000 last year in seattle) as the co offensive coordinator/offensive line coach for $1,000,000+...but cal's athletic director does no want to significantly invest in the football program with athletic department dollars & insisted donors foot the majority of the billl for the new offensive coordinator so he could retain his title ix sports empire of dirt

like the basketball program, the challenges of the football program with respects to recruiting all lead back to james arthur knowlton


Discouraging to say the least. We need some buzz fast. UCLA just got a 4* TE to transfer in from Oregon. They have demonstrated that they want to compete in football. I don't need to see anymore tweets from players saying essentially "thanks cal for entertaining me" ... We need some power commits fast. Spavital is too quiet. Why?

Knowlton is and will always remain an idiot. Singlehandedly destroying the entire program. Do we have no donors that can slap him around a bit?
Shocky1
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Shocky1 said:

Shocky1 said:

Shocky1 said:



big weekend in atlanta, multiple prioritized official visitors are leaning towards gt commitments including linebackers ezra odinjor from acworth, nacari ashley from marietta, taye seymore from atlanta & minnesota transfer braelen oliver

buzz b stocking the linebacker hive#

nacari ashley & braelen oliver committed to gt tonite
texas a&m transfer portal linebacker andre white jr just committed to gt

there's no more room at linebacker at georgia tech unless someone decomits tonite

this means georgia native sergio allen can either try to reopen his portal recruitment in january & take his chances with getting offered official visits/actionable offers or sign with them california golden bears tomorrow

can pittstop deduce them clues?#

Shocky1
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Shocky1 said:


6'1" 230 lbs clemson transfer inside linebacker sergio allen from peach county high school in fort valley georgia is on an official visit to cal today

with jackson sirmon presiding over the eye of the hurricane in the middle of the field, the bears d needs another insider backer to step forward & claim the adjacent starting position this spring after femi's departure to ucla

the vaunted tigers recruit out of high school is not a dumb azz, he's majoring in sociology & completed internships with adobe & first rate in england this spring

growing up & living in the south his entire life, sergio is hopefully looking for a cali adventure at the epicenter of the free speech & civil rights movements...kinda worked out ok for my yoga buddy jaylen brown



the university of california, berkeley=#2 ranked university in the united states
https://www.forbes.com/top-colleges/

monster crystal ball to cal
Shocky1
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Shocky1 said:

Shocky1 said:

Shocky1 said:


coach spav has made the decision to offer 6' 194 lbs university of louisiana monroe portal transfer quarterback chandler rogers who got 2 years of remaining eligibility

this season rogers had an impressive qb rating of 141.67 (against mediocre opponents) with an accurate 67.5% completion rate for 2403 yards with 15 touchdowns & 7 interceptions while also rushing for 607 yards, dude got wheels

will be interesting to see if chandler takes an official visit to berkeley this weekend...
chandler, ur gonna luv the palm trees at the claremont this weekend, palms are my favorite trees & the looming palm tree by the iconic short par 4 18th hole & the olympic club's clubhouse always makes me smile

https://instagr.am/p/ClofoVEO_8R
what's ur favorite tree?#
chandler, don't tell nobody but u were a 3 year honoree on the dean's list at mansfield high school back in the day, that's kinda important admissions information at the #1 ranked public university in the world

and ur really fast with quick bursts of acceleration which is kinda important given that cal's monster offensive line wuz not great last season in protecting the quarterback

not totally sure but kinda guessing they don't got palm tree breakfast burritos at the claremont this morning but who knows (never hurts to ask, rite)?

let's have an adventure, yeah it's sweater weather in cali


palm trees r beautiful#


monster crystal ball to cal
Shocky1
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4.0 gpa offensive guard isaiah kema to oklahoma state
Shocky1
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wisconsin 5 star offensive tackle/knockout champ flipped from kansas to alabama
sonofabear51
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Jeebus,fire Knowlton and Fox already.
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