cal's monster offensive line

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rkt88edmo
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In reply to Econ141 • 9:02p, 12/21/22
Econ141 said:



Damn - this must mean another portal qb coming in or that Kai was going to be the man next year ... Or Plummer saw that we couldn't get any immediate help on the OL so he is bailing. If the latter, I am worried about our other skill position players namey Ott and JMike.
Aaargh, hope it's the former and not the latter...

ROLL ON YOU (new) BEARS!!!

and don't forget to take the chicken out.

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Pittstop
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In reply to Shocky1 • 9:37p, 12/21/22
Well, Shockster, this IS the kind of recruiting info we all come her for. Fantastic signings,,and absolutely great news for "them California Golden Bears". However, you can't claim it as 'breaking news', as this info was posted on TOS at 8:47 am and 9:01 am, respectively. So maybe you saw it there first. And maybe not. Who's to know. But good job nevertheless. And, by the way, I do enjoy reading the Monster Offensive Line thread...most of the time. At the very least there is frequent entertainment value to be had here.
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Shocky1
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In reply to Shocky1 • 10:47p, 12/21/22
Shocky1 said:
exclusive footage of shocky's failed attempt to storm folsom field:

shocky's 1st shocky's 1st substitute yoga teacher closing class namaste fail#
fun early evening victory while sitting on the floor with taylor & conversing with those that still love the magic of cal basketball & later a tasty perfectly prepared culinary experience with future son in law brenden glapion at fino in san francisco

my coaching efforts paid off handsomely, joel did a great job of attacking the rim with his blinding footspeed & "letting it fly" without any negative thoughts, my favorite canadian was totaled dialed in plus he got good hair

lars also played with freedom in response to the "demand the ball" & "impose your will" instructions tho he did seem puzzled by my constant yelling "lars, sprechen sie deutsch?"

taylor was very upset with the refs decision to call a defensive foul in the paint on freshman walk on jack mccloskey in the final half a minute, "he's trying so hard, it's mean to call a foul on him when he's obviously doing his best"

can't make this **** up

so all during the 2nd half the shockster relentlessly speaks with everybody on our end of the floor seats facing the opposing team's bench, literally everybody tole me they would join me in stormin' the floor if the bears won the game

as the final buzzer echoes the shockster sprints kinda marshawn jaunty bowlegged style to the center of his universe, mid court at haas pavillion, this is truly the palace

but guess what?

nobody followed him which taylor thought was pretty funny

anyways the security team surrounds me & mr head yellow jacket tells me in an apologetic voice that i got gotta my azz of the court

yeah the monster is zero for two this year in stormin' the field/court

the magic of cal basketball (should not involve bond $ for criminal felony trespassing/failure to stop)#
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Shocky1
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In reply to Shocky1 • 11:11p, 12/21/22
Shocky1 said:
monster state of the union for the california golden bears football program:

so like the 2022 season, the 2023 season will be determined by cal's monster offensive line and there are plenty of questions that need to be addressed & solved starting with winter conditioning & then 2023 spring ball:

1) will matthew cindric return for another season or medically retire?

2) will the staff sign an immediate impact offensive lineman portal transfer this upcoming january?

3) what corrective steps will coach brian johnson take in adjusting his past winter conditioning failures which has resulted in the o-line room lacking strength, bend, mobility & quick twitch movements across the board in 2022?

4) how much physical/technique improvement will we see from 2022 starters brayden rhome and tj sessions during spring ball with coach bloesch?

5) will brian driscoll u haul his gameday attitude from la jolla to national city?

6) will poly bad azz sioape vatikani fulfill his potential as a 1st team all pac guard in 2023?

7) are jackson brown & trent ramsey ready to compete for the starting/playing rotation tackle jobs this spring?...how much will the fastest footspeed tackle in the program grayshirt nick morrow weigh when he arrives in berkeley this january?

8) are physically gifted bastian swinney & mountain man spencer lovell gonna be healthy by spring ball?

9) will one of the other scholly offensive linemen such as everett johnson or ender aguilar emerge as a reliable rotation player(s)?...are buried on the depth chart strong student athletes ryan lange & dylan jemtegaard still interested in competing on the football field or just focusing on their berkeley studies?

10) will role will future head coach in waiting mike saffell play moving forwrard?

totally understand that fans like to talk about a lotta different aspects of the cal football program but the reality is that the difference between a 3-4 win season and a 8-10+ major bowl 2023 season is gonna be cal's monster offensive line

real talk#

shocky spoke with everybody in floor seats on his side of the court including future head coach in waiting mike saffell, tireless innovator marshall cherrington & numerous others with knowledge of cal's monster offensive line...coach wilcox wuz also in the haas talking to oligopolist califortunate

these are some of the answers to the above 10 questions:

1) the biggest news of the day was not the 14 signings in "cal's 2023 yucky blucky fruitcake class" or jack plummer's emotional decision to enter the portal...matthew cindric told the staff today he's gonna return for the 2023 season, he's gonna be the fearless leader of our revamped cal's monster class...love this guy but probably not as much as his girlfriend
https://instagr.am/p/Ci_yTDEuvsE
2) there is confidence that there are a meaningful number of athletic offensive linemen in the portal that can also compete in the classrooms of berkeley...there will be a focused effort to recruit a portal transfer lineman not only this january but also a portal transfer when it reopens after spring ball

3) this surprised me a lot but there's no plan to materially change the o-line room's winter conditioning with coach johnson...but there is a plan for players to be more invested with greater intensity

4) there is recognition that brayden rhome can't play next season at 285 lbs, gotta get bigger/stronger & there is also great optimism re: the upside for tj sessions now that he's made the jump to pac 12 battles

5) it was pointed out to me that brian had a couple of unnecessary violence penalties late in the season, would still feel a whole lot better if driscoll would rob a gas station or something this offseason

6) there is nobody on planet earth including the cal football program that don't love sioape

7) all 3 freshman tackles are gonna be given every opportunity to show their stuff during spring ball

8) did not get any clear answers on bastian swinney but wuz told that early season starter spencer lovell has made the decision to return to berkeley for the 2023 season

9) no news at this time

10) future head coach in waiting mike saffell confirmed he will be staying with the cal football program after his graduate assistant run, he's excited re: the opportunity to be mentored/coached up by coach bloesch
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Big C
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11:20p, 12/21/22

Shocky, was that you in the green shoes and could you hear me yelling towards your right ear, from about a court's length distance away (i'm curious how far my voice travels in a gym with hundreds of other people in it)?
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11:38p, 12/21/22
hey big c, heard ur roaring the entire game but where wuz u when it wuz time to storm the court?

if u didn't bring any bail money or something kinda understand ur decision to respect law & order but still

big c (a sentinel)=javert#



in the darkness there is a fugitive running (fallen from grace) towards the center of paradise (they must pay the price)#
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HoopDreams
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11:46p, 12/21/22
good to see the Shockster back in his Palace, and chatting up everyone including the security guard who walked him off the court after the one man court storm

also good to see the big smiles on the players faces during and after their blow out win

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Shocky1
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11:52p, 12/21/22

anybody else think that matt bouza gotta couple curvy brunette yoga female daughters?

maybe matt could set up our head coach with one of them or something

shut up, shocky (ima tired of ur nosy azz ****)#
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Shocky1
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7:49a, 12/22/22
interesting to note that freddy williams the 3rd is signed as an athlete, he gonna get the opportunity to play in the future either on the defensive line or perhaps cal's monster offensive line...only rubi rose knows for sure

bringing in athletic +1 athletes for their size like fw3 & nick morrow (played tight end/defensive end at flagstaff high school) & converting them to mobile o-linemen makes a lotta sense


all eyes on cal's monster offensive line (from hollywood to the grand canyon)#
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Shocky1
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8:04a, 12/22/22
the bears are gonna be fine at quarterback for the 2023 spring ball, this is all gonna be sorted out in the next 30 days with a positive outcome

worrying in life is for losers (get nekkid & take a bath/shower with ur favorite human that protects u in a safe zone instead with a curl up spoonable sleepy time nap afterwards, ok?)#

billy wants a kiss#
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Shocky1
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8:10a, 12/22/22


this is a sorta friendly message/tutorial to all the fellow dumb azzs that wuz in haas/our palace yesterday evening for the bears epic victory

watch both of these videos carefully & take notes like u wuz at wheeler hall, this is how u ******* storm the floor, ok?

u don't send a 1 person broken down sorry azz fearless storm the floor "team" out there, got it?



next time, do better, got it?#
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In reply to Shocky1 • 8:45a, 12/22/22
Shocky1 said:
this was recently sent to me by one of jabari's former teammates, we are still wondering how we missed his emotional anxiety issues & think if maybe we were all paying closer attention and not so wrapped up in our own lives we could've intervened & helped the bird receive the counseling/treatment he needed

i used to encourage jabari all the time to get a yoga/meditation practice like me & jaylen, told him it would help with his chronic back issues & also clear his mind for purposeful tranquility while shooting 3 pointers...he would always nod his head & tell me "yeah I gotta do that"...once jabari shared with me that his then girlfriend at the time kelli hayes (ucla women's basketball team) loved yoga too & was always trying to get him to go too but for reasons he couldn't even explain to himself that he never got around to taking her up on her gift & they slowly drifted apart (jabari never struck me as very introspective like so many of his teammates & therefore perhaps not as empathetic)

the hawaii ncca tournament pregame back spasms in retrospect were a major red flag that something wasn't right

there is consensus among his teammates that the news of his parent's unexpected divorce (his quiet stoic dad carl played for the bears back in the day, his moms tonya with her beautiful smile & expressive eyes was so easy to chat with on game days at haas, she would roll her eyes & tell me that her son still expected her to take his college laundry home for washing) was the emotional trigger to the horrible events in boston

the bird gotta lotta people who still love him (while also recognizing the lifetime horror memories he's created for the victimized young lady), there is still a chance that the final chapter of this story hasn't been written yet

one of the bird's other teammates tole me yesterday that grant "the wolf of wall street" recently spoke to jabari who is living with his moms that his boston courtroom legal issues are expected to be resolved in the next couple of months & that he's still working out in pursuit of his nba hoop dreams
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8:53a, 12/22/22
my friend/fellow seatmate at road games in the 1st row behind the cal bench roberta martin & her bald azz husband who wanna keep me further afar recently moved from missouri to a gated community outside of orlando, both are enjoying time together & visiting both of their sons



one of the most emotional/thought provoking movies of all time (u got netflix?)#
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9:13a, 12/22/22
california golden bears quarterback update:

gilbert arizona boys kai & jack in the transfer portal, they gonna check out their potential options & the possibility of kai returning to berkeley should not be excluded

coach spav in conjunction with marshall is aggressively & proactively evaluating blue chip quarterback talent that is very interested in the cal football program with its arguably best in pac 12 elite skills playmakers in berkeley

my boy fernando mendoza from biscayne bay (where the cuban gentlemen sleep all day) is checking out las chicas con pelo negro at sexy fish on brickell avenue in south florida after midnite, his girlfriend camila cabello not happy with that **** but she never calls so that's on her

doesn't anybody stay in one place anymore?...this is all gonna get sorted out in the next 30 days, can we please be absolutely sure?



take off them rainbow shoes?#
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Shocky1
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9:34a, 12/22/22
former cal cornerback bounceback to east los angeles community college jaylen martin signed with utah state
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In reply to Shocky1 • 10:55a, 12/22/22
Shocky1 said:
Shocky1 said:
exclusive footage of shocky's failed attempt to storm folsom field:

shocky's 1st shocky's 1st substitute yoga teacher closing class namaste fail#
fun early evening victory while sitting on the floor with taylor & conversing with those that still love the magic of cal basketball & later a tasty perfectly prepared culinary experience with future son in law brenden glapion at fino in san francisco

my coaching efforts paid off handsomely, joel did a great job of attacking the rim with his blinding footspeed & "letting it fly" without any negative thoughts, my favorite canadian was totaled dialed in plus he got good hair

lars also played with freedom in response to the "demand the ball" & "impose your will" instructions tho he did seem puzzled by my constant yelling "lars, sprechen sie deutsch?"

taylor was very upset with the refs decision to call a defensive foul in the paint on freshman walk on jack mccloskey in the final half a minute, "he's trying so hard, it's mean to call a foul on him when he's obviously doing his best"

can't make this **** up

so all during the 2nd half the shockster relentlessly speaks with everybody on our end of the floor seats facing the opposing team's bench, literally everybody tole me they would join me in stormin' the floor if the bears won the game

as the final buzzer echoes the shockster sprints kinda marshawn jaunty bowlegged style to the center of his universe, mid court at haas pavillion, this is truly the palace

but guess what?

nobody followed him which taylor thought was pretty funny

anyways the security team surrounds me & mr head yellow jacket tells me in an apologetic voice that i got gotta my azz of the court

yeah the monster is zero for two this year in stormin' the field/court

the magic of cal basketball (should not involve bond $ for criminal felony trespassing/failure to stop)#

Shocky you are a good luck charm for Cal MBB. Having said that, please promise to not attend any more games this season. We need to ensure Mr Fox is walked to his car. Capeesh?
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Shocky1
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12:42p, 12/22/22

cluedo: what are the telltale traces of evidence that a cal portal transfer is leaving the door open for a return to berkeley and/or the staff might want them back as a viable scholly player?

if a player issues a social media message announcing their intent, they be gone for good never to be seen again

if there is no social media message aka jack & kai at this exact moment, it could still be the plumber with a football at memorial stadium but the odds are near zero that he's the killer

got it, elementary my dear watson
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Shocky1
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1:18p, 12/22/22
portal transfer rules: when a student athlete enters the portal, they relinquish their scholly at that moment, their previous school is under no obligation to provide a scholly if they decide later to return to that institution

decide wisely amigos#
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1:36p, 12/22/22

congrats to pwo edge defender 6'3" 245 lbs rj stephen from rich as **** atherton & sacred heart prep on his commitment to the cal football program, dude gotta motor

rj is not a dumb azz, he got a 3.77 gpa & also offers from the ivy league such as yale & dartmouth

tip of the hat to workaholic grad assistant coach hank schrider on getting this deal done

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (including the playgrounds of the rich & not so famous)
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1:51p, 12/22/22
joey calcaterra's dream school coming out of marin cathloic wuz the university of california, berkeley & being a part of cal's monster class which he regularly followed

but the monster got replaced by eric mcdonough & both jerry & jared goff and everybody lost interest in cal basketball...and the current staff did not successfully recruit him home to the bay

yesterday is still kinda leaking thru the roof as joey (who graduated from uc san diego, his back up choice) is leading #2 ranked uconn to epic victories on the biggest stages in collegiate basketball


under the shadow of mt tam (shocky hiking with blaze & a curvy brunette yoga female back on the back trail down to stinson beach back in the day)#
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Shocky1
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In reply to Shocky1 • 2:10p, 12/22/22
Shocky1 said:

anybody else think that matt bouza gotta couple curvy brunette yoga female daughters?

maybe matt could set up our head coach with one of them or something

shut up, shocky (ima tired of ur nosy azz ****)#
pro tip: always take an extra club on the par 3 island green particularly if the wind/breeze is a little up in ur face

https://instagr.am/p/rdG-nWHiYF
j gatsby could see when he gazed across the lake in the warm summertime evenings the distant forever receding blue light of cal's monster offensive line's future#
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2:18p, 12/22/22
as predicted here nevada offensive lineman grant starck commits to hometown oregon state over ucla
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DoubtfulBear
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In reply to Shocky1 • 2:23p, 12/22/22
OSU adds to an already stacked O line while we continue to collect DBs like we can just put them on offense
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3:11p, 12/22/22
doubtful, not saying ur wrong but have u palmed any azz today?
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Shocky1
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5:37p, 12/22/22
https://instagr.am/p/CgStXMGOwy-
what up segio?

got mad respect for u making ur first trip to the left coast & then adventuresome enuf to wanna try something new kinda like my yoga buddy jaylen brown while falling in the cali sun, yeah it's gonna be a vitamin d overdose

good luck with ur mind expanding pursuit of a berkeley sociology degree...and with ur 3 years of remaining eligibility looking forward to u competing for a starting inside linebacker job this spring next to the pac 12's top returning tackler jackson sirmon



the university of california, berkeley=#2 ranked university in the united states (and higher ranked than georgia tech)
https://www.forbes.com/top-colleges/

sergio is extra terrestrial extraordinary#
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Shocky1
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In reply to Shocky1 • 6:45p, 12/22/22
Shocky1 said:
Shocky1 said:
Shocky1 said:
Shocky1 said:

coach spav has made the decision to offer 6' 194 lbs university of louisiana monroe portal transfer quarterback chandler rogers who got 2 years of remaining eligibility

this season rogers had an impressive qb rating of 141.67 (against mediocre opponents) with an accurate 67.5% completion rate for 2403 yards with 15 touchdowns & 7 interceptions while also rushing for 607 yards, dude got wheels

will be interesting to see if chandler takes an official visit to berkeley this weekend...
chandler, ur gonna luv the palm trees at the claremont this weekend, palms are my favorite trees & the looming palm tree by the iconic short par 4 18th hole & the olympic club's clubhouse always makes me smile

https://instagr.am/p/ClofoVEO_8R
what's ur favorite tree?#
chandler, don't tell nobody but u were a 3 year honoree on the dean's list at mansfield high school back in the day, that's kinda important admissions information at the #1 ranked public university in the world

and ur really fast with quick bursts of acceleration which is kinda important given that cal's monster offensive line wuz not great last season in protecting the quarterback

not totally sure but kinda guessing they don't got palm tree breakfast burritos at the claremont this morning but who knows (never hurts to ask, rite)?

let's have an adventure, yeah it's sweater weather in cali


palm trees r beautiful#

monster crystal ball to cal
shocky still stands behind his monster crystal ball to cal

there are a couple of details that are getting worked on right now that involve admissions & housing, everything else is a green light

don't tell nobody but chandler really want cali palm tree art at his new place

and keep in mind that rogers got 2 years of remaining eligiblity vs plummer's 1 year of remaining eligilbity

cali palm trees r the official team tree of the california golden bears football program#

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6:55p, 12/22/22

fun cal's monster class $1,000,000 guess the number of palm trees contest:

the winner of this contest must submit the winning response accurately guessing the number of palm trees in this neighborhood video of sweater weather sometime prior to chandler rogers publicly committing to them california golden bears which will happen sometime before midnite new's year eve, got it?

contest rules: hare bear & other assorted high iq super sleuths are welcome to participate but keep in mind that the monster reserves the right to waive all rules & regulations at a moment's notice in a completely capricious & arbitrary manner with absolutely no justification...shocky reserves the rite to pay the contest winner in either cryptocurrency or monopoly money...curvy brunette yoga females are encouraged to enter this contest & will be given prejudicial preference in shopping at restoration hardware



let's have an adventure (in california with our toes in the sand with our gravity centered)#

cludeo: if u carefully look at the commissioned 5 palm tree family painting above that resides in the shockster's living room, u will notice that the tallest palm got blue & gold flecks in its base & the shortest one (taylor) got pink flecks
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In reply to rkt88edmo • 7:15p, 12/22/22
rkt88edmo said:
Econ141 said:



Damn - this must mean another portal qb coming in or that Kai was going to be the man next year ... Or Plummer saw that we couldn't get any immediate help on the OL so he is bailing. If the latter, I am worried about our other skill position players namey Ott and JMike.
Aaargh, hope it's the former and not the latter...

ROLL ON YOU (new) BEARS!!!

and don't forget to take the chicken out.
rkt, that doechii's job to take the chicken out (why don't u ask her to introduce herself?) but make no mistake about it chandler rogers is gonna be the quarterback of the future for them california golden bears
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7:33p, 12/22/22
california bears season open against north texas just gotta lotta more winnable with the mean greenie's starting quarterback 29 year old (only 1 year of remaining eligibility gunslinger (high risk/high reward moxy competitor) austin aune (former new york minor leaguer) in the portal
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rkt88edmo
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7:53p, 12/22/22
100 palm trees

and R-O-D Benson paints palm trees....just sayin'

And everybody needs cooking life skills, and not burning the house down (in a bad way) skills.
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8:09p, 12/22/22

chandler rogers living room artwork in berkeley#
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JB was a Chieftain
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8:20p, 12/22/22
There are 1959 palm trees. If I win I want floor seats to the new AD press conference
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Econ141
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In reply to Shocky1 • 8:43p, 12/22/22
Shocky1 said:
rkt88edmo said:
Econ141 said:



Damn - this must mean another portal qb coming in or that Kai was going to be the man next year ... Or Plummer saw that we couldn't get any immediate help on the OL so he is bailing. If the latter, I am worried about our other skill position players namey Ott and JMike.
Aaargh, hope it's the former and not the latter...

ROLL ON YOU (new) BEARS!!!

and don't forget to take the chicken out.
rkt, that doechii's job to take the chicken out (why don't u ask her to introduce herself?) but make no mistake about it chandler rogers is gonna be the quarterback of the future for them california golden bears


Interesting - any idea what the connection between Rogers and Spav is? And shouldn't be be giving the more heralded Kai Miller a closer look?
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9:51p, 12/22/22
econ, my take (which could change in 5 minutes from now) on the quarterback situation based on conversations with multiple people within & close to the cal football program is that chandler rogers is the quarterback of the future & that he will commit before new year's eve, that kai milner will return from the portal & pursue his berkeley degree with an emphasis upon biz classes while competing in coach spav's quarterback room and that jack plummer is gone for good

coach spav in concert with coach wilcox want to move forward with college football's trend towards mobile quarterbacks particularly in light of the challenges that cal's monster offensive line faced this season which resulted in the tough as **** plummer nearly getting sent to the el monte spinal & taquitito institute on almost a weekly basis due to brutal punishing hits...whatever happens moving forward jack will always have the monster's respect for his courageous bravery in accepting the 2022 season physical punishment

but look at the pac 12's top quarterbacks in 2022, what do they all have in common?...they are all +1 athletes that can flat out run...we're talking about williams at usc, dtr at ucla, penix at washington, ward at washington state, etc.

chandler rogers last season on a 4-8 team threw for 2403 yards, 15 touchdowns with 7 interceptions & a remarkable 67.5% completion percentage...according to pff his wide receivers dropped 10% of his passes so his adjusted completion rate is pushing almost 80% and that's absolutely exactly what we need in berkeley with jmike, jeremiah, mavin, starling & hopefully nyziah in the future

it's also very important to note that he played well despite a near lack of any support against both texas & alabama, he's got the poise to lead the bears against auburn next september in a hopefully sold out memorial stadium that will be ready to storm the field

the x factor is that chandler rogers can run with the ball, he ran for 353 yards last season...can you imagine a speedy quarterback on the field when opposing defenses already gotta account for the coach spav 2 running back sets at times with both jaydn ott & byron cardwell as be gone threats every time they touch the ball?

another factor is that chandler got 2 years of remaining eligibility which means that we got an opportunity to generate some offensive fireworks for both the 2023 & 2024 seasons in berkeley

chandler rogers is the quarterback of the future in berkeley#

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Shocky1
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10:17p, 12/22/22

100%#
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