cal's monster offensive line

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Shocky1
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8:39p, 10/23/23


fun monster homework assignment for the 3.7 gpa brent & 3.5 gpa wade

u both want ur moms & dad to share in ur collegiate gamedays, right?

so calculate all the costs for cal & iowa state's next home games, ok?

cal plays usc this saturday at 1:00 pm at memorial stadium in berkeley...ur parents can wake up & catch the 1st flight from corona to oakland on southwest, then take bart to berkeley & then fly home that evening...no costly hotels or rental vehicles...and yeah the flight is 1 hour each way

iowa state gamedays are gonna require expensive all day flights on friday from lax with connecting flights to iowa, then a car rental to drive to ames, checking into a hotel for friday & saturday nites and finally flying home for 10 hours if there are weather delays on sunday

do u luv ur parents or wut?

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Shocky1
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9:10p, 10/23/23

this is the nfl (yawn)#
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10:20p, 10/23/23


Advance copy of tomorrow's front page for the LA Times:

USC senior administration is working around the clock to ensure that all USC dance & cheer members that attended this weekend's "mentorship" blowout at the Beverly Hills Hotel's Polo Lounge that spilled into the adjacent casitas during the after hours "meet & greet" party will receive preferential infectious STD check ups at Keck Hospital on a priority basis.

This "voluntary" event was jointly sponsored by the Men of Troy, the Jonathan Club of Los Angeles & SugarDaddy.com.

Petros Papadakis, Lincoln Riley, Pete Carroll, Al Cowlings and Traveler could not be reached for comment at the time of press. It is believed that Gloria Allred has already set up shop at Keck Hospital.

USC President Carol L Folt commented on the way to her car this evening, "We are Trojans for life!"

this is usc medicine#

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Shocky1
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10:57p, 10/23/23

shame the guy on the far left can't afford dry cleaning (wrinkly as ****)#
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sonofabear51
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In reply to Shocky1 • 10:59p, 10/23/23
$c sucks. Many ways.
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4:33a, 10/24/23

this is usc football (rip nicole brown & ron goldman)#
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5:27a, 10/24/23

cal's new special teams coach breaks down kickoff coverage for the 2023 season

real talk#
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82gradDLSdad
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In reply to Shocky1 • 6:07a, 10/24/23
Shocky1 said:

this is usc football (rip nicole brown & ron goldman)#


Imagine having so much evidence against you that you go through the rest of your life with everyone, even probably your closest friends, thinking you are a murderer and should be in jail. Of course, maybe OJ is on the Trump narcissist level, then he's oblivious.
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In reply to Shocky1 • 8:29a, 10/24/23
Shocky1 said:


this saturday morning shocky went to courtney's fun outfield yoga event (she wuz truly in her element) at the salt river fields (spring training home of the dbacks or something)
https://www.instagram.com/stories/highlights/17898123008810124/

the following is a loose transcript of my sorta telepathic conversation afterwards at the tree fort with my doggys when i walked into the kitchen with my golden bear blue yoga mat & sandals with major grass clippings on the way to dropping them in the pool for a little cleaning

benji (see foto above, he's 100% like his human shocky, both annoying as **** & loveable): hey, slow down there big guy, what's up with the grass clippings?...did you go on a lucky leash hike without us?...did you get lost?

shocky: benji, this morning's yoga class wuz for humans, not doggys, sorry

benji (sniffing everything like a maniac): what, i don't believe you...who would not wanna include me?...plus this grass is very suspicious with its high fertilizer content and no doggy pee smells, is this grass from uranus or something?

beauty (benji's tiny black furball sister, just rescued/adopted her, couldn't split them up forever): relax benji, daddy can take us for a walk now before his bears game

misty mae (an oldy but goody): hey, stella & mugsy (the cats) ate part of my breakfast!

shocky: ay caramba, where's the lucky leashes?

who saved who?#


conversation with the doggys after our morning mountain hike a couple of minutes ago, a successful venture with no cacti in our paws

benji: hey big guy, how come i'm not invited to noon yoga, what about me?

shocky: benji, what would you even do at class?

benji: well, for starters i would warmly greet everyone & make sure they had plenty of water in their dishes

beauty: benji, be nice to daddy, we can do yoga in the backyard while he's gone, ok?

benji: beauty, that's not the same thing!

misty mae: hey, when you guys are done talking about this stupid yoga can we get some breakfast served around here?

shocky: look, benji, yoga classes are for humans but i'll tell you what, next time we do an afternoon nap you can be the sofa king & get first choice on the cloud

benji (leaping up in excitement): yes!!!

stella & mugsy (licking their paws & shaking their heads from their perches on the kitchen counter)



doggy drama with scrappy doo#
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DiabloWags
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In reply to Shocky1 • 9:11a, 10/24/23
Shocky1 said:

cal's new special teams coach breaks down kickoff coverage for the 2023 season

real talk#

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Classic!
"Cults don't end well. They really don't."
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SBGold
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In reply to DiabloWags • 11:47a, 10/24/23
DiabloWags said:
Shocky1 said:

cal's new special teams coach breaks down kickoff coverage for the 2023 season

real talk#

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Classic!
Basically Cal football for the last 15 years
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Big C
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In reply to Shocky1 • 12:49p, 10/24/23
Shocky1 said:

cal's new special teams coach breaks down kickoff coverage for the 2023 season

real talk#

Let's not do a "reverse Ted Lasso" and hire that guy, because before long, people will be complaining that he throws his players under the bus.
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4:53p, 10/24/23

the final truck stop town roadtrip (can't wait for the east coastie acc in 2024)#
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5:53p, 10/24/23


benji just asked me wut time is the rehearsal dinner in so cal this friday nite & if he should wear blue & gold on saturday to give the bears good luck in the oppenheimer game?

ruh roh (sshhhh...doggy sitter coming over to the tree fort tomorrow morning)#
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Shocky1
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In reply to Shocky1 • 7:05p, 10/24/23
Shocky1 said:


Advance copy of tomorrow's front page for the LA Times:

USC senior administration is working around the clock to ensure that all USC dance & cheer members that attended this weekend's "mentorship" blowout at the Beverly Hills Hotel's Polo Lounge that spilled into the adjacent casitas during the after hours "meet & greet" party will receive preferential infectious STD check ups at Keck Hospital on a priority basis.

This "voluntary" event was jointly sponsored by the Men of Troy, the Jonathan Club of Los Angeles & SugarDaddy.com.

Petros Papadakis, Lincoln Riley, Pete Carroll, Al Cowlings and Traveler could not be reached for comment at the time of press. It is believed that Gloria Allred has already set up shop at Keck Hospital.

USC President Carol L Folt commented on the way to her car this evening, "We are Trojans for life!"

this is usc medicine#


connecting the dots#
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7:12p, 10/24/23

fight on (in south central)#
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8:30p, 10/24/23
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9:30p, 10/24/23
https://instagr.am/p/CuxKIOEIazx
2023 golf magazine world top 100 list:

as someone who has played all the world top 100 lists since 1997, very interested in receiving today an advance release of the 2023 rankings (ranked every 2 years) which will be publicly released in december
https://top100golf.blogspot.com/2006/01/people-who-have-played-top-100-golf.html

fun fact: my former caddie home course san francisco golf club is #38, the cal club is #45 while the olympic lake (#96 in the 2021 rankings) drops out of the world top 100, the just completed gil hanse renovation will hopefully add some fun & more strategic options to the design along with eliminating the weird walk to the 8th tee box from the 7th green...also looking forward to playing coore & crenshaw's brambles when it formally opens in 2024, yeah it's just up the hill from the future t-rex yoga studio in yountville

there are 8 new additions to the 2023 rankings:

#68 the lido (not played)...tom doak's replica based upon historical documents in wisconsin of the charles blair mcdonald no longer in existence masterpiece on long island...slim wadie & shocky will be visiting the sand valley resort next june


#76 point hardy (not played)...coore & crensahw design on the clifftops in st lucia


#85 te arai south (not played)...coore & crenshaw design in the sand dunes north of auckland...slim wadie (who has never been to nz) & shocky gotta a february g2c2 (global golf centurion club) new zealand trip which will also include tara iti (ranked#20), tom doak's te arai (north) course & another trip to my favorite resort in the world cape kidnappers


#88 lofoten links (played)...in northern norway (home of the spectacular northern lights in the winter) shocky played a round in the morning, went with my kids to the beach all afternoon, took an evening sofa king nap & then played a round teeing off at the stroke of midnight


#95 shanqin bay (played)...this coore & crenshaw gem on the cliffs of hainan island in china is my favorite course in asia, there's nothing even remotely close in terms of greatness


#96 victoria (played)...very cool mackenzie design in melbourne's sand belt region, this clever australian course with spectacular bunkering starts with a downhill drivable par 4 with a million potential strategies


#97 machrihanish (played)...on a remote scottish isle sits arguably the greatest starting 1st hole in golf


#100 royal cinque ports (played)...the low key kinda scruffy english club got wild azz greens with tumultuous undulations


so right now schulzie is a 97 with 3 to go to complete the latest quest



what's your life adventure (and whose gonna accompany you on your journey)?#

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (and there's a lotta world to see)
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Shocky1
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7:25a, 10/25/23


^ if u look carefully at the 8 fotos above with 2 eyes u will notice that there are a multitude of cool walking paths but zero cartpaths & that's because the magic of golf is best experienced afoot just like the best doggy hikes up the mountain (just ask benji who got the lucky leashes from his forever home tree fort in his jaws rite now, he's ready to roll baby, paws up, let's ******* go)

and if u been reading the last zillion monster posts u will know if ur heart that the coach bloesch trench workers on cal's monster offensive line r gonna be mentally & physically prepared to play with 100% effort this saturday at memorial stadium in the oppenheimer game which is gonna be the final time that cal & usc meet in a football game in our lifetimes

do u got ur tix(s) for potentially the most bitter game ever at memorial stadium?

this **** is getting live (we all get only 1 life on planet earth)#
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Shocky1
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10:41a, 10/25/23

cal's monster offensive line recruiting update:

coach bloesch has extended an offer to 6'5" 315 lbs keyshawn blackstock an offensive tackle from michigan state who played 74 snaps in the spartans first 4 games before entering the transfer portal yesterday morning

keyshawn wuz a junior college all american at coffeyville community college, he's a grad of newton high school in covington, georgia

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world
https://www.forbes.com/top-colleges/
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Big C
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In reply to Shocky1 • 4:30p, 10/25/23
Shocky1 said:

104 is a high number! Maybe that's what Riley meant.
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89Bear
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4:55p, 10/25/23
Beautiful photos Shocky. Another gorgeous one would be the fans streaming onto the turf this Saturday!!!
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Shocky1
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10:24p, 10/25/23
89, 100% amigo

the magic of cal football (involves stormin' the field at memorial stadium, breathing in & out)#
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Shocky1
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11:06p, 10/25/23

the changing landscape of cal football recruiting:

5 of the 13 current 2024 high school commitments are from texas, friday nite lights is a real thing in a region that cares passionately about football...the reality is that there are a lotta high gpa elite student athletes in the great state of texas that are kinda tired of the nasty azz humid summers & freezing azz winters that wanna experience something new in cali at the #1 ranked public university in the world

and that's why the future acc rivalry with smu starting in 2024 is such a big deal & why future out of conference games need to target opponents such as this year's fun roadtrip against north texas in denton

yeah it's ur grandfather's cal football team that wuz primarily from so cal

the university of calveston (is coached by the kings of the hill)#
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Shocky1
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11:54p, 10/25/23

cal football bay area recruiting:

casual uninformed fans will tell u that the bears r striking out in keeping local talent at home, they are often ignorant about the gpas of many prospects

that's not even close to the truth

the current pac 12 leading tackler kaleb elarms-orr is from hayward, he is an elite +1 athlete

the most talented young tight end in the western states is jack endries from danville

the most explosive freshman running back on the west coast is javian "the jet" thomas from oakland

starting cornerback lu magia hearns is from pittsburg

can the staff do a better job with enticing bay area talent to stay home?

absolutely yes, moms & the fam luv the short drive to berkeley on fall gamedays

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (including the treasure island musical fest & caldecott tunnel high school)
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82gradDLSdad
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In reply to Shocky1 • 5:09a, 10/26/23
Shocky1 said:

the changing landscape of cal football recruiting:

5 of the 13 current 2024 high school commitments are from texas, friday nite lights is a real thing in a region that cares passionately about football...the reality is that there are a lotta high gpa elite student athletes in the great state of texas that are kinda tired of the nasty azz humid summers & freezing azz winters that wanna experience something new in cali at the #1 ranked public university in the world

and that's why the future acc rivalry with smu starting in 2024 is such a big deal & why future out of conference games need to target opponents such as this year's fun roadtrip against north texas in denton

yeah it's ur grandfather's cal football team that wuz primarily from so cal

the university of calveston (is coached by the kings of the hill)#


To further show his frustrations with the Cowboys he ate another dozen donuts. That'll show 'em.
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Shocky1
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In reply to Shocky1 • 5:54a, 10/26/23
Shocky1 said:
Shocky1 said:
the following is a reprint from cal's monster class back in the day:

visited this morning the recently opened nicklaus design group ferry point golf course just outside of nyc with panoramic views of the manhattan skyline

https://instagr.am/p/CtR6QY5uwFE
arrive from my hotel by cab at the clubhouse around 7:30 am to stretch & warm up at the practice facility

upon arrival the head golf professional tells me that ferry point's developer donald trump heard that as a golf digest & golf magazine rankings panelist that i had an 8:10 tee time and would i like to play with the donald at 8:20 am instead?

so i say sure, no big deal, let's do this

so we make the introductions on the practice green & the 1st thing i notice is that trump has the weirdest color hair ever (kinda yellow orange) & that he has total man boobs along with an oversized obnoxious red cap

i walk & carry my lightweight leather mackzenie bag while the donald drives a golf cart literally to within 6 inches of every green...just as annoyingly, we then proceed to play thru every group on the golf course in front of us (why does he do this, why not just take the 1st tee time?)...it's funny to watch people's reactions as he dictates the playing thru, some golfers are understandably agitated while others want a selfie with him on their phones, he very clearly enjoys all the drama he's created

so he tells us while we wait for the short par 4 8th green to clear that he thinks ferry point is one of the greatest golf courses in the united states (it isn't, there are at least a dozen courses on long island & the hamptons that are significantly better) & that he's qualified to make that statement because of his extensive travels around the globe playing golf, that nobody knows golf architecture better than him & that includes actual golf architects

so in front of his 2 buddies & his cart caddie i tell the donald that actually i'm one of the 13 guys (and the youngest) to have played the world top 100 courses & stare him down...total silence, one of his buddies who is the chairman of macys starts to laugh & donald play punches my shoulder kinda hard, he's been pwned...whatever

dude is an interesting guy but playing golf with him is not really a celebration of the game but more like riding a roller coaster



you're fired, shocky#
liv & pga updates:

1) the proposed but not finalized 2024 14 tournament liv exhibition golf tour for american traitors that have turned their backs on 9/11 will not return to any of the trump owned/managed golf courses that have dominated the liv schedule

2) the official golf world rankings announced this week that the liv exhibition tournaments will NOT receive any world golf rankings points...this means that very few liv golfers will qualify for the majors in the future...this is fantastic good news

3) the shriners pga tournament at tpc summerlin in las vegas this week will not include colin morikawa (who just built a home nearby outside of the summit club in vegas, colin will be playing in the zozo pga tournament in japan next week), max homa (vegas is only a 45 minute flite from arizona) or byeong hun an (currently suspended, see above post)...michael kim & james hahn will rep the bears this week on the pga tour
4) liv golfers inability to earn official golf world rankings points will damage their opportunities to qualify for the 2024 summer game olympics outside of paris at le golf national

max & colllin got dreams that r not for sale (only losers like grifter steve lapper wanna monetize everything for a sleazy azz buck to pay bills)#
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Shocky1
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6:15a, 10/26/23


look 82, sharing a chocolate glazed donut with fuchsia sprinkles from levain bakery while walking from the west village to the south central park equinox every now & then is not a bad idea but a daily 32 oz green juice is always the pro move for those on a quest to become a substitute yoga teacher at modern yoga (or a male azz stripper), ok?



sometimes a new perspective of things can be illuminating (even if u fall)#
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82gradDLSdad
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In reply to Shocky1 • 6:31a, 10/26/23
Shocky1 said:


look 82, sharing a chocolate glazed donut with fuchsia sprinkles from levain bakery while walking from the west village to the south central park equinox every now & then is not a bad idea but a daily 32 oz green juice is always the pro move for those on a quest to become a substitute yoga teacher at modern yoga (or a male azz stripper), ok?



sometimes a new perspective of things can be illuminating (even if u fall)#


No wonder you're thin...sharing one donut???? I don't even share my massive apple fritter.
Two things:
I actually get one plain buttermilk per week at Chick's in Concord with my coffee buddies.
Back when I could work all day outside building a deck or something, one apple fritter would power me all day. It was incredible. Kept waiting for the sugar, fat, carb crash that never came.
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Shocky1
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6:33a, 10/26/23
^^ let's be very clear on this, donuts r one of the 5 recognized basic food groups & considered a superfood by some non certified chefs/nutritionists or something

https://www.lemon8-app.com/wanderingroutes/7285496635785724421?region=us

https://instagr.am/p/Cyq_fDEMC4u
don't be a dumb azz (better to palm a tight azz)#
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harebear
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8:56a, 10/26/23
Shocky, I hope you don't golf Sedona on the regular! #teamjavelina




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10:07a, 10/26/23


don't tell spav or nobody but luv nando's comments that he's gonna audible pitchouts (and fake pitch outs) to jaydn ott in open space & also attack the middle 3rd of the football field in the vertical downfield passing game...fernando es muy intelligente con shocky


mi amigo de biscayne bay (where the cuban gentlemen sleep all day)#
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10:17a, 10/26/23
https://instagr.am/p/Cv7lOmCNfu1
hare, my favorite activity in sedona got nothing to do with with golf or javelinas, it's sunday brunch at cess at l'auberge de sedona after a doggy hike along the creekside trails with ethereal views of the red rocks

that video (would encourage everybody to never get that close to a wild creature moms with their offspring) is cute but not respectful to a potentially feeling threatened moms keeping her loved one in a safe zone (and that's something u know all about protecting the most vulnerable from trauma/the real world)

3 plate brunch minimum (burp)#
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5:06p, 10/26/23
https://instagr.am/p/CEfiZimjtQ_
nobu golf & teppanyaki club>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>augusta national par 3 course



coolest par 3s in cali#
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7:55p, 10/26/23

multiple nba scouts have shared with me that the bears #1 ranked nba prospect is jaylon tyson so it's a shame that cal's athletic director is an impotent bureaucrat that don't got any relationships with anybody at the ncca or anyone with influence with their basketball eligibility compliance staff

vote no on the con artist (the andrew mcgraw for athletic director movement continues to gain momentum)#
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