cal's monster offensive line

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9:34p, 5/26/24

california golden bears yucky blucky fruitcake classes (mr spieker not amused cuz he got worser seats):

doechii, why don't you introduce the yucky blucky fruitcakes to the class?

2025 class:

anthony league, running back (3.9 gpa)
ikechukwu okafor, edge defender (3.7 gpa)
ben howard, offensive guard (3.2 gpa)
meyer swinney, hybrid wide receiver/tight end (3.75 gpa)
carter jones, inside linebacker (3.8 gpa)
kaden cook, cornerback (3.4 gpa)
jojo solis, running back (3.14 gpa)

2024 class:

will mcdonald, left guard (3.5 gpa)
checkhsaliou fall, edge defender (3.3 gpa)
cj harris, quarterback (3.5 gpa)
serigne tounkara, edge defender (3.88 gpa)
kyion graves, wide receiver (3.3 gpa)
ryan yaites, safety (3.2 gpa)
jasiah wagoner, corner/nickel back (3.25 gpa)
tj bollers, edge defender (4.0 gpa)
corey dyches, hybrid tight end/wide receiver (3.1 gpa)
braden miller, offensive tackle (4.0 gpa)
liam johnson, inside linebacker (3.36 gpa at princeton)
khamani hudson, cornerback (3.5 gpa)
bobby engstler, punter/kicker (3.72 gpa)
jonathan "gameday" brady, wide receiver (3.2 gpa)
mikey miller, wide receiver (3.8 gpa)
victor stoffel, offensive tackle (motivated student in sweden)
kadarius calloway, running back (3.0+ gpa)
ryan coe, kicker (3.5 gpa)
tobias merriweather, wide receiver (3.6 gpa)
ja'ir smith, defensive back (3.0+ gpa)
syris corley, offensive lineman (3.0 gpa)
rush reimer, offensive lineman (3.3 gpa)
marcus harris, defensive back (3.2 gpa)
aidan ikaika keanaaina, defensive tackle (4.0 gpa)
aiden newbill, offensive line (3.72 gpa)
isaiah crosby, safety (3.0+ gpa)
luke ferrelli, inside linebacker (4.0 gpa)
chandler rogers, quarterback (3.3 gpa)
teddye buchanan, inside linebacker (3.5 gpa)
josiah martin, wide receiver (3.5 gpa)
jack endries, tight end (3.83 gpa)
trond grizzell, wide receiver (3.8 gpa)
bj canady, defensive tackle (3.91 gpa)
legend journey, apex predator edge defender (3.3 gpa)
ej caminong, quarterback (3.5 gpa)
dayton "dayday" aupiu, defensive back (3.51 gpa)
jamaal wiley, running back (3.0+ gpa)
trevor rogers, wide receiver (3.5 gpa)
michael-anthony okwura, defensive lineman (3.4 gpa)
eze osondu, inside linebacker (3.5 gpa)
brookyln cheek, defensive back (3.0+ gpa)
camden jones, tight end (3.0+ gpa)
tyler knape, offensive line (3.8 gpa)

2023 class:
barrett miller, offensive lineman (4.2 hs gpa & stanford mechancial engineering degree)
taj davis, wide receiver (3.2 gpa)
king doerue, running back (3.5 gpa)
isaiah ifanse, running back (3.2 gpa at montana state)
marcus scott ii, cornerback (3.3 gpa at missouri)
tidiane "frenchy" jalloh (motivated student from france)
matthew wykoff, offensive tackle (3.75 gpa)
marquez "mojo" dortch, wide receiver (2.9 gpa)
ben finley, quarterback (4.308 gpa)
patrick mcmorris, safety (3.65 gpa)
david bird, longsnapper (4.0 gpa)
marquis montgomery, wide receiver (3.4 gpa)
martin tine, offensive tackle (2.9 gpa)
stanley mckenzie, nose tackle (3.3 gpa)
david reese, outside linebacker (3.7 gpa)
sam jackson v, quarterback (2.8 gpa)
brian hightower, wide receiver (3.2 gpa)
justin williams-thomas aka j-will, running back (4.0 gpa)
asher alberding, tight end (3.85 gpa)
jt byrne, tight end (3.75 gpa)
lachlan wilson, punter (strong student from australia)
byron caldwell, running back (3.3 gpa)
sergio allen, inside linebacker (3.4 gpa)
matt littlejohn, defensive back (3.0+ gpa)
javian "the jet" thomas, running back (3.4 gpa)
nohl williams, defensive back (3.61 gpa)
kaylin moore, defensive back (3.4 gpa)
frederick williams iii, offensive line (3.6 gpa)
zurich ashford, defensive end (3.62 gpa)
ben marshall, tight end (3.4 gpa)
ryan mcculloch, outside linebacker (4.1 gpa)
tiumalu afalava, defensive line (4.1 gpa)
cade uluave, inside linebacker (3.8 gpa)
sailasa vadrawale, defensive back (3.46 gpa)
nyziah hunter, wide receiver (3.0+ gpa)
nick morrow, offensive tackle (3.7 gpa)
michael luckhurst, kicker (4.37 gpa)



wow, that was quite the introduction, doechii, we're gonna have to talk after class...don't forget to take the chicken out

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (a degree is kinda like a winning LOTTERY TIX for those who wanna build GENERATIONAL WEALTH thru academic hard work)

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10:11p, 5/26/24
https://instagr.am/p/C7ZrujSvD_V
some berkeley grads r crazy as **** & bad drivers (reality is overrated, doms need a legoland driving school license or something)#
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10:25a, 5/27/24
https://instagr.am/p/BxSgywLBG5x


portrait of an an artist as a doggy dog (this is wut shocky sees in the mirrah except for green eyes, protecting the most vulnerable in society)#
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In reply to Shocky1 • 10:30a, 5/27/24
Shocky1 said:
https://instagr.am/p/CKuDqtxA42X
2024 memorial day (with appreciation for those that daily risk their lives in service)#
https://instagr.am/p/CLmmTgYAWf0


a california golden bear thank you to all those that protect us from harm's way#
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wifeisafurd
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In reply to Shocky1 • 11:30a, 5/27/24
Shocky1 said:
utah update:

in speaking with a utah mega whale donor (not the huntsman family) that's hosted me multiple times at the fabulous shooting star golf club in teton village wyoming, utah is academically aspirational & never wanted to be associated with big 12 truck stop skools

this got very little to do with money or even byu, this is about the utes quest to become a world class university (u can't do that being affiliated/playing in the same conference as arizona & oklahoma state), the university has invested a gazillion dollars in becoming a more respected research university & targeting top teaching talent

utah wants to rub shoulders with cal, stanford, duke, notre dame, georgia tech, virginia, north carolina, etc. not baylor, iowa state & texas tech

this is something that dumb azzs like greg flugaur (who basically makes **** up) & karen brodkin (berkeley grad/big 12 lobbyist aka "acc prisoner") will never understand

the big 12 is for losers (who will be handing out towels/moving boxes at age 30)#

Okay, I agree they never wanted to be in the Big 12. They do have major aspirations of the academic side. They wanted to be in the B1G and were told to wait (the were not told no like Cal), the next choice was the ACC, but FSU and Clemson balked (this was before FSU didn't make the playoffs and now wants to be in a tougher conference), and if your guy really is a big booster, he would have told you they hate being in the same conference as BYU bedsides the other deplorables.

But how does work for Utah at this stage? Listen, I know the AD, and the timing sucks. They signed a GOR which actually allows them to leave - fine. But their schedules are set for the next several years, and the one thing about the ACC is that lack of stability. This is not a move Utah can make without knowing the status of FSU and Clemson, and if the ACC is going to explode. Also, there AD and school President just publicly denied any interest in moving to the ACC. The move that makes sense is if the ACC explodes, and Utah tries to take Cal and Furd with them to set-up a west coast pod in the B1G. The one thing Utah brings is a strong football program with good TV ratings and for the 4 west coast teams in the B1G geographical proximity, Cal and Furd would bring desired academics that the B1G wants, not to mention allowing a better geographical pod for the existing 4 former Pac teams in the B1G. (Also, I think all 3 teams would be willing to take a haircut on tv revenue for a period). Right now, Fox/ESPN has plenty of content. That is not the case if the ACC blows-up. Utah Cal and Furd start having better media value.
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12:21p, 5/27/24
wifey, you make a lotta good points but my post wuz merely to share the mindset of utah prez randall as explained to me by one of his mega whale donors who gotta close relationship with him...prez randall's goal is for the university of utah to become a top 10 public university in the united states

the analysis of roadblocks (schedules, revenues, the future of conferences) is kinda irrelevant to taylor in his relentless quest for utah to become respected as a top 10 public university in the united states

there's a much better chance of this happening in the academically elite acc than the garbage time academic truck stop big 12, the issues being discussed on this board from prez randall's perspective are details for his athletic director & staff to figure out and not particularly germane to his aspirational academic goals for the university

the utes gotta smart athletic director that innovatively sell tixs in a city with a nba franchise, a strong athletic department financial statement with only 18 programs & aren't borrowing multiples of ten million from the central campus every year (with zero chance of future revenues for paying off the looming debt) like general james knowlton who is steering cal athletics directly towards a financial tsunami

go utes#

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In reply to Shocky1 • 12:24p, 5/27/24
Shocky1 said:
Shocky1 said:

2025 6' 170 lbs safety aiden manutai from kahuku high school in waipahu (the northern shore of pearl harbor where hawaii route 90 & interstate h-1 intersect) is gonna official trip to berkeley may 23rd-26th

check out aiden's physical style of play & outta nowhere SPEED in closing on passes


manutai would 100% be in a position to compete for a starting job very early in berkeley kinda the same way sioape vatikani started as a true freshman as predicted by the monster prior to his summertime arrival


aiden is not a dumb azz, he got a 4.0 gpa

we gotta bring more of that hawaiian truck food culture to the bay...in benji & winterhawk we trust to tell the story re: a world class education that is relatively close to the hawaiian islands that offers nfl development/early playing time at memorial stadium in the acc in the wonderfully diverse san francisco bay area

https://instagr.am/p/BoayiSHggWh
the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world
https://www.forbes.com/top-colleges/
https://instagr.am/p/C41-VQMOu5D
welcome 4.0 gpa elite safety aiden manutai to the claremont this weekend on his official visit to the #1 ranked public university in the world, he already know the importance of a curvy brunette yoga female girlfriend, hope u know too


july 12th announcement/commitment date#
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Shocky1
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In reply to Shocky1 • 1:20p, 5/27/24
Shocky1 said:
Shocky1 said:

2025 6'1" 205 lbs outside linebacker ke'breion winston from lancaster high school (south of dallas) is gonna officially visit cal on may 23rd-26th

the 5a all state linebacker as a junior got +1 athleticism & closes on the ball with lightning SPEED like his hair is on fire or something


coach wilcox texted me today to let me know that it's "highly likely" that cal's 2025 spring ball is gonna be held at the university of calveston's practice facility in terrell off the i-20 (next to the buc-ee's ) to make sure ke'breion & all our growing # of texas guys can still see their families in addition to the 2024 smu game in highland park this november after thanksgiving

https://instagr.am/p/C4tLMyfJfHH
the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (for those that wanna build generational wealth thru football development competing in the atlantic athletic conference & hard work in the classrooms of berkeley)
https://www.forbes.com/top-colleges/

welcome high priority targeted prospect ke'breion winston on his official visit to the university of calveston

BEST hs hype video evah#

the university of calveston (where's buc-ee?)#
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3:55p, 5/27/24
https://instagr.am/p/C7fB7jhpzOH
https://instagr.am/p/C7elSZnP2yL
HEAT WARNING: it's gonna be hot as hell this september is both auburn & tallahassee, r u maximizing ur work in player led practice/workouts right now to ensure ur 100% ready to roll (with no snaps off, sioape) with a relentless non stop motor???

r u gonna find urself in a **** situation cuz u made a dumb decision???



blaming external factors such as the ncca or weather for ur own failures is for losers (own ur outcomes in life)#

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4:46p, 5/27/24

just say no to academic truck stop skools (don't be a dumb azz)#
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In reply to Shocky1 • 5:21p, 5/27/24
Shocky1 said:
Shocky1 said:

2025 6'3" 290 lbs defensive tackle all american from powerhouse guyer high school in denton texas

the university of calveston (is a real thing, just ask ryan yaites, josiah martin & megan thee stallion)#

https://instagr.am/p/C7KuJR4xNfF
the university of calveston (gonna play spring ball in denton in 2025)#

denton is bear territory#
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Pittstop
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In reply to Shocky1 • 5:46p, 5/27/24
Shocky1 said:
Shocky1 said:
Shocky1 said:

2025 6'3" 290 lbs defensive tackle all american from powerhouse guyer high school in denton texas

the university of calveston (is a real thing, just ask ryan yaites, josiah martin & megan thee stallion)#

https://instagr.am/p/C7KuJR4xNfF
the university of calveston (gonna play spring ball in denton in 2025)#

denton is bear territory#


So he has a "top 9", and Cal got one of only "5" allowable OVs? Hmm.
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Shocky1
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6:00p, 5/27/24

https://instagr.am/p/C6qxM-Ru8Gw
kd is NOT a dumb azz (he don't play video games & luvs doggy dogs)#
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6:01p, 5/27/24
^^ pitts, xavier is an elite national prospect, it's possible he would start from day 1 in berkeley
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11:47p, 5/27/24


a valuable recruiting differentiator (cal's monster class)#
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mbBear
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In reply to Shocky1 • 9:28a, 5/28/24
Shocky1 said:


a valuable recruiting differentiator (cal's monster class)#
What does "cultural capital" mean, and, if I was talking to a potential Cal student, what does it mean to him or her in choosing Cal over their other choices?
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11:58a, 5/28/24
https://instagr.am/p/C5rQ0X4S9Uv
mb, that's kinda the beauty of cultural capital, it probably means different things to different people, right?

and isn't that sorta the unofficial mission statement of the university of california, berkeley which continues its legacy as a major epicenter of the civll rights & freedom of speech movement in the united states?...a disruptor of the status quo & a celebration of out of the box innovation?

https://instagr.am/p/C2IjJsSyXb3
for me cultural capital is the amalgamation of people from all over planet earth coming together in berkeley & hopefully sharing our different values in a mostly respectful & thoughtful manner with one another...coming from monochromatic white azz stinson beach high school berkeley wuz a life changing event/experience for shocky (and no not just talking about 1:37 am very flexible sex against a wall with a curvy brunette yoga female in the evans diamond visitor dugout)


but let's be real here, cultural capital can also mean the ******* beatdown we're gonna deliver to them disloyal florida state rednecks in tallahassee this fall in the annual oppenheimer game, science is not gonna be able to save the seminoles



KABOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

berkeley is changing the world (and that includes ******* up fsu on saturday september 21st)#
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wifeisafurd
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In reply to Shocky1 • 12:11p, 5/28/24
Shocky1 said:
wifey, you make a lotta good points but my post wuz merely to share the mindset of utah prez randall as explained to me by one of his mega whale donors who gotta close relationship with him...prez randall's goal is for the university of utah to become a top 10 public university in the united states

the analysis of roadblocks (schedules, revenues, the future of conferences) is kinda irrelevant to taylor in his relentless quest for utah to become respected as a top 10 public university in the united states

there's a much better chance of this happening in the academically elite acc than the garbage time academic truck stop big 12, the issues being discussed on this board from prez randall's perspective are details for his athletic director & staff to figure out and not particularly germane to his aspirational academic goals for the university

the utes gotta smart athletic director that innovatively sell tixs in a city with a nba franchise, a strong athletic department financial statement with only 18 programs & aren't borrowing multiples of ten million from the central campus every year (with zero chance of future revenues for paying off the looming debt) like general james knowlton who is steering cal athletics directly towards a financial tsunami

go utes#

While sports are nice for academics to discuss around the water cooler, it just isn't the difference maker academically. No one really cares about sport teams at Cal Tech or MIT, Ivy schools, etc. Any move by Utah to the ACC would be for protection of athletic revenues because and the perceived value of the member schools in moving the Utah athletic department forward.

Highly-ranked research development activities between schools and related funding exists outside of the athletics sphere. Most critical funding still comes from governments, not donors, or at least those that support college athletics (athletic donors do tend to support faculty endowments however). So does academic recruiting and whole lot of other things that contribute to a school's academic reputation, to which athletic success typically doesn't help that much. Athletics can play a significant role in the growth and branding of a school, but like it or not, does not really move the academic needle very much.

And I'm willing to concede both Randall and the prior President wanted to continue in the Pac and be with the Northwest and California schools in the B1G, but that has way more to do with sports, than academics. Randall very much has the same background as Lyons and Furd's Levin, and knows them both well. He doesn't need to be in their sports conference to make inroads on joint research. UofUtah is the prime driver on computer graphics and in other tech areas for historical reasons, as well as other areas, and I suspect there will be more joint research between the schools, particularly as northern Utah's population and the school's enrollment have such high secular growth rates. I suspect it is more likely that Utah ends-up in the B1G next than the ACC, possibly with Cal and Furd if they get their act together. I know the B1G wants AAU schools academically, but once that minimal criteria is met (Nebraska, Rutgers and Maryland are not exactly the Ivy League), then it all about the math for the sports programs.


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Big C
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12:59p, 5/28/24

Maybe as Rich Lyons continues to shape our "brand", one of its facets could be real free speech, where anybody is welcome to speak. If someone disagrees, they can exercise their right to free speech and intelligent debate can ensue.
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1:00p, 5/28/24
wifey, well stated & think we're both in agreement that prez randall's aspirational academics for the university of utah to become a top 10 public university in the united states is 100% commendable & that we're both rooting for taylor in this quest regardless of the school's conference athletic affiliation(s)

so why is being aspirational academically important?

for the individual with the lottery tix opportunity to attend cal, stanford or the ivy leagues (yeah mit & cit are right there too but don't play sports) it's a family/society changing roadmap to potentially building generational wealth in a highly competitive global economy that unremorsefully favors the well educated...dumb azzs r often handing out towels & moving boxes and lying to girls in old town on friday nite's that they r multi millionaires

bet

it's also critical that universities are also aspirational academically...the sanctity of elections/democracy is based upon educated people making informed decisions, not understanding politics/history or how **** works in the real world is how russia ended up with putin...make no mistake about it uneducated/undereducated voters make dumb decisions & that can put us all in a **** situation

and that's why becky g wanted us all to vote for richard lyons as the berkeley chancellor & andrew mcgraw as the next athletic director...we're half way home!!!!

https://instagr.am/p/BK1PpkdD858
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PaulCali
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In reply to mbBear • 4:01p, 5/28/24
"Cultural capital" is one of those ambiguous, ill-defined terms to which everyone can apply their own meaning. But, whatever, I'd much rather have economic, or financial, capital. Perhaps cultural capital is something you put forth when you're broke.
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wifeisafurd
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In reply to Shocky1 • 5:22p, 5/28/24
Shocky1 said:
wifey, well stated & think we're both in agreement that prez randall's aspirational academics for the university of utah to become a top 10 public university in the united states is 100% commendable & that we're both rooting for taylor in this quest regardless of the school's conference athletic affiliation(s)

so why is being aspirational academically important?

for the individual with the lottery tix opportunity to attend cal, stanford or the ivy leagues (yeah mit & cit are right there too but don't play sports) it's a family/society changing roadmap to potentially building generational wealth in a highly competitive global economy that unremorsefully favors the well educated...dumb azzs r often handing out towels & moving boxes and lying to girls in old town on friday nite's that they r multi millionaires

bet

it's also critical that universities are also aspirational academically...the sanctity of elections/democracy is based upon educated people making informed decisions, not understanding politics/history or how **** works in the real world is how russia ended up with putin...make no mistake about it uneducated/undereducated voters make dumb decisions & that can put us all in a **** situation

and that's why becky g wanted us all to vote for richard lyons as the berkeley chancellor & andrew mcgraw as the next athletic director...we're half way home!!!!

https://instagr.am/p/BK1PpkdD858
Agreed.

That said, before we go around bashing other counties take a look at what choices our own system is giving us for leaders in November. In this country, less than one-third of Americans think college is worth the cost.

Sorry this is so long, but before Becky B anoints Lyons to sainthood, let's dig deeper at what he is facing. He is an old white male who was Dean of the least (or one of the least) diverse school on campus, and I night add represents all sorts of ties to the country's economic elites (which by the way I consider a good thing). He has not assumed office yet, but Lyons should look at Randall's experience to gain some insight, since their backgrounds are essentially the same. Guys who spent their entire time at their undergrad alma maters, taught and were Dean of the business schools, were huge donor generators, love sports, etc.


The Controversial Presidency of Taylor RandallThe Daily Utah Chroniclehttps://dailyutahchronicle.com 2022 February 22

University of Utah EDI Director Breaks Culture of Silence ...SLUG Magazinehttps://www.slugmag.com activism-outreach-education



Until the last couple of decades, most college presidents were senior faculty members, or professors who had acquired management experience as university deans. At more elite schools, the President often was someone who had been the President of a less academically prominent school or a school that paid less. Today, about 1/3rd of college Presidents have business backgrounds and lack any prior experience managing a college or university. Looking at the flagship state and private schools there often now is a compromise for an academic that had run an entrepreneurial function such as a medical school or business school. Just look at Harvard, UCLA,, Stanford, now Cal, Utah (Randall succeeded a MD), and on and on. These "professional" school leaders raise concerns with faculties. First, is they focus on a management hierarchy, while faculties often see universities functioning best in a state of managerial limits. One purpose of a college is for new thinking, new ideas and new perspectives, not what some manager wants as part of some school "business plan." This may be less of an issue at already bureaucratic Cal. The second is somewhat related in that professional college leaders are focused on the practical. They want to know that a particular course of study will lead directly to job and a better career, that is not necessarily in academia, in order to better serve their customers, the students. The classical approach is that a general education should help the student customers form values and skills, they can get the practical after they leave. That may less true today, where most students make a significant effort to understand what they want given the outrageous cost of higher education. In any event, you can see the mindset of President Randall in this article, and his comments trying to explain why polls show how little Americans now respect higher education:

https://www.ksl.com/article/50877839/higher-education-leads-to-individual-societal-and-economical-benefits-analysts-say?utm_source=email_share&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=news&utm_content=educationts

But Lyons faces some issues he has to deal with besides athletics. There are Palestinian protests, EDI, lack of living spaces near campus, student mental health, and other issues that are common to other colleges. No one really gives a crap in conservative Utah what the Utah faculty thinks, as evidenced by the State legislature dismantling of DEI. Berkeley is very different. He also faces budget issues with the State's ever growing deficit. He will need a honeymoon where he gains the trust that Christ walked in with as a feminist, liberal arts type. For those expecting him to tackle some of the more endemic Cal issues overnight, I would caution that isn't going to happen. Lyons needs some time to change hearts and minds not to mention how he is going to handle likely budget cuts.
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Shocky1
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In reply to Shocky1 • 5:49p, 5/28/24
Shocky1 said:


loosely edited transcript of berkeley grad herm edwards getting fired by chancellor crow & athletic director ray anderson (who is also his agent, kinda a conflict but whatever) in the endzone after losing by a couple of touchdowns to eastern michigan voc ed high school:

herm: what up guys, are we still tailgating later or what, how's that insatiable appetite?

ray: don't get emotional, herm, that ain't like you, you outta know i got a heavy heart but me and michael are gonna walk you to your car

herm: your getting cynical and that won't do, yesterday is still leaking from the roof, can we please be absolutely sure?

michael: herm baby, it's been nice

herm: is there gonna be a mirrorball for me?

ray (winking): yeah we gonna pay you your full contract, no negotiated buyout

herm (smiling): do you know the way to san jose?

https://instagr.am/p/C2A31ncPafp
asu update:

recently got invited by my golf buddy mr silverleaf sun angel to a cocktail/dinner party at his tree fort with asu prez dr michael crow

in a group setting when asked wut keeps him up at night, dr crow responded that he keeps asking himself if arizona state university is successfully preparing its young alums to thoughtfully use critical thinking skills in order to participate in future elections?

in football news, former berkeley grads ben coleman is the sun devils projected starting left guard & decarlos brooks is rb2

forks up#
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In reply to Shocky1 • 9:41p, 5/28/24
Shocky1 said:
the following is a reprint from cal's monster class back in the day:

visited this morning the recently opened nicklaus design group ferry point golf course just outside of nyc with panoramic views of the manhattan skyline

https://instagr.am/p/C7dS0GksHlA
arrive from my hotel by cab at the clubhouse around 7:30 am to stretch & warm up at the practice facility

upon arrival the head golf professional tells me that ferry point's developer donald trump heard that as a golf digest & golf magazine rankings panelist that i had an 8:10 tee time and would i like to play with the donald at 8:20 am instead?

so i say sure, no big deal, let's do this

so we make the introductions on the practice green & the 1st thing i notice is that trump has the weirdest color hair ever (kinda yellow orange) & that he has total man boobs along with an oversized obnoxious red cap

i walk & carry my lightweight leather mackzenie bag while the donald drives a golf cart literally to within 6 inches of every green...just as annoyingly, we then proceed to play thru every group on the golf course in front of us (why does he do this, why not just take the 1st tee time?)...it's funny to watch people's reactions as he dictates the playing thru, some golfers are understandably agitated while others want a selfie with him on their phones, he very clearly enjoys all the drama he's created

so he tells us while we wait for the short par 4 8th green to clear that he thinks ferry point is one of the greatest golf courses in the united states (it isn't, there are at least a dozen courses on long island & the hamptons that are significantly better) & that he's qualified to make that statement because of his extensive travels around the globe playing golf, that nobody knows golf architecture better than him & that includes actual golf architects

so in front of his 2 buddies & his cart caddie i tell the donald that actually i'm one of the 13 guys (and the youngest) to have played the world top 100 courses & stare him down...total silence, one of his buddies who is the chairman of macys starts to laugh & donald play punches my shoulder kinda hard, he's been pwned...whatever

dude is an interesting guy but playing golf with him is not really a celebration of the game but more like riding a roller coaster



you're fired, shocky#


yeah shocky is probably the only california golden bear on planet earth that's been punched by donald trump

shocky is unbreakable (but why can't he learn how to do a handstand?)#
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5:58a, 5/29/24
https://instagr.am/p/CaqngRgrexj
just got an email from andrew mulder (director of premium sales & service) & emily baptista (premium client relations specialist) addressed to those of that prepaid our esp 50 yardline seats in perpetuity (or 30 years or something) when memorial stadium converted to the seat licensing model after the renovations

apparently we belong to the founders club

the perks include a FREE piece of clothing with the founders club logo:
https://stores.inksoft.com/cal_founders_club/shop/home

it appears that the gear is NOT offered in shocky's favorite color fuschia

there is also an invitation to the founders club's 1st "exclusive" event at berkeley country club on august 9th...probably not gonna be there but that will change if chancellor rich lyons will be announcing andrew mcgraw as the next athletic director

yeah the icing on the cake at memorial stadium is kinda melting in the dark (cuz someone left it out in the rain) while the old men are playing checkers in the park by the trees but mostly all i recall is ur yellow cotton dress floating around ur knees (and wondering why)


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6:58a, 5/29/24


back in the day during the cal's monster class (https://bearinsider.com/forums/8/topics/11616/1) of 11,000 loud as **** crazy azz fans stormin' the floor after their mcdonalds all americans delivered epic victories the cost of a basketball ONLY practice facility on the north parking lot adjacent to haas pavillion wuz $21,500,000

shocky made the INNOVATIVE suggestion to those in power that we sell the courtside seats in perpetuity for $1,000,000 per pair with a goal of 25 FOUNDERS CLUB members or $25,000,000 to pay for the basketball only practice facility



and shocky offered to personally collect the $25,000,000 upfront (after the reckless over budget spending on the memorial stadium debt fiasco berkeley capital projects requirements wuz changed to mandate that all funding must be collected before the 1st shovel is in the ground, shocky is a staunch financial conservative) from his fellow courtside seat donors (along with own donation of $1,000,000) & keep in mind at that point we had a lead donation commitment of $10,000,000 from doug & lisa goldman (before knowlton alienated them & that pledge got pulled) to get us up to $35,000,000 for a tricked out facility...my personable/relentless fundraising skills & follow up are 2nd to none & this would've 100% been a done deal if shocky's infrastructure deal wuz approved



these days general james knowlton is still peddling his $140,000,000+ artist rendering of a 3 story con artist practice facility for multiple sports (that nobody cares about like quidditch) that will NEVER evah get built

yeah dumb azz usually make dumb decisions which results in a **** situation



the magic of cal basketball (involves stormin' the floor!!!)#
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7:37a, 5/29/24
https://instagr.am/p/C7hnaMuvouC
shocky at 9:30 am modern yoga#
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Johnfox
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7:47a, 5/29/24
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Shocky1
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12:22p, 5/29/24
https://instagr.am/p/C38o2mKymBM
foxy, jovani ruff would be a transformational cornerstone foundational building block for a 2025 cal's monster class plus he got mcdonald's all american upside

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In reply to Shocky1 • 12:33p, 5/29/24
Shocky1 said:
https://instagr.am/p/C7hnaMuvouC
shocky at 9:30 am modern yoga#

gulp, that **** didn't go as planned for the monster

but make no mistake about it: the bear will not quit, the bear will not die, the bear will not go to the buc-ee's in terrell texas off the I-20 adjacent to the university of calveston 2025 spring ball practice facility & order a super sized bbq brisket chili dog with half a dozen slabs of chocolate fudge with fuschia sprinkles & then wash it down with a diet dr pepper, got it?

burp#
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3:35p, 5/29/24



exclusive MAJOR cal's monster offensive line annoucement:

coach bloesch just texted me advising me that after rushing touchdown this fall at memorial stadium that his trench workers are gonna take their helmets off in the end zone & together swing their hair in wild azz circle loops while the cal band plays & the cannon on tightwad hill BOOOOOOMS as part of a soon to be epic gameday celebration tradition

real talk: bastian swinney needs hair extensions (otherwise this **** will NOT work)#

https://instagr.am/p/C7mr2SEsF79
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5:34p, 5/29/24

confidential message to dr don grizzell: ur my FAVORITE cal burner & u add smiles to my life, ur NOT alone even tho we've never met

https://instagr.am/p/C7kPo3kvb5F
wut's ur comfort food (it sucks there's no buc-ee's in menlo park or san francisco)?...go ahead & eat/drink some really unhealthy **** & then take a really long nap (it helps if doggy dog(s) r with u) with zero light in the room (do u got blackout shades), ok?...when u awaken just tackle one problem at a time

https://instagr.am/p/CdZfqytj5Da
the truth is that none of us ever really know wut someone else is going thru...


life is NOT linear (ay caramba)#
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bluehenbear
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9:11p, 5/29/24
https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/ncaaf/2024/05/29/shilo-sanders-deion-sanders-bankruptcy-questions/73888209007/
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sonofabear51
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In reply to Shocky1 • 10:20p, 5/29/24
And if that is true, that is bloody awesome!!

Can't wait!!
Start Slowly and taper off
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12:17a, 5/30/24
excerpt from the daily bruin:

Keeping up with the Big Ten will be no easy feat for UCLA. Chancellor Gene Block told the UC Regents in 2022 that UCLA expects to spend an additional $10.32 million each year on travel, along with mental health, nutrition and academic support resources for athletes roughly the same amount being shunted to Cal.

keep in mind cal got more teams (30) than ucla (21) & travel to acc schools is further afar than big 10 schools...knowlton never shares any financial information but it's financially conservative to project fiscal year 24/25 cal athletics travel costs as increasing at least $15,000,000

https://instagr.am/p/BSUJiUPAMIn
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