I hope he rises to the occasion and meets the challenge head on so that we can see him on the field to show off his explosiveness!

A little 2025 timeline:
2/12: AD Jim Knowlton extends Softball HC Chelsea Spencer’s contract.
6/16: Jim Knowlton announces his retirement effective 7/1
6/24: Spencer resigns as head coach “in order to prioritize her mental health.”https://t.co/b0QzXupIZw

— Sean “Yoda” Rouse @seanyodarouse@mastodon.social (@seanyodarouse) September 1, 2026

sexual coercion allegations against the former cal softball head coach chelsea spencer (that wuz extended by knowlton just months prior at the recommendation of the EVIL as **** JENNIFER SIMON-O'NEIL)

chancellor lyons, you need to look in the mirror and ask you what kinda person do you strive to be??

are you gonna address these DISTURBING allegations with the berkeley community, after the women's swimmers abuse allegations why did you promote jenny to co athletic director and then just recently extend her $500,000 salary this past july 1st??

real talk: bill "shocky" schulz wuz the 1st and LOUDEST voice against former employees athletic director james knowlton, marketing director markeisha everrett & cfo tom lowry, now he's demanding that the chancellor allow dan mogulof to do his job in protecting our students and the worldwide reputation of berkeley & IMMEDIATELY TERMINATE both jennifer simon-o'neil & jay larson

Shocky1 said:

---

Big dub vibes 😊#GoToreros | #LasToreras pic.twitter.com/iDF56BaDKo

— San Diego Women's Soccer (@USDwsoccer) August 23, 2026

university of san diego toreros 1
california golden bears 0

the cal women's soccer team is now 0-2-2 on the season after losing to an excited low mid major program (with minimal financial resources unlike cal) kinda like softball, volleyball, lacrosse, field hockey, cross country & track & field that are basically uncompetitive under the FAILED leadership of non berkeley grad JENNIFER SIMON-O'NEIL

the women's hoops team despite generational marketable talent lulu "let it fly" twidale is making no inroads in selling tixs or increasing the fan base particularly among the critically needed student body despite a FUN team that won 21 games last season, that's just an utter failure of an inept marketing department aka the rebranded strawberry creek studios that is incapable of competing in today's 6 second attention span economy at a time that the valkyries are SOLD OUT on gamedays with 18,046 new fans for the wnba expansion franchise (which got highly effective innovative targeted marketing at previously ignored consumer sectors *lgbt)

rich, when are you gonna hold your worthless bureaucrat co-athletic directors accountable??

this is cal women's athletics (as enabled by a well intended but feckless chancellor that don't give 2 ***** about the experiences of berkeley's female student athletes (we will NEVER forget the abused women's swimmers)#

---

so who is the current coach for the cal women's soccer team (that has had his contracted extended by JENNIFER SIMON-O'NEIL)??

https://instagr.am/p/DPwvSUXktaj
that would be head coach neil mcguire, read here about the current lawsuit allegations of bullying & harassment against him and the uc regents, sound familiar??
https://www.ktvu.com/news/former-cal-athlete-allowed-to-sue-her-coach-and-university-in-a-precedent-setting-case

https://instagr.am/p/DcmEDuHBmMe
chancellor lyons, why would any student athlete parent (except those from maybe the all white elite prep school sports of lacrosse & field hockey that are from some of the wealthiest enclaves on planet earth that are putting out varsity blues admission vibes) want to send their daughter to berkeley to play sports under your watch??

and whose paying for all these women student athlete lawsuits, the BIG GIVE??
https://nypost.com/2026/06/21/us-news/ex-cal-swimmers-win-legal-victory-against-uc-berkeley-in-coach-abuse-lawsuit/

https://instagr.am/p/Dcwr0e7DVuL


not everybody associated with cal athletics is evil as ****#

Jordan Somerville on the most improved position unit thus far

“I would say Offensive line. That really comes with communication, it’s the number one thing we echo. Those 5 being on the same page. We can do that, we have a chance.” pic.twitter.com/KHIjTwVBXw

— Thomas Dunn (@Thomasdunn24) September 1, 2026

cal's MONSTER (finally) offensive line (keeping JKS outta alta bates *harm's way is CRITICAL to an EPIC 2026 season)!!#


^ sioape, u need a comb brah

unlv injury update: o-line leader & former 4.0 gpa cal recruit austin boyd gotta messed up ankle sat nite & the program is still awaiting the results of his mri testing, his status for the hawaii game is unknown (his replacement at center is terrible as is the rebs starting right tackle former bear jackson brown who got used more than a callaway rental club driver at top golf, unlv gave up 6 sacks to memphis)

go bows#

Jaron-Keawe Sagapolutele on comparing and contrasting game week 1 from last year to now

“Definitely a lot more comfortable. More excited than I was last year. Never played in huge crowds like this before. Now having a year underneath my belt, excited to go out there and play in… pic.twitter.com/ylobm9CLyM

— Thomas Dunn (@Thomasdunn24) September 1, 2026

posting on this board's gameday threads is for aged out bears fans that are concerned about the pregame coin flip & the past mvps of the las vegas bowl (and there's nothing wrong with that, go be great & make sure u get the 5:00 pm sr citizen salt FREE buffet discount at lubys)#

https://instagr.am/p/DaatrcOMfwi
^ and if he's afraid of the scary azz cliffside elevator down to the yoga center/tennis courts/diving deck at the amalfi coast's sun drenched il san pietro di positano, a la poubelle!!

https://instagr.am/p/DI0-7QasB-_

I know it’s not at home but these “Week in Athletics” emails need to include road games
How is @UCLAFootball not here pic.twitter.com/206OXZL8w2

— A Son of Westwood (@eyelovelaa) September 2, 2026

is 8 clap a std like siblings & ****??

https://instagr.am/p/Dcw0nVoAFAP

https://instagr.am/p/DcyblWGkUqJ
^ why is knowlton (all white people kinda look the same) walking behind tiger??

https://instagr.am/p/DSspPFOEu1L
^ same baby mamas, different deadbeat dads
happy (not my rescue doggy dog aka scrappy doo & his lil sister beauty) hour on the farm (it's all right now...sort of)#

Tiger Woods crashed Rory McIlroy's Masters ceremonypic.twitter.com/Kg6u09CTzZ

— Bet105 (@bet_105) April 13, 2026

ADMINISTRATIVE NOTE: this is the 9th consecutive post by shocky, he cannot post again unless there is monster reader posts/engagement per the rules of the bearinsider.com

I hope our game Sat night does not come down to a field goal Gents...

https://instagr.am/p/DW9j2OsFMwo
https://instagr.am/p/CjzTtGcD-ZL
^ how the **** do the davis bros drink daily 32 oz green juices to promote excellent gut health (and facilitate pooping like a race horse/the shockster)??

Dabo Swinney said Christopher Vizzina will start over Tait Reynolds "this week." https://t.co/QVIqAzTB1P

— Pete Nakos (@PeteNakos) September 1, 2026

qb battle in tiger land: last year's qb1 cade klubnik is now a qb2 for the new york jets

Cal RB Adam Mohammed on his growth with Cal RB Coach Keith Bhonapha

“He’s patient with us. That’s something you want. You can go to for tips, he will walk you through eye progressions. Him honing on the details, it’s nice.” pic.twitter.com/salimiDXmX

— Thomas Dunn (@Thomasdunn24) September 1, 2026

edited outtakes from rb1 adam mohammed interview:

new york times: what was your gpa at apollo high school and what is the extent of your knowledge regarding maps?

adam: i got a 3.6 gpa on 47th avenue and i know unlike coach lup that berkeley is the #1 ranked public university in the WORLD!!

jeff faraudo: it's not clear to me at all because i lack any inside sources on the staff, why did you leave washington when you were expected to be the rb1 in seattle this season?

adam: let me break it down for you: 1) seattle weather is depressing as ****, in case you haven't figured it out yet mental health is kinda important in life, 2) coach bhon promised me multiple PITCHOUTS on the edges in wide open spaces during the ucla game, 3) berkeley's ELITE education is gonna open doors and help me build generational wealth after my football days are over, 4) oakland is a much shorter flight from sky harbor than seattle for the fam on fall gamedays and most importantly 5) me and shocky are gonna build a FUN award winning ginormous fisherman's wharf with legos!!

cbyf1 espn reporter with a triggering ponytail (winking at our student athlete): what's the key to building world class lego communities with shocky?

adam: well both me and shocky believe in authenticity, when building this san francisco project we both wore yellow flotation devices and our lunches included freshly baked sourdough bread during our creative work together, yeah we're both married to the game!!

https://instagr.am/p/DZ8TV_xEq1v


u ready for this saturday nite at 7:30 pm??

Bill,
Are you in the stands our on the sidelines this Sat. ?

^ probable kinda gameday outfit (just add the now weathered cal lid that des gave me for FREE back in the day, shocky is an anti possessions/hoarding minimalist & don't throw away **** just because its getting older, my yoga mat is almost a decade old & my blue lexus convertible wheels got 250k+ miles) for this sat nite's uc championship depending on the nor cali weather

swany, would welcome the opportunity to meet u in person & talk golf!!

like a lotta berkeley, stanford & ivy league grads shocky got some unresolved ocd issues (them monkey voices always talking in his head that need to calm the **** down) & is already kinda planning (ucla grads don't gotta lotta thoughts in their heads other than how they gonna beat the current pending shoplifting at erewhon charges against them) saturday as follows:

sometime in the morning: yoga/mediation class, another failed handstand attempt (sigh)

noon: lunch in san francisco with hong kong bear & his wife

2:45 pm: game of h-o-r-s-e with my favorite australian, let it fly lulu, let it fly!!
https://instagr.am/p/DcJ3KbvEknM
3:30 pm: cali bears vs ibiza nightclub chainsmokers volleyball match (root for all the cbyf1s with triggering ponytails that r under 5'6", both of them)
https://instagr.am/p/DcyGKz0sb4q
5:30 pm: my haas biz ad school go to meal of 2 cheese slices (sprinkled liberally with oregano) & a regular coke (probably the only non sugar free soft drink of the month) at blondies & then munching this down while walking thru campus among the giant redwoods along strawberry creek up to the stadium
https://instagr.am/p/DczNwybMWUz
6:30 pm: on the field in the north end zone watching early warm ups for cal's MONSTER (finally) offensive line...learn new potty mouth vocabulary words from uncle famika!!...try to figure out whose gonna be the swing tackle2 & interior o-lineman2 in the playing rotation that will spell the starters

7:30 pm: at my 50 yard line perch at the top of the field club section in a mid 20s row probably sitting alone (but not sure if that will work this season with the potential for SOLD OUT acc battles)...the monster likes to be dialed in 1000% during games & not be distracted by a seat mate, my favorite seat mates are those that don't really give 2 ***** about the game like my golf buddy slim wadie (a white guy with a couple of creighton degrees/played golf for the bluejays, once made the very interesting observation near the bears teams buses after the EPIC northwestern roadie that almost half of the bearents wuz white moms & black dads ala j kidd) & my daughter taylor (who asked me back in the day during a last minute tied up hoops upset against #1 ranked arizona how many points wuz a free throw??...last september at boston college after an interception asked me why wuz jaron throwing the ball to the other team??)...tay already tole me she got a good book to read at next week's eastcoastie roadie at syracuse, sigh

seconds after the final whistle: if the bears win STORM THE ******* FIELD at the speed of light past the armed totalitarian yellow jacket security detail towards the center of the universe with our hearts drunk with a love/beauty that our minds will never fully comprehend!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

KAAAABBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!

do u or anybody else got any gameday traditions??

Bill,
I'll be seated with my bro in my mid-level field club seats on the 35 yard line (north), Section FF.
Would enjoy talking golf over green juice or coffee.
I did meet you and your lovely daughter Taylor in the men's locker room during the C. Martin days. Good times.
David (AKA Swan)

^ david, just sent you a private message
___________________________________________________________

cal's monster class golf SCOUTING report:

https://instagr.am/p/DHpBODQyxpZ
them cali bears open this season on september 7th-8th at the usc trojans hosted Birdies, Eagles and Broken Condoms collegiate tournament at the gila riiver indian community (just south of phoenix), the shockster advance scouting report is as follows:

weather: shocky arrived at the course's parking lot around noon today, the temperature wuz a comfortable (for me) 98% with a light breeze & no humidity...it will be key for our 5 cali bears to HYDRATE at least 24 hours in advance (waiting until gameday no es bueno)

course routing: as a resort course it's not a golden age era tightly connected routing but other than the bridge walks across the dry wash between the 1st-2nd and 17th-18 holes it's not too bad, shocky walked all 18 holes as a single (didn't see another player the entire round) in a leisurely 2 hours & 45 minutes (and smells now kinda like week old laundry)

course conditions: fairways are kinda spongy (which limits roll but also makes the fairways wider) with immaculate bermuda lies with the ball sitting up beautifully due to the limited play, the very smooth greens are running 10 (9 into the grain, 11 down grain) on the stimp & the sandraps are well maintained

fairway width: very generous off the tee with 40+ yard fairways & then another 20+ yards of playing corridors with the sub 1 inch bermuda rough on the dead flat course

greens: unlike many public courses in the desert during summertime, the whirlwind greens are very receptive & also remarkably FLAT...most 15-20 footers are either left or right edge (this is NOT pasatiempo)

length: the par 72 design tips out at 7220 yards (there are also additional back tees on the 2nd, 4th, 12th & 15th holes that are not on the scorecard), the head pro tole me the usc head coach will be entirely responsible for the tee markers & pin positions, the trojans won the tourney last year in a shootout at 52 under par!!

KEY HOLES:

1st hole (par 4, 413 yards): the most narrow looking hole on cattail with 2 large fairway bunkers down the right side with desert (lost ball) further right but that's an optical illusion because the 1st & 18th holes are contiguous...the architect gary panks (who wuz a us amateur level player back in the day) wants the collegiate golfer to aim at the tree in the left rough with a fade as there's a million miles of fairway left of the 1st fairway, any bear losing his opening tee shot down the right side should lose their scholly for being such a poor course strategy dumb azz!!

https://instagr.am/p/DZaDvi5hVum
5th hole (par 4, 337 yards): it's morikawa 16th hole at harding park GO TIME, the bunker right of the putting surface is the start line!!

11th hole (par 3, 245 yards): the toughest hole on the course for collegians, critical to aim for the middle of the green in all 3 rounds as the lurking front right bunker will likely be the most raked sand trap on the course

12th hole (par 4, 481 yards): do NOT try to cut the corner with a cluster of trees & the desert on the inside of the dogleg, there is a massive swath of light rough right of the fairway

18th hole (par 4, 450 yards): will be important to hit a couple of tee balls during sunday's practice round to determine if the hell's half acre fairway bunker can be carried, if so the drive will hit a ginormous downslope kickplate with massive turbo bounces resulting in a gap wedge

dinner: shocky highly recommends his favorite ramen spot in the valley of the sun, Origami Ramen (opened by a former chef at schulzy's favorite restaurant on planet earth, nobu malibu) which is low key unpretentious in a strip center on ray road sub 10 minutes from the golf course

https://instagr.am/p/CJaXdUNB12q

The most passing yards in a game for @lopezgio1 since 2024. It ain't even halftime 😳 https://t.co/FFrlriwH3L pic.twitter.com/dpd4UESDZS

— Wake Forest Football (@WakeFB) September 4, 2026

wake forest demon deacons 38
akron zips 16

look shocky stood on the sidelines last season close enuf to know wake forest (1-0) qb1 gio lopez (an unreal 21 of 32 passing for 350 yards against a 7&7 summertime opponent) when he wuz a tar heel is NOT anywhere close to the listed 6' 203 lbs, he's a high iq/moxy left hander (kinda like justin vedder) that is highly accurate when given time but is an undersized overachiever on the field with below average arm strength

let's **** gio up with VIOLENT hits when the deacs bring their cigarette industry (multiple world headquarters are next to campus) cancer stick mascot to berkeley this fall!!

yeah shocky is a big fan of their former dance coach christy (u will have to read the monster's 2024 game report from winston-salem to find out why...or not)!!

https://instagr.am/p/Ce656jpOAo8

#25, 9 to 5, four-wheel drive, cream cheese with chive, doesn't matter Bears by 50 https://t.co/sOCpXLhzTE

— CalCentel (@TheCalCentel) September 2, 2026

fun fact: head football coaches don't actually play in football games (r u gonna be at memorial stadium this weekend??)!!

https://instagr.am/p/DaENg3zsLgi

https://instagr.am/p/Dc2XxzBlmvb
KAAAAABBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

CONGRATS to true freshman parisian callixte alzas shooting an unreal 17 under par in 6 rounds & teammate all american Ziqin Zhou the runner up in qualifying aka The Cliffhanger for next week's usc trojans hosted Birdies, Eagles & Broken Condoms tournament!!

yeah callixte is the greatest thing from the city of lights since morfontaine & paris fashion week, merci beaucoup monsieur joel stalter (haas biz ad grad/retired dp tour winner)!!

https://instagr.am/p/B9SOe4njett

do u or anybody else got any gameday traditions??

When I was growing up, or a student, any time my Dad (Cal '49) came to watch a game together we'd usually go to some of the following, as these were places he'd gone to as a student: Bertola's Italian Restaurant on College Ave in Oakland (now gone), Spenger's Fish Grotto at the base of University Ave (now gone), or Fenton's Ice Creamery in Oakland.

2028 high school recruiting update:

NEWS: Four-Star CB Ca’ron Williams is down to 12 Schools, a source tells @Rivals

He’s ranked as the No. 1 CB in California in the 2028 Rivals Industry Rankingshttps://t.co/uQZ2LtpiFy pic.twitter.com/57FSA7UY6B

— Hayes Fawcett (@Hayesfawcett3) August 27, 2026

the TAKERS get PAID in the NFL (r u ready ca'ron??)!!#

https://instagr.am/p/Dct4qtnp2nK
CONGRATS to the 5 standout cali golden bears starting line up for the 54 hole usc trojans Birdie, Eagles and Broken Condoms tournament 9/6/26 & 9/7/27 based upon 6 round meritocracy qualifying scoring (no favoritism, modeled after the pga tour):

1) callixte alzas-true freshman wuz an unreal 17 UNDER PAR & will play in the #1 slot, tres bon
2) Ziqin Zhou-Z's ascent up the pga tour university rankings starts next monday
3) graham christopher-4.0 gpa true freshman acclimating quickly, competed in the us junior amateur
4) charlie bundy-the monster's favorite biz ad scholar, future wall street ceo/winged foot club champion
5) trevor cox-spends way too much time at legoland & **** but got a great putting stroke & is fiery
individual) xihuan chang-the next michael kim once he builds up his body like mr 59
individual) matthew miyamoto-made it to final qualifying for the us amateur
individual) noah eisen-true freshman from delasalle high school

https://instagr.am/p/DcJEBHTMphV
HYDRATE, HYDRATE, HYDRATE (coke is NOT the solution or the official drink of the cal golf program)!!#

Shocky1 said:

---

One of the most consistent voices we hear at practice is Cal DB Coach Von Brown

Brown on why that’s important to him

“This game gave me everything I got. I do it for the players. Players play, coaches coach. If you bring energy and juice, your players will too. Our DB room, we… pic.twitter.com/yTgGkZWACE

— Thomas Dunn (@Thomasdunn24) August 12, 2026

^ check out the female staffer (nice fingernail polish sweetie) to the far right holding up the backdrop tryna be invisible!!

who the **** knew that coach king von brown raps on the side (his death is fake news) & that he don't want no guys in his room that are from 63rd??

yeah first things first, cal's monster class is the ONLY reliable source for up to date OFF THE RECORD accurate information about **** or something


^ white people r funny!!

it's now or never for the TAKERS (this **** is not for show)!!#

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university on planet earth (including the o block of parkway gardens in the windy city & kankakee)

---

Cal CB Ricky Fletcher on preparing for UCLA

“Very excited. I know they’re a run heavy team with a lot of speed on the outside. Got some good outside guys who can catch the ball. Going to be a good matchup. We feel very ready, honing into our preparation.” pic.twitter.com/95R1GMXgJt

— Thomas Dunn (@Thomasdunn24) September 1, 2026

edited outtakes from cb1 ricky fletcher interview:

new york times: what's the difference between between your teammates at ole miss and cal?

ricky: honestly most of my low gpa rebels teammates wuz dumb as **** and never read books and **** like these high gpa cali boyz

jake curtis (looking at his depth chart notes or something): where's mississippi?

ricky: you would have to ask coach lup that, he's our maps guy

espn cbyf1 reporter with a triggering ponytail (winking at our student athlete): how is coach king von brown preparing his room for the uc championship game?

ricky: he keeps telling us that them bruins are from 63rd!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

https://instagr.am/p/DaVedlaEYbK

It never gets old 😮‍💨🔥

📺: ESPN pic.twitter.com/4oV9lW8FzL

— Miami Hurricanes Football (@CanesFootball) September 5, 2026

miami hurricanes 45
stanford cardinal 6

last season duke qb1 darian mensah lit up cal's bend & eventually break d for 22 of 30 passing for 265 yards & no picks, this year as the canes qb1 darian smoked the slow non +1 athletic cards d for an unreal 27 of 30 passing for 401 yards & no picks...in today's college football it's critical to apply VIOLENT pressure on the opposing quarterback, otherwise ur d is gonna be ****** as dbs can only defend wideouts so long in vertical downfield passing attacks...no BLITZING schemes no es bueno (there wuz zero attempts in palo alto to even try any exotic blitz packages such as apex predators linebacker zack attack follett or safety donnie mcckleskey knocking the **** outta qbs & getting the crowds fired up at memorial back in the day)

Welcome to Malifornia 🙌

📺: ESPN pic.twitter.com/w3zz6ak8oU

— Miami Hurricanes Football (@CanesFootball) September 5, 2026

defensively cards linebacker matt rose is a relentless heat seeking ball tackler but that's not gonna be enough for stanford to win many acc competitions with vanilla d gameday strategies that are non equipped to change the energy/momentum of ball games

honestly stanford (1-1) looks like a wilcox coached team with stale/stubborn predictable offensive & defensive schemes, yeah would rather watch the cbyfy1 flame tosser at mila in south beach than that **** again

2027 high school recruiting update:

Irvine (Calif.) Crean Lutheran OL Ace Herman-Dawson was set to visit Arizona this weekend with several teammates, but will no longer make the visit

"I'm going to Cal this weekend, that's home for me."

Intel: https://t.co/nAv4JpKsYs pic.twitter.com/3SMi9LcnFO

— Greg Biggins (@GregBiggins) September 4, 2026

good call ace, shocky wuz gonna delete ur 3.2 gpa azz from them cali bears 2027 commitment class list

let's be ******* real here, ok??



tuscon is a ****hole truck stop town with trailer park white people retirement communities for low gpa dumb azz ballers (that are attracted to arizona's prevalent online academic fraud for athletes) that got no futures at age 30, ur crean lutheran teammates are gonna be asking u for MONEY after attending a party skool that is widely recognized for producing the most alcoholic intoxicated/unemployable future hourly wage workers in the highly competitive world economy that relentlessly favors berkeley, stanford & ivy league grads particularly with the advances in ai technology (just ask our friends at dialpad)

nobody evah turned down an admissions offer to the harvard medical school in order to become a border patrol major (with a minor in mall security) at irvine valley community college with their non intellectual dumb azz high school buddies, got it??

The World University Rankings 2026 have just been published.

The performance of Asia’s top universities has stalled for the first time in 14 years, while the US continues to decline.

Analysis of the results: https://t.co/FldnUjPV1W #THEUniRankings pic.twitter.com/v0s6ec4ErV

— Times Higher Education (@timeshighered) October 8, 2025

glad that berkeley is gonna be ur POLY home away from home brah, throwing that GENERATIONAL WEALTH building degree (which is gonna require a lotta hard work but someday buying moms a cute new house near the montage in laguna beach is worth ur sweat equity) away would've been the biggest ******* MISTAKE of ur life (other than not changing the stinky litter boxes on date nites)

ace=NOT a dumb azz

https://instagr.am/p/CO5p4zzlR7Q

IM BACK HOME 🐻 THIS WEEKEND

I’ll be at the game, so if you spot me, come say what’s up. The Bear Family is bigger than just Saturdays — I want to meet the people behind it. 🐻

THIS IS BEAR TERRITORY #GoBears pic.twitter.com/yPwPJI2fPl

— Charles Davis III “spida” (@_Charles_Davis_) September 4, 2026

wut up spida man, the monster will be sure to say hello/give u a fist bump during the early pre game warm ups on the field tomorrow nite, u feel me brah??

california golden bears yucky blucky fruitcake classes (mr spieker not amused cuz he got worser seats):

doechii, why don't you introduce the yucky blucky fruitcakes to the class?

2028 class:

brody rudnicki, quarterback (4.0 gpa)

2027 class:

alius mayo, cornerback (3.54 gpa)
dajohn yarborough, offensive lineman (3.1 gpa)
ace dawson-herman, offensive lineman (3.2 gpa)
zion white, wide receiver (3.1 gpa)
kamil loud, defensive back (3.7 gpa)
jamie sturgeon, tight end (3.2 gpa)
isaiah bertola, offensive lineman (3.15 gpa)
demare dezeure, wide receiver (3.0+ gpa)
jeovanni "jeo" henley, defensive back (3.3 gpa)
jaderian "jd" jones, defensive tackle (3.4 gpa)
josh bunni, offensive lineman (3.0 gpa)
rahzario (zo) edwards, tight end (3.0+ gpa)
elyjah staples, linebacker (4.2 gpa)
dane weber, quarterback (3.8 gpa)
duvay williams, corner/nickel back (3.2 gpa)
jaxsen stokes, running back (3.7 gpa)
miles isaac schirmer, defensive lineman (3.5 gpa)
antwon "aj" sanders iii, running back (3.0+ gpa)
charles "spida" davis iii, wideout (3.0+ gpa)
troy bowens, edge defender (3.7 gpa)
blake gunter, wide receiver (4.0 gpa)
zach brien, kicker (3.8 gpa)
gunnar perry, linebacker (3.46 gpa)
giovanni hodge, edge defender (4.0 gpa)

2026 class:

david bird, longsnapper (4.0 gpa)
jacob johnson, punter (3.1 gpa)
sosaia noa, tight end (3.0+ gpa)
roger vaderhoef, offensive lineman (3.5 gpa)
rico walker, tight end (3.1 gpa)
aj tuitele, linebacker (3.0 gpa)
joshua pierce, edge defender (4.0 gpa)
jayden williams, defensive line (3.1 gpa)
kamar mothudi, inside linebacker (3.3 gpa)
ricky "trenches" fletcher, defensive back (3.3 gpa)
jericho johnson, defensive tackle (3.0+ gpa)
emmanuel okoye, edge defender (strong student from nigeria)
jackson brosseau, quarterback (3.96 gpa)
angus davies, punter (honor roll student from australia)
daniel harris, cornerback (3.1 gpa)
ashton rivera, offensive lineman (3.7 gpa)
kahlee tafai, offensive lineman (3.15 gpa)
ashun shepphard, defensive line (3.0+ gpa)
cooper perry, wide receiver (4.1 gpa)
towns mcgough, kicker (4.0 gpa)
marquis "mgk" groves-killebrew (3.3 gpa)
justin beadles, defensive lineman (3.0 gpa)
tristan jernigan, inside linebacker (3.0+ gpa)
jimothy lewis jr, offensive tackle (3.4 gpa)
michael hurst jr, safety (3.0+ gpa)
chase hendricks, wide receiver (3.21 gpa)
mykeal rabess, offensive lineman (3.68 gpa)
carter vargas, running back (3.2 gpa)
ashten emory, running back (3.7 gpa)
dorian thomas, tight end (3.6 gpa)
adam mohammed, running back (3.5 gpa)
kingston lopa, defensive back (3.0 gpa)
ian strong, wide receiver (3.75 gpa)
jacob arop, offensive lineman (3.0 gpa)
solomon williams, edge defender (3.0+ gpa)
niles davis, athlete (3.71 gpa)
daniel mcmorris, offensive tackle (3.8 gpa)
kai meza, wide receiver (3.6 gpa)
tyree "reekus" sams, wide receiver (3.3 gpa)
kamo'i huihui-white, offensive lineman (3.9 gpa)
nainoa lopes, quarterback (3.57 gpa)
kingston "lucky" schirmer, defensive lineman (3.0 gpa)
esaiah wong, offensive lineman (3.0+ gpa)
frank fauna jr, defensive lineman (4.0 gpa)
emmanuel "ej" morgan, wide receiver/kick returner (4.3 gpa)
taimane purcell, tight end (3.9 gpa)
nemyah telona, defensive lineman (3.0+ gpa)
victor santino, running back (3.0+ gpa)
elisha faamatuainu, offensive lineman (3.0+ gpa)
jaxon pyatt, linebacker (3.4 gpa)
jonathan mckinley, linebacker (4.83 gpa)

2025 class (all former walk ons are now on schollys, CONGRATS!!):

aaron hampton, inside linebacker (3.4 gpa)
jordan king, wide receiver (4.38 gpa)
alonzo esparza, quarterback (4.0 gpa)
belay brummell, quarterback (3.95 gpa)
carson perry-smith, wide receiver (4.1 gpa)
jayden parker, running back (4.16 gpa)
isaac torres, wide receiver (3.5 gpa)
mayze bryant, defensive back (3.5 gpa)
jordan franke, longsnapper (3.81 gpa)
dean taylor-chapman, running back (4.0 gpa)
tobey weydemuller, defensive back (3.92 gpa)
jude mclellan, outside linebacker (3.9 gpa)
nate escalada, defensive back (4.23 gpa)
michael cooley, outside linebacker (3.0 gpa)
ewan arechaederra, longsnapper (3.6 gpa)
lucas vanderlind, inside linebacker (4.2 gpa)
bj jones, inside linebacker (3.55 gpa)
sam bjerke, offensive lineman (3.9 gpa)
cole bosica, wide receiver (4.1 gpa)
myles reber, wide receiver (3.75 gpa)
jeffrey johnson, tight end (3.7 gpa)
jack olyphant, tight end (3.72 gpa)
rj stephens, defensive lineman (3.77 gpa)
dru polidore jr, safety (3.75 gpa)
michael kern, punter (3.4 gpa)
landon morris, tight end (3.7 gpa)
jayden dixon-veal, wide receiver (2.9 gpa)
lj johnson, running back (3.7 gpa)
abram murray, kicker (4.0 gpa)
brent "paco" austin, corner/nickel (3.3 gpa)
jordan sanford, wide receiver (3.5 gpa)
harrison taggart, linebacker (3.9 gpa)
chase meyer, kicker (4.3 gpa)
mark hamper, wide receiver (3.5 gpa)
zae smith, defensive tackle (3.37 gpa)
daveion harley, offensive lineman (3.36 gpa)
kendrick raphael, running back (3.8 gpa)
quimari shemwell, corner/nickel back (3.0+ gpa)
brandon high jr, running back (3.3 gpa)
rino monteforte, longsnapper (4.0 gpa)
tj bush, edge defender (3.3 gpa)
quaron adams, wide receiver (3.0 gpa)
chris victor, edge defender (3.3 gpa)
jojo genova, offensive lineman (3.5 gpa)
erik peters, kicker (3.9 gpa)
devin brown, quarterback (4.4 gpa)
dazmin james, wide receiver (2.6 gpa)
justin hasenhuetl, interior offensive lineman (3.75 gpa)
jacob de jesus, wide receiver/kick returner (3.67 gpa)
caleb johnston, longsnapper (3.5 gpa)
simon mapa, tight end (3.47 gpa)
mason mini, tight end (3.8 gpa)
john gayer, edge defender (2.8 gpa)
jordon moko, offensive line (3.8 gpa)
jayden wayne, edge defender (4.0 gpa)
brook honoree jr, punter (3.8 gpa)
dominic ingrassia, quarterback (3.2 gpa)
jaron keawe sagapolutele, quarterback (3.75 gpa)
buom jock, inside linebacker (3.1 gpa)
leon bell, offensive tackle (3.1 gpa)
tristan dunn, safety (3.0 gpa)
lamar robinson, offensive guard (3.5 gpa)
tyson ruffins, interior offensive lineman (3.8 gpa)
lajuan owens, left tackle (3.2 gpa)
hezekiah masses, corner/nickel (2.7 gpa)
kyle cunanan, kicker (3.73 gpa)
tyson ford, defensive lineman (3.4 gpa)
odera okaka, edge defender (3.3 gpa)
john tofi jr, edge defender (3.8 gpa)
aiden manutai, safety (4.0 gpa)
tre' harrison, safety (4.83 gpa)
mike klisiewicz, offensive lineman (3.7 gpa)
jacob houseworth, tight end (3.15 gpa)
jae'on young, corner/nickel back (3.4 gpa)
lebron williams, defensive end (3.2 gpa)
beckham barney, inside linebacker (4.2 gpa)
anthony league, running back (3.9 gpa)
ikechukwu okafor, edge defender (3.7 gpa)
ben howard, offensive guard (3.2 gpa)
meyer swinney, hybrid wide receiver/tight end (3.75 gpa)
kaden cook, cornerback (3.4 gpa)

2024 class:

will mcdonald, left guard (3.5 gpa)
cheikhsaliou fall, edge defender (3.3 gpa)
cj harris, quarterback (3.5 gpa)
serigne tounkara, edge defender (3.88 gpa)
kyion graves, wide receiver (3.3 gpa)
ryan yaites, safety (3.2 gpa)
jasiah wagoner, corner/nickel back (3.25 gpa)
tj bollers, edge defender (4.0 gpa)
corey dyches, hybrid tight end/wide receiver (3.1 gpa)
braden miller, offensive tackle (4.0 gpa)
liam johnson, inside linebacker (3.36 gpa at princeton)
khamani hudson, cornerback (3.5 gpa)
bobby engstler, punter/kicker (3.72 gpa)
jonathan "gameday" brady, wide receiver (3.2 gpa)
mikey miller, wide receiver (3.8 gpa)
victor stoffel, offensive tackle (motivated student in sweden)
kadarius calloway, running back (2.7 gpa)
ryan coe, kicker (3.5 gpa)
tobias merriweather, wide receiver (3.6 gpa)
ja'ir smith, defensive back (3.0+ gpa)
syris corley, offensive lineman (3.0 gpa)
rush reimer, offensive lineman (3.3 gpa)
marcus harris, defensive back (3.2 gpa)
aidan ikaika keanaaina, defensive tackle (4.0 gpa)
aiden newbill, offensive line (3.72 gpa)
isaiah crosby, safety (3.0+ gpa)
luke ferrelli, inside linebacker (4.0 gpa)
chandler rogers, quarterback (3.3 gpa)
teddye buchanan, inside linebacker (3.5 gpa)
josiah martin, wide receiver (3.5 gpa)
jack endries, tight end (3.83 gpa)
trond grizzell, wide receiver (3.8 gpa)
bj canady, defensive tackle (3.91 gpa)
legend journey, apex predator edge defender (3.3 gpa)
ej caminong, quarterback (3.5 gpa)
dayton "dayday" aupiu, defensive back (3.51 gpa)
jamaal wiley, running back (2.75 gpa)
trevor rogers, wide receiver (3.5 gpa)
michael-anthony okwura, defensive lineman (3.4 gpa)
eze osondu, inside linebacker (3.5 gpa)
brookyln cheek, defensive back (2.9 gpa)
camden jones, tight end (2.7 gpa)
tyler knape, offensive line (3.8 gpa)

2023 class:
barrett miller, offensive lineman (4.2 hs gpa & stanford mechancial engineering degree)
taj davis, wide receiver (3.2 gpa)
king doerue, running back (3.5 gpa)
isaiah ifanse, running back (3.2 gpa at montana state)
marcus scott ii, cornerback (3.3 gpa at missouri)
tidiane "frenchy" jalloh (motivated student from france)
matthew wykoff, offensive tackle (3.75 gpa)
marquez "mojo" dortch, wide receiver (2.9 gpa)
ben finley, quarterback (4.308 gpa)
patrick mcmorris, safety (3.65 gpa)
david bird, longsnapper (4.0 gpa)
marquis montgomery, wide receiver (3.4 gpa)
martin tine, offensive tackle (2.9 gpa)
stanley mckenzie, nose tackle (3.3 gpa)
david reese, outside linebacker (3.7 gpa)
sam jackson v, quarterback (2.8 gpa)
brian hightower, wide receiver (3.2 gpa)
justin williams-thomas aka j-will, running back (4.0 gpa)
asher alberding, tight end (3.85 gpa)
jt byrne, tight end (3.75 gpa)
lachlan wilson, punter (strong student from australia)
byron caldwell, running back (3.3 gpa)
sergio allen, inside linebacker (3.4 gpa)
matt littlejohn, defensive back (3.0 gpa)
jaivian "the jet" thomas, running back (3.4 gpa)
nohl williams, defensive back (3.61 gpa)
kaylin moore, defensive back (3.4 gpa)
frederick williams iii, offensive line (3.6 gpa)
zurich ashford, defensive end (3.62 gpa)
ben marshall, tight end (3.4 gpa)
ryan mcculloch, outside linebacker (4.1 gpa)
tiumalu afalava, defensive line (4.1 gpa)
cade uluave, inside linebacker (3.85 gpa)
sailasa vadrawale, defensive back (3.46 gpa)
nyziah hunter, wide receiver (2.7 gpa)
nick morrow, offensive tackle (3.7 gpa)
michael luckhurst, kicker (4.37 gpa)



wow, that was quite the introduction, doechii, we're gonna have to talk after class...don't forget to take the chicken out

https://instagr.am/p/DAb8NtkBYtv

What's gonna happen Sat night Shocky...?

dwm, on some level you, the monster & the other almost 60,000 SOLD OUT fans all know that closely (which will be impossible for clinically depressed lazy azz/maybe incarcerated sofa king tv fans like not so bright bear but the good news is that there is still time to make plans to be at memorial stadium tonite) watching cal's MONSTER (finally) offensive line will reveal the keys to which team is gonna capture the hearts moving forward of the 2 high expectations fanbases in tonite's uc championship battle!!

will tyson, sioape, jimothy, bastian & frederick successfully PROTECT the program's generational talent humble FAITH based 3.75 gpa lefty qb1 from ewa beach in the downfield vertical passing attack & create running lanes (the bears wuz an abysmal 133rd outta 134 teams last season in rushing) for the uber talented 3.6 gpa rb1 from apollo high school on rolo/somerville dialed up PITCHOUTS to the edges in wide open spaces that will result in the most EPIC off to the races scoring touchdowns of our lifetimes??

What exactly is this dog protecting 😂 pic.twitter.com/htAftJ4vYh

— Banned Vids (@VidsBanned) June 2, 2025

if the bears o-line is not significantly improved then tonite's game is just gonna be another ******* ****show for a program that is running outta time in building a resume for national prominence in the next round of conference relegations due to years of failed/incompetent athletic director leadership from williams, knowlton & now worst of all the evils as **** jay & jenny

if the bears o-line physically and violently dominates the bruins defenders then shocky is gonna be the 1st person out in STORMIN THE FIELD close to midnite past the armed totalitarian yellow jacket security detail (which could result in the monster getting his azz thrown in city of berkeley lock up at 3:00 am in the early morning because he don't got no ******* bail money) running at the speed of light towards the epicenter of planet earth!!

u feel me brah??

https://instagr.am/p/DceH8vLBeDq

Shocky1 said:

---

dwm, on some level you, the monster & the other almost 60,000 SOLD OUT fans all know that closely (which will be impossible for clinically depressed lazy azz/maybe incarcerated sofa king tv fans like not so bright bear but the good news is that there is still time to make plans to be at memorial stadium tonite) watching cal's MONSTER (finally) offensive line will reveal the keys to which team is gonna capture the hearts moving forward of the 2 high expectations fanbases in tonite's uc championship battle!!

will tyson, sioape, jimothy, bastian & frederick successfully PROTECT the program's generational talent humble FAITH based 3.75 gpa lefty qb1 from ewa beach in the downfield vertical passing attack & create running lanes (the bears wuz an abysmal 133rd outta 134 teams last season in rushing) for the uber talented 3.6 gpa rb1 from apollo high school on rolo/somerville dialed up PITCHOUTS to the edges in wide open spaces that will result in the most EPIC off to the races scoring touchdowns of our lifetimes??

What exactly is this dog protecting 😂 pic.twitter.com/htAftJ4vYh

— Banned Vids (@VidsBanned) June 2, 2025

if the bears o-line is not significantly improved then tonite's game is just gonna be another ******* ****show for a program that is running outta time in building a resume for national prominence in the next round of conference relegations due to years of failed/incompetent athletic director leadership from williams, knowlton & now worst of all the evils as **** jay & jenny

if the bears o-line physically and violently dominates the bruins defenders then shocky is gonna be the 1st person out in STORMIN THE FIELD close to midnite past the armed totalitarian yellow jacket security detail (which could result in the monster getting his azz thrown in city of berkeley lock up at 3:00 am in the early morning because he don't got no ******* bail money) running at the speed of light towards the epicenter of planet earth!!

u feel me brah??

https://instagr.am/p/DceH8vLBeDq

---

People think I'm crazy but I will be in my seat watching oline warmups. I better see some sort of firing out warmups from them and not the stand up, arms extended bs every single rep. It's just warmups but it shows some sort of physical nature of the oline right off the bat. No more Wilcox softness.

100% dls, anae (like the rest of the wilcox staff) did NOT have his room mentally ready to play a VIOLENT 60 minutes of football during the lethargic eerily quiet pregame warm ups at snapdragon stadium last september (the monster knew we wuz ****** even before the opening kickoff), granite statue right tackle leon bell (started for colorado in their wild azz win this past week) wuz visibly yawning kinda like he didn't get enuf sleep or something

also kinda curious to see if ike's historically candy azz soft room is gonna bring nyan boateng NFL BLOCKING physicality (ZERO bears wrs drafted in the last decade) to the uc championship game, r u ready??

yeah watching pre game warms up in the stadium is often a glimpse into a team's mental psyche & an indicator of whose ******* ready to throw some ******* knockout blows or not (this is of course all lost on the sofa king gameday thread tv fans who don't gotta clue about anything that's happened on the football field during the last decade)

One of the nastiest cases of “f*ck around and find out” just went down in Korean MMA

Straight out of a movie 😳 pic.twitter.com/tGeUbziHAp

— Happy Punch (@HappyPunch) May 2, 2026

CATCH HIM IF YOU CAN 💨@mattmorad10 with the 29-yard scamper for his first TD of the game!

4Q 3:47 | WAG 31, SCSU 7

📺 @NECFrontRow #LetsFly | #NECFB pic.twitter.com/SXDGCohOBw

— Wagner College Football (@Wagner_Football) September 5, 2026

wagner seahawks 31
southern connecticut state owls 7

playing on their home field on staten island the seahawks (1-1) didn't give a hoot about their birds of a feather opponent!!

Mason. Heintschel. pic.twitter.com/F7mYkqzFiz

— Pitt Football (@Pitt_FB) September 5, 2026

pittsburgh panthers 59
miami red hawks 14

the bears 2026 regular season finale is gonna bring the panthers (1-0) qb1 mason heintschel to memorial stadium, today the rocket arm gunslinger threw for an unreal 453 yards & 7 touchdowns with zero interceptions

You're my boy Blue! 🤩

➡️ 53-yard reception
➡️ @mason_heinch06's fourth TD pass
➡️ 5 play, 75-yard drive

📺 @TheCW_Sports

Pitt 38, Miami (OH) 14 pic.twitter.com/sGvXmSjvFH

— Pitt Football (@Pitt_FB) September 5, 2026

pittsburgh's steel town rushing d wuz industrial polluting brutal allowing only a toxic 28 yards on 21 carries on the ground but let's keep an eye on the panthers porous passing d giving up 261 yards thru the air to the red hawks at allegiant stadium down by the river across roberto clemente bridge

58-yard field goal by Pitt's Antonio Chadha. pic.twitter.com/kSctycAtMa

— Pete Nakos (@PeteNakos) September 5, 2026

^ this is NOT pittsburgh native high strung ryan coe (thx longwell), shocky got walked to his car (a dented avis rental) that afternoon

sheetz is NOT in the same league as buc-ee's!!#