"This coach was so persistent in his text messages, and one night invited me over to the stadium offices at midnight..."*
"I get a text from the coach. "Meet me in my room".
"If I responded please leave me alone to a DM, I was answered back with "Im going to treat you like the hoe that you are".
In the old days these were blown up on poster boards. Today they are displayed in a PowerPoint.

*I presume an inference can be drawn from the evidence that there are solid reasons this crew pursued football as a career rather than rocket science.
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“I love Cal deeply. What are the directions to The Portal from Sproul Plaza?”