cal's monster offensive line

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Shocky1
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2:51p, 3/14/23
the gauchos averaged an uptempo (but not fast) 72.2 points per game this season which can be contrasted to the bears snail ball of 58.3 points per game...reality is that mcdonalds all americans got zero interest in playing a style of play that won't develop them for the nba & multi million dollar contracts (and unlimited chocolate mcflurries forevah)



fun 2023 salary comparisons:

mark fox: $1,900,000+
the con artist: $1,300,000+
joe pasternack: $400,000+
gmp's extra gmail storage: 100+ bucks or something
shocky (1st time back at haas in 6 years/solo stormin' the floor): 50 cent

https://instagr.am/p/Cm4nv1MP6Tg
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In reply to Shocky1 • 3:34p, 3/14/23
Shocky1 said:
my man jaylen brown holding the tree pose



yoga enables one to find their inner strength & quiet the monkey voices that are constantly talking in our heads

the magic of cal basketball (whose ur yoga buddy?)#

public message to s&c coach brian johnson since he don't respond to my emails:

coach, it's great stan the man is back making money, ohana and all, but where the **** r the yoga quick twitch movements in ur program?

iz cal's monster's offensive line gonna move like slo mo granite statutes on valium again in 2023 or wut?

what's the gameplan brian, is bend, agility & balance along with core muscles injury resilience important to u?

let me know if u wanna do a zoom with me & jaylen, ok?

https://instagr.am/p/Covi5KSgsyy
t-rexs r losers (just ask the princess)#
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In reply to Shocky1 • 6:48p, 3/14/23
Shocky1 said:
Shocky1 said:

jennifer simon o'neil monster profile:

when the monster wuz around the athletic department on a regular basis back during the cal's monster class days it was well known by multiple coaches in multiple different sports that teri mckeever wuz mentally abusing the women's swimmers but that she wuz enabled by her close friend (mckeever is her child's godmother) & athletic department chief of staff (#2 ranking bureaucrat) jennifer simon o'neil

with her close friendship with mckeever in mind simon o'neil is flat out lying when she's quoted in the munger report that she wuz not aware of any issues within the women's swimming program...wut???

and given that she is the #2 person in the cal athletic department it's hard to believe the con artist didn't know anything also but his ability to misread people & situations is remarkable as his annual average salary of $1,300,000+ thru 2029

simon-o'neil has taken a page out of the knowlton paranoid/lack of transparency playbook by not making any twitter posts in almost 2 years...she has also retroactively scrubbed her twitter free of any references to the women's swimming program...what athletic department in the united states of america got the 2 highest rankings employees not on twitter?

donating to these non communicative worthless bureaucrats that are myopically working to deemphasize the revenue sports in berkeley is akin to burning ur $$$$$$ in the dumpster behind haas, it is recommended that you withhold donations until andrew mcgraw is named the new athletic director

and this will happen, multiple different major donors have confirmed to me during the last week that chancellor chryst knows now she made a mistake extending james arthur knowlton & lacks confidence in his abilities/decision making

wheels in motion#
cal's women athletic teams updates:

basketball: 13-17 this season, 10th seed in the pac 12 tournament, lost tonite to washington state, poorly coached

beach volleyball: 1-1 this season

cross country: finished 10th in the pac 12 tournament, losing this season to bay area division ii/iii schools that don't offer schollys

field hockey: 4-11 this season

golf: ranked 39th in the nation, women's college golf is dominated by high gpa asians, stanford can't sign everybody, this should be an annual top 10 program in the nation

gymnastics: 9-1-2 this season

lacrosse: 1-4 this season, 2-16 last season

rowing: 6th place ncca tournament last season

soccer: 10-5-6 this season

softball: 14-2 this season, coach chelsea spencer is the best women's coach in berkeley

swimming & diving: 7-2 this season

tennis: 3-4 this season

track & field: not ranked in the current top 25

volleyball: 7-23 this season, 0-20 in both the pac 12 this season & last season

water polo: 12-3 this season

cal women's basketball update:

pac 12 freshman of the year 2 years ago & the program's only legit returning scoring threat is in the transfer portal, jayda curry no longer references cal in her twitter header

the women's basketball team is heading towards a 25+ loss season that could rival fox's 3-29 record for futility in scoring points while playing in front of crowds of under 300 fans while paying the head coach almost $500,000 (her contract wuz also extended by knowlton)

yeah, the con artist & jennifer simon-o'neil are the dream (ok nightmares) team

this is cal women's athletics (needs to be rightsized)#
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Econ141
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In reply to Shocky1 • 6:55p, 3/14/23
Shocky1 said:
Shocky1 said:
Shocky1 said:

jennifer simon o'neil monster profile:

when the monster wuz around the athletic department on a regular basis back during the cal's monster class days it was well known by multiple coaches in multiple different sports that teri mckeever wuz mentally abusing the women's swimmers but that she wuz enabled by her close friend (mckeever is her child's godmother) & athletic department chief of staff (#2 ranking bureaucrat) jennifer simon o'neil

with her close friendship with mckeever in mind simon o'neil is flat out lying when she's quoted in the munger report that she wuz not aware of any issues within the women's swimming program...wut???

and given that she is the #2 person in the cal athletic department it's hard to believe the con artist didn't know anything also but his ability to misread people & situations is remarkable as his annual average salary of $1,300,000+ thru 2029

simon-o'neil has taken a page out of the knowlton paranoid/lack of transparency playbook by not making any twitter posts in almost 2 years...she has also retroactively scrubbed her twitter free of any references to the women's swimming program...what athletic department in the united states of america got the 2 highest rankings employees not on twitter?

donating to these non communicative worthless bureaucrats that are myopically working to deemphasize the revenue sports in berkeley is akin to burning ur $$$$$$ in the dumpster behind haas, it is recommended that you withhold donations until andrew mcgraw is named the new athletic director

and this will happen, multiple different major donors have confirmed to me during the last week that chancellor chryst knows now she made a mistake extending james arthur knowlton & lacks confidence in his abilities/decision making

wheels in motion#
cal's women athletic teams updates:

basketball: 13-17 this season, 10th seed in the pac 12 tournament, lost tonite to washington state, poorly coached

beach volleyball: 1-1 this season

cross country: finished 10th in the pac 12 tournament, losing this season to bay area division ii/iii schools that don't offer schollys

field hockey: 4-11 this season

golf: ranked 39th in the nation, women's college golf is dominated by high gpa asians, stanford can't sign everybody, this should be an annual top 10 program in the nation

gymnastics: 9-1-2 this season

lacrosse: 1-4 this season, 2-16 last season

rowing: 6th place ncca tournament last season

soccer: 10-5-6 this season

softball: 14-2 this season, coach chelsea spencer is the best women's coach in berkeley

swimming & diving: 7-2 this season

tennis: 3-4 this season

track & field: not ranked in the current top 25

volleyball: 7-23 this season, 0-20 in both the pac 12 this season & last season

water polo: 12-3 this season

cal women's basketball update:

pac 12 freshman of the year 2 years ago & the program's only legit returning scoring threat is in the transfer portal, jayda curry no longer references cal in her twitter header

the women's basketball team is heading towards a 25+ loss season that could rival fox's 3-29 record for futility in scoring points while playing in front of crowds of under 300 fans while paying the head coach almost $500,000 (her contract wuz also extended by knowlton)

yeah, the con artist & jennifer simon-o'neil are the dream (ok nightmares) team

this is cal women's athletics (needs to be rightsized)#


Fire them all. Everytime I look at the score ticker tape at the bottom of the screen on pac-12 networks, I just keep seeing cal scores where we are always losing. Get these morons out!
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Shocky1
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9:10p, 3/14/23

national 2024 quarterback prospect with 24 offers 6'2" 190 lbs luke moga from sunnyslope high school in north central phoenix watched monday's practice with coach spav, yeah luke knows who coached up the arizona cardinal's playmaking quarterback kylar murrary

luke combines an arm that can make all the throws with 4.52 speed (runs track)

as an elite student athlete with academic ambition & a 4.0 gpa that's gonna be a plus for them california golden bears in this recruitement as they compete for his signature against some of the truck stop towns/schools for dumb azzs...stanford is not a player at this time

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (including the slope)
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Shocky1
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5:47a, 3/15/23


who is the only candidate on the made up coaching lists that consist of primarily old white guys that would be great hinge hook ups for knowlton that got a current player (that is known/respected by the current bears) like andre kelly that will 100% vouch for him to stabilize the return of key players on the roster aka grant newell?

who is the only coach that can bring in an elite guard like ajay mitchell to ensure the bears don't lose 20+ games again next season?...college basketball today is point guard dominated, a facilitator/distributor is absolutely necessary to win basketball games at this level

who is the only coach that can 100% save the 2023 high school recruiting class of rodney brown & devin curtis according to their aau coach ryan silver?...joe pasternack has proven that he can successfully recruit at the high school (brown & curtis), international (ajay mitchell is from belgium) & transfer portal (andrew kelly from cal) levels

who is the only coach who got longtime relationships with cal's whale donors to build a basketball only practice facility (not the con artist's $125,000,000+ quidditch facility which is never gonna get built) & also raise the necessary nil dollars for future mcdonalds all americans?

who is the only coach who has worked with berkeley admissions & got a track record of recruiting high gpa true students athletes at a uc sister school like santa barbara?...the vast majority of these old white guys on these made up lists have built their careers around selling 2.5 gpa ballers hoop dreams of nba mansions, that's not gonna work at the #1 ranked public university in the world

who is the only coach who has previously worked in berkeley & is passionate about selling out haas which will mask the con artist's mind boggling hire of an unqualified markeisha everrett who has tried to relocate the few remaining berkeley students to behind the basket & got no clue about the gameday traditions of cal football/basketball or how to sells tixs with the exodus of the oakland raiders or the family unaffordability of the golden state warriors?

who is the only coach who will not only engage his players, their families, fans/donors but also the media & general public despite working for a con artist who hasn't tweeted in a couple of years & is afraid to be transparent & conduct any interviews?...when is the bearinsider.com interview with the con artist gonna happen?

who is the only coach that is gonna be recommended when the con artist reaches out to dennis gates?

joe pasternack will reshape the atmosphere in the basketball facilities as a player's coach that celebrates/frees them up to play with joy & freedom (without fear like last season) with aggressive intensity (the fiery sammy alajiki is gonna love/thrive with this transformation)

the biggest lies told to cal fans is that this program cannot win because of the excuses perpetuated by the con artist & parroted by dumb azzs like canzano & califortunate among a few others who don't got no connections to accurate information...they will tell you that mark fox is "respected" by the players (100% not true according to families & former coaches) & that's he "hard working" (200% not true, the least visible college coach in the nation on the summertime aau circuit) which have set the program back the last 6 years along with perhaps the biggest lie that wyking jones "is a good person" which could not be absolutely further from the truth for the former assistant coach who used pitino's mother/daughter prostitution tandem for recruiting purposes while at louisville, ran off 2 high academic players that should've never been recruited in the 1st place by him, told multiple players to transfer/forego berkeley degrees when he wuz fired, lost the respect of every single person in the program (other than his hand selected s&c coach the mentally unstable jackson) when he sent theo home from hawaii which resulted in the worst loss in the history of cal basketball when the listless bears got blown out by d2 chaminade (that's the day i turned in my floor seats while in maui & took a 6 year vacation from cal bbb) & conspired to censor cal's monster class behind my back



ive got bigger passions in life right now than cal basketball so its kinda doubtful that ima gonna attend 150+ games in a row again as the director of recruiting/gameday energy but its my intent in perhaps the final chapter of my love letter to the magic of cal basketball to champion the hiring of joe pasternack as the next head basketball coach in berkeley





where the wild things r (at the palace)#
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Shocky1
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In reply to Shocky1 • 1:29p, 3/15/23
Shocky1 said:
shocky's dumb azz friends: mr sun angel (money guy behind the asu nil collective) from silverleaf who got president michael crow & athletic director ray anderson on speed dial tole me these pac 12 four corner schools (asu, utah, arizona & colorado) to the big 12 unsourced rumours are not legit & just part of an intense misinformation campaign by the big 12

let's be real here, the con artist is afraid to make any public (including twitter) comments/interviews cuz he know's chancellor christ is working to terminate his employment so the only real source for any pac 12 realignment for bears fans is the monster

**** ucla's tracy pierson & his sorry azz broken down lies in an effort to undermine cal's 2024 junior day, these 2 teams are gonna meet this fall at the rose bowl & that's gonna be the biggest game of the year

chicken "4.0 gpa" little is not gonna move to the truck stop conference with **** academic schools (don't be a dumb azz)#

so who is the person behind the big 12's misinformation campaign that comes up with fake news that's repeated by ucla's tracy pierson & the national media re: the demise of the pac 12 & the total fabrication of potential expansion candidates of north texas & colorado state?

that would be one of the most alpha bad azz *****es on planet earth, meet karen brodkin who rivals the iraqi minister of information for making **** up, compounding problems is that brodkin wuz passed over for the pac 12 commissioner job in the last recruitment, she got zero ethics/moral compass



but the real question cal fans should be asking is why isn't our athletic director sharing this information with us?...does he truly not know (which is certainly a possibility) or is he afraid to speak in public without prearranged questions/answers with his awareness that chancellor christ is working to terminate his employment?

andrew mcgraw for athletic director (revenue sports come 1st, then rightsize the financially unsustainable 30+ sports while shedding worthless bureaucrats)#

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JimSox
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In reply to Big C • 3:30p, 3/15/23
Big C said:

Shocky, are you saying that there are people out there who pledge to give a large sum of money, get a bunch of atta-boys for it and then later quietly end up not actually giving it?!? Oh wow, I just hope they are not the Cal Football and Cal Basketball donors of the next few years...
Or former Presidents
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3:39p, 3/15/23
https://instagr.am/p/CLfq7alDgBj
or former cheerleaders
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4:51p, 3/15/23


or former hairdressers
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4:53p, 3/15/23


or former basketball head coaches
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4:55p, 3/15/23


or former rescue/foster doggys that need our love & forever homes in a safe zone
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7:12p, 3/15/23

https://instagr.am/p/CavCpqMp_cm
the breakfast of losers (where's the 32 oz green juice?)#
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7:48p, 3/15/23


cal's monster offensive line interview with coach bloesch

special shout to guard trent ramsey: "trent has done a great job since i got here, he's really bought-in in the weight room, he's got his body in a better place than it was last fall"

"but let's be real here, shocky is the key difference maker with respects to the future of cal's monster offensive line in berkeley"

king of the hill (mike saffell's mentor)#
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Shocky1
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In reply to Shocky1 • 2:28a, 3/16/23
Shocky1 said:

fun cal's monster offensive line contest: $1,000,000 (or award substitution at the sole discretion of the monster) to the winner

award: the winner must correctly list from left to right, front row to middle row & back row all of the trench life california golden bears, got it?

contest rules: hare bear & other assorted high iq super sleuths are encouraged to participate but keep in mind the monster reserves the right to change or waive any or all rules/regulations in a capricious manner without advance notice or any justification...shocky reserves the right to pay the winner in us dollars, polynesian currency, ftx cryptocurrency or monopoly money...a curvy brunette yoga female with somewhat accurate entries will be given absolute preference in shopping at restoration hardware or something

in case of tie entries: winner be determined by the most accurate guess of brayden rohme's weight heading into 2023 spring ball

helpful hints: coach mike bloesch's sons names are beau & drew...future head coach in waiting mike saffell got a **** t-shirt collection...cindo don't like free food

submit ur entries, let's have an adventure, our heads in the clouds but our gravity centered



the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (don't be a dumb azz)
https://instagr.am/p/CDPfJN9Bupz
restoration hardware's cloud sofa will NOT be awarded to any winners at this time for conked out afternoon naps or somethng

1st row: sioape vatikani, tj session, ender aguilar, jackson brown, the bloesch fam (mike, beau & drew)

2nd row: mike saffell, joshua stovall, trent ramsey, dylan jemtegaard, dashaun harris, brian driscoll

3rd row: brayden rohme, bastian swinney, nick morrow, colin hamilton, everett johnson

cal's monster offensive line#
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1:03p, 3/16/23


https://vimeo.com/45797764

the souls of mischief & fellow mutts of mixed descent state championship high school head coach lou richie (dad is black/moms is white, played ball at clemson then got a berkeley degree) & shocky (haas b-school grad, future substitute yoga teacher) discussing the bishop o'dowd pipeline to berkeley

this pipeline has resulted in mcdonalds all american ivan rabb, starting point guard paris austin & current bears monty bowser & marsalis roberson

joe pasternack got the absolute respect for lou (and vice versa) & richie would be a significant addition to the next staff as a life/academics coach with his ability to mentor young men, assist in the recruitment of nor cal bounce back portal transfers that didn't wanna play for the last 2 coaches utilizing his unsurpassed network of california high school head coach relationships, academic support to ensure attainment of berkeley degrees, film breakdown/game planning for future opponents & facilitating the scheduling of future high school basketball tournaments at our haas



dragons r smart#
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Shocky1
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In reply to Shocky1 • 3:01p, 3/16/23
Shocky1 said:
fun contest: who is the better athletic director???


PROGRAMS:

jd wicker: san diego state runs a cost conscious 17 programs (6 mens & 11 womens)

james arthur knowlton: cal run 30 financially unsustainable programs with a current massive bailout from the chancellor's discretionary fund (that will be likely significantly reduced with the next chancellor)


CONSTRUCTION:

https://instagr.am/p/CkPWd2-oYyf
jd wicker got the $310,000,000 leed gold snapdragon stadium opened this year

james arthur knowlton is in his 4th year of tryna fundraise his time share $125,000,000+ quidditch facility that's NEVER gonna be built


MEN"S BASKETBALL PROGRM:

san diego state is ranked #22 in the nation at 21-5 led by former bear matt bradley who intensely disliked/felt disrespected by his former coach

cal is 3-24 with a head coach that wuz extended contractually from 2024 to 2025


STUDENT ATTENDANCE:

san diego state students attend the games for free, it's a party atmosphere with loud crowds that is developing a future generation pipeline of season tix buyers/donors

cal: the athletic department sells tixs to financially strapped students with markeisha everett & her fellow unemployable sidekick vasileios iliopoulos tryna relocate the few remaining students from midcourt to behind the basket


CONFERNCE NEGOTIATIONS:

jd wicker has relentlessly pursued a pac 12 invitation for san diego state

james arthur knowlton hasn't done **** other than to repeatedly lie to donors during the board of regents process telling them it wuz "50/50" that ucla would be blocked from joining the big 10 when in reality it wuz a less than 1% desperation hail mary pass for losers


ANNUAL SALARY:

jd wicker: $340,000+
https://nevadasportsnet.com/news/reporters/how-much-every-mountain-west-athletic-director-will-make-in-2022-23

james arthur knowlton: $1,300,000+ average annual salary thru 2029


verdict: tell the con artist to **** off (andrew mcgraw for athletic director)

congrats to former california golden bear matt bradley on his all around developed game of 21 points, 7 rebounds, 4 assists, only 1 turnover & zero hero ball in leading his san diego state aztecs to a 1st round ncca tournament victory over the charleston yeaman's hall cougars 63-57

what wuz the response of arguably the worst athletic director in the history of college sports to matt & then andre kelly's transfers???

extend the head coach for another year at $1,900,000+ only then to have to fire him a year later & financially obligate cal for the additional year salary

yeah just making one dumb azz decision after another dumb azz decision & burning thru ur money

go aztecs (to the zoo)#
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4:39p, 3/16/23

6'4" 230 lbs apex predator edge defender, missouri city, texas#

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TomBalk
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5:10p, 3/16/23
Shocky,

what do you think the odds are that Pasternak gets/wants the CAL job?

Or who do you think we will end up with ?
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5:27p, 3/16/23
tom, joe 100% wants the job as he's long considered it his "dream job"

pasternack's wife lindsay (pinewood high school, university of arizona grad) has already mentally made the move back back to the bay, unless joe wants to live all by himself in a condo by the sandpiper golf course he's gonna accept the cal offer

then elite point guard ajay mitchell (big west player of the year, the modern college basketball game is facilitated by 1s) will enter the transfer portal & arrive in berkeley this summer with 2 years of remaining eligilbity

ryan silver the aau coach for both of cal's current commits sharpshooter rodney brown (already a better shooter than everybody on the current roster, the player comparison is alan crabbe) & bouncy post player devin curtis will all work together for recommits to the bears & both players will arrive for cal's summer bridge program and begin the much needed s&c development for both slim constructed true student athletes

joe will contact multiple potential assistant coaches including recruiting dynamo (former stanford assistant, is he tired of the freezing azz midwest winters?) adam cohen, theo robertson & richard midgley as he fills out his staff...strong possibility that his santa barbara director of business operations andrew payne will be asked to rejoin him in berkeley and for bishop o'dowd's lou richie to become a life/academics coach too that utilizes his extensive california high school coaching network for potential bounceback portal transfers

pasternack will immediately begin fundraising for nil dollars for his players & the much needed scaled back basketball only practice facility

outreach to start selling season tixs & sell out haas will be a major point of emphasis for the fiery leader

a player's program#
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Oakbear
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In reply to Shocky1 • 5:48p, 3/16/23
Shocky1 said:
tom, joe 100% wants the job as he's long considered it his "dream job"

pasternack's wife lindsay (pinewood high school, university of arizona grad) has already mentally made the move back back to the bay, unless joe wants to live all by himself in a condo by the sandpiper golf course he's gonna accept the cal offer

then elite point guard ajay mitchell (big west player of the year, the modern college basketball game is facilitated by 1s) will enter the transfer portal & arrive in berkeley this summer with 2 years of remaining eligilbity

ryan silver the aau coach for both of cal's current commits sharpshooter rodney brown (already a better shooter than everybody on the current roster, the player comparison is alan crabbe) & bouncy post player devin curtis will all work together for recommits to the bears & both players will arrive for cal's summer bridge program and begin the much needed s&c development for both slim constructed true student athletes

joe will contact multiple potential assistant coaches including recruiting dynamo (former stanford assistant, is he tired of the freezing azz midwest winters?) adam cohen, theo robertson & richard midgley as he fills out his staff...strong possibility that his santa barbara director of business operations andrew payne will be asked to rejoin him in berkeley and for bishop o'dowd's lou richie to become a life/academics coach too that utilizes his extensive california high school coaching network for potential bounceback portal transfers

pasternack will immediately begin fundraising for nil dollars for his players & the much needed scaled back basketball only practice facility

outreach to start selling season tixs & sell out haas will be a major point of emphasis for the fiery leader

a player's program#
I hope you are correct, but I have so little faith in JK...also, he might hire another old white guy just to spite Shocky
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8:21p, 3/16/23

6' 170 lbs 3.5 gpa wide receiver, guyer high school, denton texas#
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Econ141
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In reply to Oakbear • 9:45p, 3/16/23
Oakbear said:
Shocky1 said:
tom, joe 100% wants the job as he's long considered it his "dream job"

pasternack's wife lindsay (pinewood high school, university of arizona grad) has already mentally made the move back back to the bay, unless joe wants to live all by himself in a condo by the sandpiper golf course he's gonna accept the cal offer

then elite point guard ajay mitchell (big west player of the year, the modern college basketball game is facilitated by 1s) will enter the transfer portal & arrive in berkeley this summer with 2 years of remaining eligilbity

ryan silver the aau coach for both of cal's current commits sharpshooter rodney brown (already a better shooter than everybody on the current roster, the player comparison is alan crabbe) & bouncy post player devin curtis will all work together for recommits to the bears & both players will arrive for cal's summer bridge program and begin the much needed s&c development for both slim constructed true student athletes

joe will contact multiple potential assistant coaches including recruiting dynamo (former stanford assistant, is he tired of the freezing azz midwest winters?) adam cohen, theo robertson & richard midgley as he fills out his staff...strong possibility that his santa barbara director of business operations andrew payne will be asked to rejoin him in berkeley and for bishop o'dowd's lou richie to become a life/academics coach too that utilizes his extensive california high school coaching network for potential bounceback portal transfers

pasternack will immediately begin fundraising for nil dollars for his players & the much needed scaled back basketball only practice facility

outreach to start selling season tixs & sell out haas will be a major point of emphasis for the fiery leader

a player's program#
I hope you are correct, but I have so little faith in JK...also, he might hire another old white guy just to spite Shocky


This is correct. It does not matter how qualified Pasternak is; he could have the credentials of Coach K, but if he cannot pass Knowlton's vigorous "vibe test", this is all for naught.

So the question really is - will Knowlton "just have a good feeling" about Pasternak? I'm thinking that the Jorge kick will be viewed positively by Knowlton given how he let the swimmers get abused. So we have that going for us.
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calumnus
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In reply to Econ141 • 10:06p, 3/16/23
Econ141 said:
Oakbear said:
Shocky1 said:
tom, joe 100% wants the job as he's long considered it his "dream job"

pasternack's wife lindsay (pinewood high school, university of arizona grad) has already mentally made the move back back to the bay, unless joe wants to live all by himself in a condo by the sandpiper golf course he's gonna accept the cal offer

then elite point guard ajay mitchell (big west player of the year, the modern college basketball game is facilitated by 1s) will enter the transfer portal & arrive in berkeley this summer with 2 years of remaining eligilbity

ryan silver the aau coach for both of cal's current commits sharpshooter rodney brown (already a better shooter than everybody on the current roster, the player comparison is alan crabbe) & bouncy post player devin curtis will all work together for recommits to the bears & both players will arrive for cal's summer bridge program and begin the much needed s&c development for both slim constructed true student athletes

joe will contact multiple potential assistant coaches including recruiting dynamo (former stanford assistant, is he tired of the freezing azz midwest winters?) adam cohen, theo robertson & richard midgley as he fills out his staff...strong possibility that his santa barbara director of business operations andrew payne will be asked to rejoin him in berkeley and for bishop o'dowd's lou richie to become a life/academics coach too that utilizes his extensive california high school coaching network for potential bounceback portal transfers

pasternack will immediately begin fundraising for nil dollars for his players & the much needed scaled back basketball only practice facility

outreach to start selling season tixs & sell out haas will be a major point of emphasis for the fiery leader

a player's program#
I hope you are correct, but I have so little faith in JK...also, he might hire another old white guy just to spite Shocky


This is correct. It does not matter how qualified Pasternak is; he could have the credentials of Coach K, but if he cannot pass Knowlton's vigorous "vibe test", this is all for naught.

So the question really is - will Knowlton "just have a good feeling" about Pasternak? I'm thinking that the Jorge kick will be viewed positively by Knowlton given how he let the swimmers get abused. So we have that going for us.


I don't agree this is the MOST important quality in a coach, but as Joe's future boss, Knowlton might really like this:


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12:47a, 3/17/23
tropical calumnus, cool video but knowlton's loyalty is to his $1,300,000 annual salary thru 2029 & his empire of 30+ financially unsustainable sports, not football & basketball
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In reply to Oakbear • 1:07a, 3/17/23
Oakbear said:

I hope you are correct, but I have so little faith in JK...also, he might hire another old white guy just to spite Shocky


no worries, oakman, that's just more time for yoga on the beach, fundraising for animal advocacy in maricopa county & dinner at nobu (plus lazy azz conked out naps in the afternoon)

this is a recap of a daddy/daughter date for me & taylor back in the cal's monster class era:

show up at the hostess stand at tayor's favorite restaurant nobu malibu very late this evening without a reservation


shocky: good evening, we'd like a table on the patio overlooking the ocean please

curvy brunette yoga hostess: i'm sorry sir, we're fully committed this evening...would you like me to put you on the waiting list for the sushi bar, there are unfortunately no guarantees that any seats will open up tonite

shocky: did you know that i'm a california golden bear?

curvy brunette yoga hostess: really?

shocky (posting up with a headstand directly in front of the hostess stand with my giuseppe zanotti kicks in the air): roarrrrrrrrrr

polite applause/clapping from the 3 hostesses & maybe a few strange looks from the bar

curvy brunette yoga hostess (flipping her hair): i have a yoga practice too

shocky: tell me something i don't already know

curvy brunette yoga hostess (to a male server): please seat them at table 7 on the patio now

dirty looks at the shockster from those who've been told there are no tables available now

shocky: dom arigato

curvy brunette yoga hostess: namaste



for free (table)#
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In reply to Shocky1 • 2:59a, 3/17/23
Shocky1 said:
tropical calumnus, cool video but knowlton's loyalty is to his $1,300,000 annual salary thru 2029 & his empire of 30+ financially unsustainable sports, not football & basketball


Yes, but since Knowlton wants to keep his job above all else he would like to hear "loyal to your boss" as something Joe values above all else.
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10:30a, 3/17/23
amir abdur rahim presents himself very well as both likable and with clear sense of focus during the on court interview along with extremely high positive energy/karma

kinda reminds me of the skillset of the best yoga teachers

real talk#
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11:01a, 3/17/23
https://instagr.am/p/Cp3MR9Fvs7b
ajay mitchell is the slightly less athletic but significantly less unselfish point guard cal comparison to tyrone wallace, his ability to pass into tight windows is unreal
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6:30p, 3/17/23

do you believe in the magic of cal football & basketball???

sam jackson v is a believer, **** the opinions & the logistics...is ajay mitchell a believer too?

the day the monster (walking onto the court wearing the cal lid clapping his hands at the 10 second mark in this video) sat courtside (next to the incandescent roberta martin and her sons chance & joshua) at the epicenter of basketball madison square garden (or as the jubilant bird puts it, "the gardenu") beating the nationally ranked hometown wolves of wall street crowd syracuse orangemen against all odds & beating the statistics

yeah farleigh dickinson is yet again conclusive proof that the heart understands things than the mind cannot begin to comprehend, excuses are for losers



let's ******* go (we attack)#

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the ******* world & planet earth
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In reply to Shocky1 • 7:28p, 3/17/23
I want Pasternak with Theo and another former Bear on staff. Let's bring back our stud players and get this program going!
I want Theo in living rooms recruiting and selling as the top assistant.
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In reply to 89Bear • 8:05p, 3/17/23
89Bear said:
I want Pasternak with Theo and another former Bear on staff. Let's bring back our stud players and get this program going!
I want Theo in living rooms recruiting and selling as the top assistant.

Theo fan here, but just curious, why would he be the "top assistant"?
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In reply to 89Bear • 8:26p, 3/17/23
89Bear said:
I want Pasternak with Theo and another former Bear on staff. Let's bring back our stud players and get this program going!
I want Theo in living rooms recruiting and selling as the top assistant.


89, theo robertson would be a valuable addition to the staff for recruiting & shooting mechanics/mindset development but he will not be the top associate head coach target when interviewed...the only major area of improvement in ajay mitchell's game is his perimeter shooting (3 pointers), robertson can help him get to the next level

theo is working for the pac 12 network right now along with serving as a liaison to the big c society, he told me this week that he is 100% eligible for reemployment in berkeley


rodney brown=the next alan crabbe sharpshooter in berkeley

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10:57p, 3/17/23
https://instagr.am/p/CFEltJSnevV
cal's monster offensive line (watch out for big foot on fridayy)#

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12:28a, 3/18/23

2023 california golden bears transfer portal update:

haas biz ad grad joel brown & sociology major grad kuany kuany are officially in the transfer portal and teammate joel hyder will not be playing for the bears next season

but no official decision yet from the pride of krefeld germany 7'1" 260 lbs lars thiemann, this is why the head coach decision needs to be made in the next couple of days

most casual fans fail to appreciate that thru hundreds of hours of disciplined practice to improve his shooting mechanics that lars improved from 48.7% his freshman year to 74.1% this season on free throws which is truly outstanding for a 5...honestly think similar improvement will happen next season with his post scoring around the bucket with better coaching & ajay mitchell dishing dimes (instead of the nickels thiemann got this season) & develop into a consistent 15+ points per game standout if he opts to stay in berkeley for his final season

it should not come as a surprise to anyone that lars had the greatest game of his career against them university of texas arlington mavericks (see video above) with 17 points on a lethal 8 of 10 field goals for 17 points & only 1 turnover which coincided with the monster's appearance with his daughter taylor on december 21st marking his only visit to his palace during the last 6 years

yeah shocky from his old floor seats provided the necessary very loud verbal instructions to lars only feet away to "demand the ball, lars, demand the ball" and "don't dribble, lars, no dribbling" along with "let's do this, lars, let's ******* go" which wuz witnessed 1st hand by a kinda embarazzed mike saffell & marshall cherrington

anyways with the monster potentially returning to haas next season if joe pasternack is the next head coach it makes a lotta sense for lars checking with his former friend/teammate andre kelly re: what's it like playing with elite facilitator ajay mitchell & for a fiery player's coach...if lars can assert himself more in imposing his will against much smaller pac 12 posts & work on catching passes (soft hands, baby) he could be a major force in berkeley next season as the starting center

i tole taylor in the car after the fun victory on our way to san francisco for dinner at fino ristorante with future son in law brendan glapion (staring salary out of boalt law, $200k+) that the highlite of the afternoon for me wuz seeing the 100% surprised (what's he doing here?) look on lars face when doing the solo stormin' the floor ended up with me fist bumping him with props in the postgame opponent walk thru line while his teammates looked on in bewilderment

this **** is getting live, yeah me & lars r everyone's favorite germans (well ok, maybe not the con artist)

fordere den ball, lars, fordere den ball, lass un gehen

https://instagr.am/p/Cc0cnSQsXXo
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