cal's monster mad dog

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In reply to eastcoastcal • 6:25p, 5/1/23
eastcoastcal said:
coastie, aziz is the key to a potential national championship run & shocky returning to his floor seats

the difference maker (from africa should be surrounded by those that truly love him)#
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9:27p, 5/1/23
Quote:
bearister, the shockster along with colin morikawa, max homa, james hahn, michael kim & byeong hun an (all 5 have earned their pga cards for next season) are not fans of the liv tour which is financed by the 9/11 bombers attack upon the united states of america

did you know that the #1 ranked player in the 2023 class eric lee from fullerton is gonna sign with coach walter this november?...yeah cal is a golf school that is gonna be competing for a national championship in the near future

the usa team was victorious last week at the president's cup in charlotte north carolina with key contributions by americans max homa & colin morikawa, the following is a loosely edited transcript of my conversations at around 6:30 pm in the locker room at quail hollow back in the day after my world rankings golf course evaluation which was arranged by fellow g2c2 (global golf centurion club, membership rules require the completion of at least 1 world top 100 golf magazine list, the shockster has played the last 17 world lists) member adam (who is a golf professional)
https://top100golf.blogspot.com/2006/01/people-who-have-played-top-100-golf.html

shocky: (standing at the sink trying to scrub the bunker sand outta his eyes from the 18th hole)

random dude: you ok?

shocky: your club's sand is terrific, same bright white silicone stuff as augusta, but it's a pain in the azz when it gets in your eyes, everything is kinda blurry or something

random dude: (who is tying a light blue tie with a glistening white starched shirt) sorry to hear that, are you the rater that's visiting today to see if we're a world top 100 golf course?...are we that good?

shocky: yeah, that's me, fun day today, your definitely a usa top 100 golf course...ima shocky (extending a fist bump)

random dude: nice to meet you, i'm roy...so how do you rate these world top 100 golf courses?...at my old job i used to get invited out to prairie dunes all the time

shocky: prairie dunes is an amazing links golfing experience, easily the best course in kansas and in my world top 25 rankings...hey, do you wanna join me and adam for a quick drink?

random dude: would love to talk about golf course architecture with you guys, that's my new hobby, but i got to go this work function at 7:00 pm

shocky: (thinking it's some boring azz corporate function with rubber chicken) can't you just show up late?

random dude: not really, i'm sort of the featured speaker

shocky: (feeling sorry for this guy) well, good luck then, at least you got to play golf this afternoon

random dude: yeah work is work, please tell adam to shoot me a text regarding when he can give me another lesson, thanks

adam: (as shocks walks over to him in the locker room) do you know who just insulted with your work thing stuff?

shocky: i dunno, somebody who wants a lesson with you?

adam: (shaking his head & laughing) guess what dumb azz, that's roy williams

shocky: (hustling back to the sink area) hey roy, didn't mean to hassle you

roy: (kinda laughing) that's ok, you would be a tenacious assistant coach with that attitude

shocky: well, now that you mention it, i'm the director of recruiting for the cal basketball program and the co author of cal's monster class with its several million views which is the most read thread in the history of college basketball...did you know we are currently in major battles with you for three mcdonald all americans?

roy: (with a kinda smirk and perhaps a glimpse of recognition) really, and what three prospects are you referring to?

shocky: ivan rabb, jaylen brown and caleb swanigan...i've branded these recruitments as cal's diamonds are forever class.. do you know anything about these guys or do you just delegate recruiting to your assistant coaches?

roy: (tight smile but perhaps with a bit of annoyance) do you got a minute or two?

shocky: sure

roy: ok, walk with me to valet then, i gotta speak across town in thirty minutes, this is just between us, ok?

and then as we walk thru the clubhouse to the valet area by the front door roy williams lectures me for 5 minutes non stop breaking down the skillsets of ivan rabb, jaylen brown and caleb swanigan

his detailed knowledge is mind boggling, he tells me that rabb (at that moment the #1 ranked player in the nation) is the most innate rebounder he's seen in years and very unselfish with the ball but that he's concerned about his unusual gait (note: ivan retired from the nba because of plantar fasciitis)...jaylen brown (ranked #5 in the class) is a future nba all star but will struggle in college with sharing the ball & 3 point shooting...caleb swanigan (ranked #12 in the class) could be a nba first rounder if he can successfully core out his body, his guardian roosevelt barnes is very involved in his recruitment (caleb, rip, was a cal silent commit but barnes refused to sign the letter of intent which resulted in him signing with purdue)

finally william's silver lexus suv shows up at the valet circle and roy looks me in the eyes & tells me with a little wink "nice meeting you, shocky, good luck in out recruiting me"

shocky is not a dumb azz, he knows what just happened...hall of famer roy williams is the featured speaker at dozens of fans/donor events throughout north carolina every year & its kinda hard to come up with fresh new intro speeches, he can't wait to get to his dinner in 30 minutes and tell everybody how he just met this crazy as **** berkeley guy who thinks they are going to out recruit the fabled north carolina program that's won multiple national championships, the crowd is gonna love it & howl with laughter

well guess what?...the shockster got commitment from all 3 of these mcdonald all americans & signed 2 of them

it's seem almost surreal that 6 years ago cal was near the pinnacle of college basketball in excitement & recruiting, what the **** happened?





the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked university in the world (including north carolina & more specifically chapel hill)
https://instagr.am/p/CqrA_y9MQex
there will be 5 golden bears competing this week at the wells fargo tournament at quail hollow in north carolina including past champion max homa, colin morikawa, james hahn, byeong hun an & michael kim
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slsYahoo
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9:54p, 5/1/23
Did this thread just get added? Don't recall seeing it prior to today
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75bear
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In reply to slsYahoo • 11:45p, 5/1/23
slsYahoo said:
Did this thread just get added? Don't recall seeing it prior to today
Hocus pocus
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Shocky1
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In reply to slsYahoo • 5:08a, 5/2/23
slsYahoo said:
Did this thread just get added? Don't recall seeing it prior to today
razzle dazzle

https://instagr.am/p/BlvWUMlg5h9
life is not linear (it's just a trick of the light)#
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Shocky1
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In reply to parentswerebears • 5:25a, 5/2/23
parentswerebears said:
I thought both just entered the portal, so I think they are good. I could be wrong, though.


teach, ur rite (as usual) but make no mistake about it, ur not even close to my favorite teaching pro

can anyone name this golf hole?...helpful clues, this is not half moon bay or tuscon country club...and why is shocky doing the "c" hand thingy backwards, wut a dumb azz



yoga flat abs r sexy as ****#
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eastcoastcal
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1:06p, 5/2/23
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rkt88edmo
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1:08p, 5/2/23
did we get a player or just a pair of giant shoes?
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sosheezy
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4:30p, 5/2/23
Coach Scherbanske getting his west coast recruiting connects in order
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Shocky1
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10:17p, 5/2/23
https://instagr.am/p/CrwN6z0J5Ql
welcome 6'5" 180 lbs multiple skillset wing keonte kennedy from westlake high school in austin

kennedy gotta lotta family support & a legit jersey collection with gear from his stops at xavier, utep & last season memphis, this will be his 6th season & final year of eligibility

https://instagr.am/p/Cnx8bQMtIkK
checking out keonte's career stats, wut's impressive is that there's been a steady trend of improved 3 point shooting: 25.7% to 24% to 31.9% to 38.1%...that's a clear indication that this is someone who is dedicated to improving his craft & that's kinda important for a program that couldn't score 50+ points in most games last season

yeah for keonte the hussle is forever


the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (including hill country)
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Shocky1
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In reply to sosheezy • 10:25p, 5/2/23
sosheezy said:
Coach Scherbanske getting his west coast recruiting connects in order
nice work sheezy, ryan silver is a key guy in west coast aau recruiting circles, he delivered both of cal's 2023 recruits rodney brown & devin curtis to mad dog
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In reply to Shocky1 • 7:33a, 5/3/23
Shocky1 said:


jaylon tyson will take an official trip to the truck stop town of lawrence this weekend arriving friday & departing sunday during which time coach prime's slippery white brother from another mother will selfishly downplay the importance of a college degree in a fiercely competitive global economy that favors the well educated from elite institutions like cal, stanford & the ivy league while walking the tyson family thru the tricked out basketball dorm/5 star hotel which includes a barber shop & a bowling alley because nothing in recruiting is more impressive to a young man making a life impacting decision with 50 year benefits/consequences is ephemeral eye candy that won't mean **** once ur injured or the basketball stops bouncing at which point ur 100% ****** and then their is the full realization that a mind is a terrible thing to waste but by then it's too ******* late & ur the night shift supervisor at the truck stop off the k-10 where u work really long retail hours for not much money because ur basically a discarded factory at that point cuz the 3 man weave is not really a marketplace valued skill & the nil dollars have long been spent and then u marry a lot lizard with cfm pumps until such time that u contract stds from her and then die a slow & painful death colored by regrets of a lifetime

or u can storm the floor with shocky & his yoga buddy jaylen at the #1 ranked public university in the world, we all got star stuff

-shocky "faulkner" schulz

https://instagr.am/p/Cm4nv1MP6Tg
"supposedly jt, everyone on our team, ima working"-devin askew
https://www.instagram.com/stories/babydev/3094049463194987480/




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7:59a, 5/3/23
https://instagr.am/p/CrrGM-Lvi24
joel brown to iona

the big apple (and next door to wykagyl)#
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5:21p, 5/3/23


dating cal, ucla or stanford female graduates:

back in the day shocky's gf at cal wuz a psychology major (she tole me that i wuz "a crockpot of contradictions") from national city, yeah she wuz a smokeshow & she eventually broke up with me cuz she wuz on academic probation "because of all the time we're spending together," yeah shocky got walked to his car (she later appeared bottomless in a hot tub for playboy's girls of the pac 10 issue)



my attitude these days is forks up & ****

https://instagr.am/p/CTNGReiA_1o
makes me kinda feel sorry for olivia's husband (shut up, shocky)#

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6:37p, 5/3/23

the cal staff is reaching out to north dakota state 6'9" 235 lbs elite unicorn grant nelson from tiny devil lakes nd, he is also in the nba draft evaluation process along with the transfer portal with 2 years of remaining eligiblity

17.9 ppg including 43% on 3 pointers & 9.3 rpg this season, grant is receiving interest from all the major basketball factories along with the nba...his gf soraya is on the track team & loves cali

https://instagr.am/p/CrwFHt1OX5o
the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (including the peace garden state)

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oskidunker
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6:44p, 5/3/23
Maybe if we get the Center from Utah Valley we can call Him "The Big Valley"
Go Bears!
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Shocky1
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6:58p, 5/3/23

congrats to new s&c coach sebastian hernandez on making the move from utah valley state to cal to keep the continuity thing going in berkeley (the monster wuz wrong thinking it would be scott thom)...the miami native also worked at florida state

hopefully he believes in yoga/meditation more than the football s&c coach who is stuck in a 1950s movie

look, don't tell nobody but he's also starred as the abuelita in camila cabello's havana, sebastian gotta lotta skills

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Shocky1
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9:07a, 5/4/23
hunter dickinson to kansas
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Shocky1
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1:01p, 5/4/23
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3:02p, 5/4/23
wide receiver jordyn tyson a strong oklahoma lean

pkg deal probably not in the cards#

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Shocky1
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10:18p, 5/4/23

aarp card (good luck dejuan)#
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Shocky1
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In reply to Shocky1 • 10:48a, 5/5/23
Shocky1 said:
wide receiver jordyn tyson a strong oklahoma lean

pkg deal probably not in the cards#
jordyn currently on an official visit to asu

dinner last nite at elements on camelback mtn#

https://instagr.am/p/CpxgkvCrNKj
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philbert
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In reply to Shocky1 • 12:49p, 5/5/23
Shocky1 said:
Shocky1 said:
wide receiver jordan tyson a strong oklahoma lean

pkg deal probably not in the cards#
jordan currently on an official visit to asu

dinner last nite at elements on camelback mtn#


What's jaylon doing?
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Shocky1
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12:52p, 5/5/23
got a text into my golf buddy mr silverleaf sun angel to see if jaylon is on the official visit to the valley of the sun

expect announcements from jaylon & jordyn to be at the same time

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1:05p, 5/5/23
just got a text back: "jaylon is not on a bb official visit"
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eastcoastcal
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In reply to Shocky1 • 1:07p, 5/5/23
Shocky1 said:
just got a text back: "jaylon is not on a bb official visit"
hooray

i really hope we can close on him
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LOUMFSG2
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In reply to Shocky1 • 1:14p, 5/5/23
Shocky1 said:
wide receiver jordyn tyson a strong oklahoma lean

pkg deal probably not in the cards#

Although a package deal is not likey, I am curious, does Jordyn have a Cal fb offer?
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Shocky1
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1:20p, 5/5/23
lou lou lemon, jordyn does not have an actionable offer from the cal football staff at this time

he wuz seriously injured last season, when he met coach prime**** for the 1st time jordyn honestly tole his coach he might not be able to play this season, that's when he wuz told to pack his **** & enter the portal

there is zero chance the colorado football team is not gonna incur major chemistry problems/lack of trust between semi pro players & the ruthless staff, almost nobody is gonna leave boulder with a diploma
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LOUMFSG2
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In reply to Shocky1 • 1:46p, 5/5/23
Thanks Shocky. Gonna be interesting to see what happens with Colorado football this year, nothing would surprise me . . .
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Shocky1
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2:09p, 5/5/23

championships r won in the offseason#
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eastcoastcal
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2:39p, 5/5/23
can fardaws play the 4?
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Shocky1
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2:48p, 5/5/23
coastie, fardaws is projected to play the 4 in the nba

mismatch nightmare for slow/thick 4s#
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Shocky1
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2:52p, 5/5/23
https://instagr.am/p/Cry3T10y94y
ivy faithe, what's ur gpa & r u gonna help ur daddy with his homework???

this is cal basketball (the roars at haas)#
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In reply to eastcoastcal • 3:44p, 5/5/23
eastcoastcal said:
can fardaws play the 4?
coastie, the bigger question u got ask urself is r u & arav gonna make sure when fardaws moves to berkeley around june 1st that he's introduced to some of the tasty culinary options of the fantastically diverse san francisco bay area or what?

logan's roadhouse in lubbock, nasty azz dog food for unhealthy as **** white people in west texas, eating this **** will literally kill u...cap

https://instagr.am/p/CnmqH-IuNy5
afghan burrito, freshly made reasonably priced cuisine for busy but health conscious students at the #1 ranked public university in the world that r building generational wealth (donors in training) thru intellectual capitalism

https://instagr.am/p/CdJkl2APFaZ
yeah fardaws got family in the bay & he's gonna make new friends too on the golden gate bridge walk home deep into the algorithms of the new conditions





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Shocky1
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In reply to Shocky1 • 3:54p, 5/5/23
Shocky1 said:

6'2" 175 lbs portland voo doo donuts transfer michael meadows with the commitment to coach mad dog, meadows got one year of remaining eligibility for the hollywood native from campbell hall high school

mike is not a dumb azz, he is a multiple time big sky all academic team honoree & is majoring in organizational communication which sounds kinda like being an anti house hoarder consultant or something

meadows had a back injury that cut his 2021 season short but last season performed with high shooting percentages at all 3 levels including a 39 point let if fly dominating performance against a strong santa clara team with notably zero turnovers

the bears the last 6 seasons have been plagued by guard turnovers (often unforced), meadows got a reputation for an excellent handle which is reflected in his low turnover average last season of 1.1 which is excellent for someone touching the ball a lot...this addition not only improves ball handling but also crooked azz shooting issues

https://instagr.am/p/CiymgjJr9gk
the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world

let if fly (thru the haas airspace)#
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